🗒️ Question: As an INTJ-A personality type, what have you done or usually do when you believe that someone does not deserve to be a close friend but merely an acquaintance or another absolute and permanent stranger?
📝 Answer: Allahu A'lam. Alhamdulillah I've done at least one or more of the following when I have decided to discontinue trying to develop the connection and the person is just a casual acquaintance or neighbor:
1. I unfriended them on Facebook for Allah's sake or if they deleted me from their list of "Facebook friends" I didn't bother asking them, despite being generally direct and straightforward, about their decision to delete because whatever claim or explanation they give is no longer of significance to me.
2. I avoid checking their online profiles, reading their comments thoroughly and browsing around their uploads. So if they go on a trip to upload photos of themselves, desperately wanting me to "envy" what they post, they're simply wasting their time pretending to be all bubbly, uploading pictures and nonsense which I know aren't worthy of my attention.
3. If ever I need advice or require valuable feedback about something important, they wouldn't even be considered as a dependable and trustworthy individual whom I can confide in.
4. Even if I have some free time at a social event or workplace, I'd rather read from the Noble Qur'an, research more about Islam, use my cellphone, take a nap or look at a cat than initiate random conversations with an unreliable, clearly narcissistic or negative person.
5. I'd knowingly refrain from sending them messages to thank them for "favors" or "gifts" given while it's typical for me to immediately express my appreciation for someone's kindness (if I'm aware of how to contact them) as soon as they do something helpful or generous. When it comes to family and relatives though, verbally thanking them face to face and regularly including them in my Du'as are sufficient in my opinion.
Deliberately distancing myself from those whom I sense are not good for me and my faith/Imaan doesn't mean I'm "arrogant"; I don't want anything to do with artificial and badly brought up individuals who fail to inspire me to become a better Muslim and their bad vibes act as distracting obstacles to my goals.
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📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever loves for the sake of Allah (The Almighty), hates for the sake of Allah, gives for the sake of Allah, and withholds for the sake of Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) has perfected the faith."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4681
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his best friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is not stung from the same hole twice."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5782
Sahih Muslim 2998
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
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