Note: Sunnah To Shake Hands When Regularly Meeting Muslims Of The Same Gender

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

📜 Question: Kissing a friend (of the same gender) on their cheek after a long time of separation - is there something wrong with it or no?

📝 Answer: We do not know of any issue with it, although it is better to kiss the area between the person's eyes, nose or the head. Otherwise shaking hands is sufficient. A handshake is enough as a regular form of greeting. It has been narrated about the noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam that he kissed in some occasions, that some of his companions RadhiAllahu 'anhum kissed his head or hand, but shaking hands is enough. And if a person kisses between his friend's eyes or above their nose (A custom among some Arabs when greeting) then it is better than kissing them in their cheek, specially if they arrived from travel or the friends have not seen each other in a long time. 

It was narrated about the noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam that when Ja'far bin Abi Talib RadhiAllahu 'anhu came from Habasha in the year of Khaybar, he kissed him between his eyes. And Abu Bakr As-Siddeeq RadhiAllahu 'anhu when he entered upon 'Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha while she was unwell, he kissed her cheek. So the matter here is vast. A mahram (like the father) can briefly kiss the cheek of his daughter or sister, and kiss the head of his mother or between her eyes, or the head of his grandmother or elder sister, or paternal and maternal aunts, however shaking hands is sufficient. 

Similarly when a person meets his friend, he shakes their right hand, as the noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If one of you meets their brother then let him greet with the salaam, and if there is between them a tree, or wall, or stone, then let them pass by and then greet with the salaam." 

This (frequent exchange of salaams and handshakes) encourages sympathy and harmony, while dispelling estrangement. The noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The Muslim has six rights upon another Muslim: If you meet him, then greet with the salaam; and if he invites you (to a meal or gathering) then respond to his invitation; and if he requests for advice, then advise him; and if he sneezed then thanked Allah, then supplicate (say "YarhamukAllah" meaning 'May Allah have mercy on you'); and if he fell ill, then visit him; and if he died, then follow his funeral."

Anas RadhiAllahu 'anhu reported that the companions of the Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam would shake hands when they met each other, and when they RadhiAllahu 'anhum would arrive from travel they would hug (or embrace) each other. 

Fatima RadhiAllahu 'anha also mentioned that when she entered upon her father, he Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam would walk up to her, take her by the hand, lightly kiss her and seat her beside him; and when he SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam entered upon her, she would walk up to him, take him by the hand, lightly kiss her father SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam and seat him where she was sitting. 

And when Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala accepted the Tawbah (repentance) of Ka'b bin Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu and his companions RadhiAllahu 'anhum, and he went to the Masjid where the noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam was in, with other people around, Talhah bin 'Ubaydullah RadhiAllahu 'anhu (one of the ten who were promised Jannah Paradise) quickly ran to him and shook his hand to congratulate him on having his Tawbah accepted by Allah the Most Forgiving. The companions RadhiAllahu 'anhum shook the hand of the noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam and vice versa. 

Therefore frequently exchanging salaams and offering handshakes are from the Sunnah of the beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam. As for kissing when someone has arrived from travel or from a long period of absence, then 

Inn-sha-Allah there is no problem with kissing the area between their eyes, their forehead or above their head, and among mahrams kissing the cheek or head. 

(Allah the Almighty knows best.)

From the Fataawa of sheikh AbdulAziz Ibn Baz (May Allah have mercy on him. Ameen.)

~•~

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: A man said, “O Messenger of Allah, when a man among us meets his brother or friend, should he bow for him?” The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “No.” The man said, “Should he embrace him and kiss him?” The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “No.” The man said, “Should he shake his hand?” The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Yes."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2728

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Albani

📖 Hudhayfah Ibn Al-Yaman RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, when the believer meets another believer, greets him with peace, and shakes his hand, the sins of them both will shed like leaves falling from a tree."

Source: Al-Muʻjam Al-Awsaṭ 253

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: If the companions of the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam met each other, they would shake hands. If they had returned from a long journey, they would embrace each other.

Source: Al-Mu’jam Al-Awsaṭ 97

Grade: Jayyid (Very good) according to Al-Albani

https://binbaz.org.sa/fatwas/12545/%D8%AD%D9%83%D9%85-%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%A8%D9%8A%D9%84-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B5%D8%AF%D9%8A%D9%82-%D9%81%D9%8A-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%AE%D8%AF

Poem: Three Tips On How Not To Be Overly Sensitive

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Three tips on how not to be overly sensitive, 

To not cry easily when critiqued or insulted, 

And to stay unfazed by rude speech designed to upset: 

Agree if the words are correct. If not, then don't fret. 

Know critics' motives, and believe in Allah's Justice.

~•~

One: If there's truth in the insults, even a small bit, 

Then use it to improve, patiently rise above it, 

Admit you're imperfect just as they too have defects, 

Otherwise if they're lies or they aren't accurate, 

Don't feel bothered one bit by liars' verbal garbage.

~•~

Two: Analyze - did they insult because they're jealous, 

And seeing you get offended keeps them contented? 

Or do they bash and criticize to ease self-hatred, 

Or their rudeness stems from inferiority complex? 

By insecure people's sadness don't be affected.

~•~

Three: Trust Allah and know He heard what your bashers said. 

Note that fault-finders pursue those who strive for success. 

All humans have rivals, including Allah's Prophets, 

So don't assume you're the only one who gets hated.

Call on Allah Who hates those guilty of injustice.

~•~

View insults as blessings that remove past sins you did, 

And take them as tools that encourage self-awareness. 

Don't weep over the slurs of someone who's not perfect. 

Instead, the fact they don't know you kindly acknowledge.

Be glad you're not them bullies ignorant and distressed.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah’s noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.’ Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase 'if only' opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

📖 Ibn Mas'ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam was distributing charity when a man from the Ansaar said, “By Allah, Muhammad did not intend to please Allah with this!” I came to the Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam and told him about it, then anger could be seen on his face. The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Moses (Prophet Musa 'alaihis salaam) was hurt by more than this, yet he remained patient."

In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Who will be just if not Allah and His Messenger?"

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5712, Sahih Muslim 1062

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-be-strong-enough-to-not-be.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/note-tips-on-how-to-avoid-staying-hurt.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/poem-on-how-not-to-be-affected-by.html

Poem: Never Act Like You Know Someone When You Don't Really Know Them

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 To critics who act like sycophants to huge ego, 

Who judge you like they know you when you're not even close, 

Who diss your marriage based on guesses completely false, 

And describe you like they know you when they don't at all:

Don't flatter yourself with lies that attract your downfall.

~•~

Remember this, Only Allah the Almighty knows 

All about His servants, what they conceal and disclose, 

What they dream at night and the kind of thoughts they think of, 

What they tell themselves to encourage or clear sorrow, 

And what their plans are before some of them get disowned.

~•~

You don't know someone if all you do is wave hello, 

Exchange salaams, reluctant smiles or awkward convos, 

If you went out together once, or all you recall 

Are their names and info they shared from their online posts, 

And you've never had talks with them that are deep or long.

~•~

You don't know someone until you've seen them in their homes, 

Saw their true nature without them putting on a show, 

Witnessed their habits that with Allah's Will helped them grow, 

Observed their efforts to serve Allah, heard all their words 

And understood their reasons behind each "yes" and "no".

~•~

If you don't know someone, stop pretending like you know 

Them when you're still strangers and most things they haven't told. 

We're Allah's slaves born with flaws and prone to making faults. 

Before throwing labels at others, inspect yourself. 

Is your heart pure if your morals are low and absurd?

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the most false of tales. Do not seek out faults, do not spy on each other, do not contend with each other, do not envy each other, do not hate each other, and do not turn away from each other. Rather, be servants of Allah as brothers."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5719

Sahih Muslim 2563

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

📖 Abu Barzah Al-Aslami RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "O you who have faith with their tongues but faith has not entered their hearts! Do not backbite the Muslims or seek their faults. Whoever seeks their faults, Allah will seek his faults. And if Allah seeks his faults, He will expose him even in the privacy of his own house."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4880

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man does not accuse another man of wickedness or unbelief except that it will be turned against him if his companion is innocent."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5698

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/poem-what-allah-knows-about-us-matters.html