๐ In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
๐ If I had accepted the marriage proposal of this Filipino guy (also Maranao) who was employed in Madinah when I was about fourteen years old, I probably would've enjoyed the blessings of regularly praying in the Masjid An-Nabawiy and could've delivered packages of dates to relatives in the Philippines whenever I could. But I declined his proposal because he looked too baby-faced and was around my height.
If I agreed to marrying this Pakistani guy from a respectable family and who was aspiring to memorize the whole of the Noble Qur'an while I was around sixteen or seventeen years old, I'd probably be residing somewhere in Pakistan by now and be more capable of traveling to Saudi Arabia whenever I wanted to perform 'Umrah and Hajj. But being ignorant of the virtues of marrying for Allah's sake and several Islamic rulings back then, I found it easy to reject his marriage proposals just because I mistakenly thought he was "too shy" and "incompatible" with me.
If I eagerly said yes to the marriage proposal of one of my male "childhood friends" whose parents have been well acquainted with my parents (Allah yarhamhuma. Ameen.) ever since he was a baby, born in eastern Saudi Arabia, I probably would've enjoyed the affection of a spouse whom I used to play with often since we were younger kids. But I chose to reject his marriage proposal because I ignorantly disliked how he was around two years younger than me, as I preferred to marry an older and supposedly more mature guy.
If my dear parents didn't decline (on my behalf) the marriage proposal of a Filipino guy staying in USA, there's a likelihood that I could've been one of those so-called modernized Muslims with materialistic tendencies.
Alhamdulillah what Allah the Most Wise decreed is that I become the first wife of one of my male cousins who is currently working in the medical field. ๐ Through this marriage Alhamdulillah I've learned to:
1] Understand the wisdom behind polygyny.
2] Motivate other wives to maintain fierce loyalty and patience for Allah's sake whether they're in a monogamous or polygynous marriage.
3] Reassure other Muslimahs that it's possible to fall in love with your male cousin and become his loving wife, with Allah's Will, in the future.
4] Encourage Maranao families to not disapprove of a man's decision if he wishes to marry a woman from another tribe or who is still new to Islam.
5] Inspire Muslim spouses to remain grateful, patient and resilient for Allah's sake throughout marriage life even if you can't be physically together with your spouse 24/7. Eternal bliss can be enjoyed in Jannah Paradise where its inhabitants will never go through sorrow, remorse and heartbreaks.
✅ To never feel regretful of staying married to your spouse:
1] As many times as you can remind yourself that you accepted this marriage sincerely to please Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, and you'd do whatever is necessary to protect this bond from being disrupted by the envious archenemy shaytan.
2] Persistently appreciate all of the pleasant things which your husband has done and recall his admirable qualities.
3] Be of the opinion that it is a lot better to continue being a patient wife while your child/kids can still enjoy the love of a caring father, despite his busyness or frequent absence due to polygyny, than being a struggling single mom whose kids/child may oftentimes wonder if they're the cause of the separation or feel bad that other children still have a mom and dad while their family is disunited.
4] Genuinely loving your husband for Allah's sake much more than his body, appearance, income, profession and your ego can make the complications and trials in marriage more manageable and rewarding.
5] Imagine shaytan as an irritating prankster on a prank show, desperate to see you and your husband split up because he jealously despises it when the descendants of Prophet Adam 'alaihis salaam (human beings) show signs of happiness in lawful ways. Don't give him the satisfaction of watching you argue and seeing you allow pride/kibr to be the reason why you and your soulmate separate.
~•~
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If someone proposes marriage to you whose religion and character satisfies you, then you should accept it. If you do not do so, there will be trials (fitna / fitan) on the earth and the spread of corruption."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1084
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Every one of you will have his supplications answered, as long as he is not impatient and says: 'I have supplicated but I was not answered.'"
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The (Muslim) servant will continue to have his supplications answered as long as he does not ask for sin or cutting family ties and he is not impatient." They said, "O Messenger of Allah, what is its impatience?" The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "He says: 'I have supplicated again and again, but I have not seen an answer.' He becomes frustrated with that and gives up supplicating."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5981
Sahih Muslim 2735
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2664
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/note-why-muslims-who-love-allah.html
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/07/note-on-topic-of-marrying-early-in-islam.html
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/02/note-what-i-have-learned-from-marrying.html
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-while-not-every-woman-gets-to.html
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/12/note-stay-contented-with-love-story.html
