Wednesday, September 23, 2020

Tips: When We Can Forgive And Give Second Chances

 💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 It's easy to make quick assumptions when someone does something which offends us, especially if we care about that person and we have high expectations of them. If they didn't answer our text messages instantly yet we noticed their user status indicating they're online, we assume they are ignoring us deliberately, playing "hard to get", or they're being obnoxiously passive-aggressive and examining if we're a true friend who's patient enough to tolerate their immaturity.
A lot of individuals immediately dismiss a potential friendship, cancel their decision to share some personal concerns, and completely lose their trust in you once you unknowingly hurt them or disappointed them. They're unaware that yes you saw that they messaged you but you were busy doing an important task, you were about to respond but the WiFi connection got disconnected, you needed more time to reflect on how to formulate a good response, or some of the kids at your place were playing games on your cellphone and they curiously opened that sender's message and you're still oblivious about those messages you received but didn't yet read.
Patience, understanding and perseverance are noble qualities that are extremely essential for marriage and friendship to last long. In any project, bond or journey you wish to take in this imperfect dunya, you can expect mishaps, misunderstandings, miscommunication, inconveniences and obstacles to emerge once in a while. We, as Allah's servants, have the freewill to discontinue a friendship or transaction with someone for a glitch or mistake they've made, or we can defeat our pride, forgive them, and correct those blunders so our connection gets even stronger than before.
Not every individual though is worthy of reconciliation. Forgiving another Muslim doesn't necessarily mean allowing yourself to return to being treated unjustly and exposing yourself to toxic vibes. While we can forgive each soul who has mistreated us in the past, we have a right to carefully choose who we love, support, and spend on for Allah's sake.
🔹 Five signs of someone who deserves a second chance and forgiving them is wiser than rushing to form another ex-friend:
1] Their companionship brings you closer to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala and every time you talk to them, your level of faith Imaan increases.
2] You can learn many useful things and beneficial knowledge from them just as they find your presence valuable.
3] They have done favors and given you gifts, even an offer to give you a ride home, numerous times without expecting you to return their kindness.
4] You're closely related. Cutting off family ties is a wrongdoing which striving Muslims who seek Allah's Love would avoid.
5] You have tons of similarities, goals and interests in common. Why oppose an ambitious Muslim who has the same likes and dislikes as you when you can
Inn-sha-Allah build successful projects together?
To be patient for a moment with someone who means a lot to you is better than a lifetime of regret from reacting impatiently.
~•~
📖 Abu Sa’eed Al-Khudri RadhiAllahu ‘anhu narrated: Some people from the Ansaar asked the Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam and he gave them. Then they asked for charity again and he SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam gave them. Then they asked again and he SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam gave them until all he had was gone. The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “If I had anything, I would not withhold it. Whoever refrains from asking others, then Allah will make him content. Whoever would be independent, then Allah will make him independent. Whoever would be patient, then Allah will make him patient. There is no gift that is better and more comprehensive than patience.”
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6105, Sahih Muslim 1053
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim