💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
💌 A sister in Islam asked if it is okay for her to not directly apologize to someone she wronged because she's probably either too shy to approach her or she is afraid that her apology might get rejected.
If you've done something wrong to another Muslim, whether you gossiped about them previously or stolen an item that belonged to them, and you're genuinely sorry for what you did but you don't have the courage to face them, you can:
1] Send a direct message or voice message to that person's inbox, informing them that you are really sorry for hurting them and
Inn-sha-Allah you promise you'll try your best to avoid repeating the offense.
2] E-mail or write a letter to make sure they read your letter of apology.
3] Talk to several of that person's close friends or trusted relatives, requesting them to speak to the person you want to apologize to. The more they hear news of you being apologetic and remorseful for what you did through reliable individuals, the more they are likely to let go of the grudge and contact you.
4] If you've stolen something from them for whatever reason and you are unable to return it to them because you don't know their exact location or they moved to a different area, you can do charity on their behalf with the amount that you can estimate is equal to the price of the stolen item. For example if you stole one of their abayas, you can buy a new abaya of a similar quality and give it to a Muslimah who needs it. Your intention is to do charity on behalf of that person whose abaya you stole. Do it to compensate for stealing, then try your utmost not to steal from anyone again.
5] A sign that you're truthfully sorry for mistreating a Muslim is positively changing the way you deal with them. If they were offended by a hurtful joke you said, stop making offensive jokes about them. If they got annoyed by you contemptuously copying their manner of speaking, voice or overall personality, then quit being a childish nuisance to them. If you used to spread false rumors about them, inform everybody that the accusations you told weren't true in a public statement on your social media accounts or to the group of friends who listened to your gossip.
6] The next time that person is being badly spoken about by somebody else, take initiative to back them up and defend their honor, not only because it's the proper thing to do, but also as a compensation for backbiting about them in the past.
Positive transformation, regretting what you did, and treating that person much better than before are signs that your apology is sincere, whether or not the hurt person forgives you or chooses to distance themselves because they're not strong enough yet to forgive. What is important is your eagerness to apologize, knowing that all humans will be brought to account for their actions and sayings on the Day of Judgment.
7] Pray to Allah the Most Forgiving to forgive your mistakes and the Muslim whom you formerly mistreated. Beg Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala for Him to soften your heart and theirs, and that Allah blesses you with beautiful character so you avoid deliberately offending other Muslims in the future.
Being blessed with a heart that is free from despising other Muslims and not obsessing over people who can't truly connect with you are among the factors which lead to serenity and having peace of mind.
~*~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever wrongs his brother in his honor or anything else should resolve the matter today before it cannot be resolved with gold and silver coins. If he has good deeds to his credit, they will be taken from him according to the measure of his injustice. If he has no good deeds left, he will bear the evil deeds of the one he has oppressed."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 2317
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:
"Charity does not decrease wealth, no one forgives except that Allah increases his honor, and no one humbles himself for the sake of Allah except that Allah raises his status."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2588, Grade: Sahih
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam was upon the pulpit and he said:
"Be merciful to others and you will receive mercy. Forgive others and Allah will forgive you."
Source: Musnad Ahmad 7001, Grade: Sahih