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๐ Question: Since I was born with a facial disfigurement, many of my classmates make fun of me for not looking as pretty as them. Should I leave this Madrasah (Islamic school) because I'm being bullied for the way I look?
๐ Answer: The reason why Allah the Almighty created people differently, with some individuals looking "naturally beautiful", others who appear "average" while Allah made several others disabled, is to test their faith/Imaan, see who among them would contentedly accept Allah's Qadr/Destiny with patience, and who would behave arrogantly for having good looks so their beauty is misused for the wrong purpose.
Whenever you feel like you're not good enough, remember those who have less than you. A person who is slightly cross-eyed must remember those who are blind. A Muslimah whose face isn't as cute as her other sisters' should be content that at least her heart which holds firm faith/Imaan isn't disfigured. A man who is a "dwarf" or who isn't as tall as many men are must be contented that at least he can still walk on two legs while others move about on a wheelchair and many are bedridden. People with a special skin condition that sets them apart from those who are "normal" should thank Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala that at least they have seeing, hearing and sensing abilities. A woman can still feel beautiful on the inside if she has a lot of self-esteem, strong faith/Imaan and contentment with Allah's Decree even if she has a serious case of acne.
There's always something good you can appreciate in yourself if you look deeply and observe. Allah the Most Merciful even stated in the Noble Qur'an that if you were to count His favors upon you, you would never be able to enumerate them because they're too numerous to count. One of the favors that Allah gave you, besides being a Muslim who's on the pathway to Jannah, is having the eagerness or enthusiasm to learn more about your Deen Islam. Allah gives wealth and good looks to whomever He Wills, while He exclusively grants Islam only to those whom He loves. The fact that you're studying in an Islamic school is a good sign that Allah loves you. Are you going to stop attending an Islamic class just because some insecure people make fun of the way you look? Are you there to study about Islam to become closer to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, or are you going to quit because some of His servants who despise themselves keep bullying you? Prior to even thinking of quitting, make an attempt, without intending to cause unnecessary trouble, to calmly confront those classmates who tease you for your appearance. If they claim "you're ugly", say in the dialect which they understand, "Alhamdulillah at least my heart and manners aren't ugly." or "I'm not a mirror. You can check your reflection someplace else and say that phrase again." or "I'm not competing for miss universe. Since when did you hire yourself to be my judge?" or "Are you seriously that miserable that you feel the need to make others feel bad about themselves? I pity you." or "What about you? You think you're pretty with that ugly personality and lack of good morals?"
You can also complain to those who are authorized to take disciplinary measures regarding students who are guilty of bullying. Bullies usually harass their victims when they're jealous of them or sense that their presence is a threat to their well-being. Maybe it's not your looks that bother them but they're envious of how you're smart, how your parents are loving and you come from a good family.
If you decide to leave the Madrasah due to a number of immature students, continue learning more about Islam online and by reading reliable Islamic books based on the Noble Qur'an and the Sunnah of the beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam. Also read about one of his companions named Julaybib RadhiAllahu 'anhu who was one of the believers loved and valued by the noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam.
Remind yourself that Allah the Most Merciful doesn't judge you by how you look on the outside but what your heart carries of faith/Imaan and Ikhlaas/sincerity on the inside. Just because you're not as good-looking as those famous celebrities many of whom undergo cosmetic surgery to look "flawless" doesn't mean you're not worthy of being treated well as a human being. The more content you are with Allah as your Rabb (Lord), Islam as your religion and Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam as Allah's final Messenger, and the more confidence you have in being a striving Muslim, the more you won't care about how Allah's servants view you.
Jannah Paradise is the place where we can attain complete happiness and perfection. This world is a platform of temporary examinations which we can pass by trying our best to stay connected to Allah until He grants us Jannah's entrance. In Paradise all your past worries, concerns and worldly problems can be forgotten. So whenever you go through any difficulty in life and encounter troublesome individuals, remember every situation is temporal. It may not always be easy to have patience at times, but you need to push yourself to have Sabr for Allah's sake if you wish to survive. When some people mistreat you and misbehave, be glad Alhamdulillah that you're not them - you're not the one who's bullying and earning Muslims' sins. Occasionally encountering disrespectful individuals who treat you badly doesn't imply you're a bad person, but their misbehavior is a chance for you to be well-trained at exercising patience, to have inner strength by practicing to be more forgiving, and to understand that their rudeness indicates how unfortunate they are for having a lousy upbringing or for their inability to apply what they were taught about basic etiquettes. Confident people don't bring others down, but uplift and provide encouragement. Only those who are unhappy with themselves are inclined to bullying.
Strive to be the best Muslim you can be for Allah's sake. Instead of using up your energy in wondering why some people criticize you for your appearance, focus on your mission to be with Allah in Jannah Heaven by doing whatever good deeds you can with sincere intention.
Don't let critics become a distraction, but a motivation for you to rely on Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala more, and to keep striving with rewarding patience.
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah does not look at your appearance or wealth, but rather He looks at your hearts and actions."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2564
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
