💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
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🗒️ Question: As an INTJ-A personality type, how would you deal with a group of acquaintances or colleagues who frequently do whatever they can to make you feel "isolated" or "left out"?
📝 Answer: Allahu A'lam. I would:
1] Firstly analyze their actual motives and try to understand the probable reasons behind their strange acts. Are they trying to make me feel "lonely" because once upon a time, in the past, they were the ones who got hurt when I couldn't invite them to several outings or gatherings, and now they're acting cowardly passive-aggressive to get back at me for offending them unintentionally? Or are they just being themselves and have no clue that I'm willing to participate in their discussions and they'd likely welcome me if I show genuine interest in participating?
If they're a bunch of jealous girls or strangers attempting to demotivate me through being obnoxious, why would any decent person with the slightest amount of self-respect wish to associate with such types of insecure individuals? And if they are unaware that I'm readily available to converse with them, I could make the first move if none of them can be described as "toxic", "selfish", "narcissistic", "envious" and "inauthentic".
2] Remember the special few souls whom Allah the Almighty decreed that I'd peacefully connect with and sincerely love for His sake, also appreciating the memorable moments I've had with them - including my dear parents, husband, child/children and siblings.
3] Avoid stalking the social media posts and accounts of all those individuals acting irrationally aloof and unfriendly. Whether they gravitate to me or not, what truly matters is that I'm hopefully one of those steadfast believers whom Allah the Most Loving loves while I strive to maintain polite manners with everybody as much as possible, avoiding oppression and injustice, since I know for sure that I am not an unhappy oversized bully who's desperate to distress others to dispel one's insecurities and despondency.
4] Thank Allah the Most Wise that He Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala didn't make me as miserable as those grown-up yet immature bullies are. One would have to be extremely sorrowful, consistently despising oneself and so unsatisfied with one's lack of inner beauty, that they'd go to extremes to upset those whom they undeniably envy in order to alleviate their sadness triggered by being morally incompetent and ignorant.
5] Remind myself of any generous deed which some of those individuals previously did or recall some of their commendable qualities to lessen the probability of developing unjustified negative emotions against other Muslims who have the same enemy as I do - namely shaytan who gets entertained seeing Muslim communities dispute and Muslim females oppressing other Muslimahs due to despicable envy, an ugly sentiment which the abominable devil himself failed to suppress regarding the Prophet Adam 'alaihis salaam.
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📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated that the Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The Mufarridun (those who like to isolate themselves) have gone ahead (in gaining rewards)." He was asked, "Who are the Mufarridun?" He SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam replied, "Those men and women who remember Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) much."
[Sahih Muslim]
Arabic/English book reference: Book 16, Hadith 1436
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his best friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The souls are troops collected together. They come close upon what they recognize, and they differ upon what they reject."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3109
Sahih Muslim 2638
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim