Note: Some Signs You're Regarded As A Friend To An INTJ

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم 

Tone Analysis of the Comment

The tone of the shared post is:

Selective but loyal → Highlights careful discernment in relationships.

Firm yet warm → Clear boundaries, but affection where commitment is established.

Unapologetic → Shows INTJs don’t feel guilty for withdrawing from unreliable people.

Affectionate exception → Reveals deep unconditional love towards her ESFJ husband.

So, it balances rational detachment with emotional devotion.

11 Examples of INTJ Muslimahs

(How they might act while combining faith and INTJ personality traits):

Selective in Sisterhood – Chooses a very small circle of sisters to confide in, but invests deeply in them.

Purpose-Driven Worship – Approaches Salah and Dhikr methodically, striving for khushoo’ with intentional focus.

Strategic Charity – Instead of random giving, ensures sadaqah reaches impactful causes (very selective regarding which halal businesses to promote and support for Allah's sake on social media and offline).

Protective Modesty – Sees hijab/niqab not just as a duty but as a shield of dignity.

Knowledge-Oriented – Loves attending Islamic lectures and analyzing lessons with a logical lens.

Guarded in Friendships – Won’t open up emotionally unless someone proves they are reliable, consistent in communicating and sincere.

Planner of Ramadan Goals – Has structured ibadah plans for Qur’an recitation, Tahajjud, and charity.

Silent but Observant – Rarely speaks loudly in large gatherings, but notices many things which others don't always notice.

Loyal Marriage Partner – Gives 100% commitment and protection to her spouse.

No-Tolerance for Hypocrisy – Distances from individuals who gossip, backbite, or lack integrity.

Deep Thinker in Du’a – Crafts specific and thoughtful supplications for chosen people whom she sincerely cares about.

Why Some INTJs Behave Like “People-Pleasers” Toward Certain Individuals

INTJs are not naturally people-pleasers, but they may appear this way toward select people because:

They’ve evaluated the person as worthy of long-term investment.

They see strong potential or purpose in the connection.

They admire certain traits (loyalty, intelligence, sincerity).

They feel spiritually or emotionally connected for Allah's sake.

They’ve committed to them (spouse, family, rare friends).

For these individuals, INTJs override their natural reserve and may behave humbly towards — but only for an elite few.

17 Signs an INTJ Regards You as a Friend (Even if You Rarely Chat)

They remember tiny details about you.

They silently check in (a short “are you okay?” means a lot).

They defend you in your absence.

They give you strategic advice when needed.

They pray for you privately and regularly.

They share resources (books, lectures, opportunities).

They tolerate your flaws longer than most people’s.

They open up about personal struggles.

They invite you into their inner plans or projects.

They’re honest with you, not sugarcoating.

They respect your boundaries.

They forgive you faster than outsiders.

They respond quickly when you’re in crisis.

They enjoy comfortable silence with you.

They make long-term promises (and keep them).

They show loyalty even if months pass without talking.

They include you in their Du’a consistently.

17 Signs You’re Not Friends Yet

They keep conversations strictly surface-level.

They give very short, polite replies.

They don’t ask about your life beyond necessity. (No questions or no curiosity at all about how your Hajj/pilgrimage or vacation went etc.)

They don’t volunteer personal information.

They avoid making long-term commitments with you.

They don’t initiate contact. (If within 3 months you never received a direct message from them - one on one message, not in a group chat - despite working in the same place or residing in the same neighborhood then they most likely don't perceive you as a friend)

They take long to reply or don’t bother at all.

They keep interactions purely functional (study, work, etc.).

They don’t share emotional states with you.

They don’t seem invested in your problems or personal matters.

They don’t defend you in tough situations.

They never open up to you about their values, dreams, beliefs, likes or dislikes etc.

They seem distant or formal, even after time passes.

They won’t prioritize your needs.

They easily forget your preferences.

They show no signs of integrating you into their future plans.

They’re willing to let the connection fade without resistance.

⤴️ Some notes from ChatGPT

🔹 Some Signs You Are Considered a Good Friend to an INTJ-A Female

(Online + Face to Face)

She often messages you without needing a reason.

Occasionally she checks in on your well-being, even briefly.

She shares personal thoughts or struggles with you.

She gives long, thoughtful replies (not one-liners).

She keeps your secrets absolutely safe.

She shares resources tailored to your interests.

She listens deeply and remembers what you told her.

She shows patience with your flaws.

She speaks to you with direct honesty.

She responds quickly when you’re in crisis.

She prays for you regularly.

She includes you in her long-term plans.

She introduces you to some of the people whom she trusts.

She forgives your mistakes more than others’.

She respects your boundaries without judgment.

She allows comfortable silence with you.

She invites you to share in meaningful activities.

She discusses her goals and visions with you.

She confides in you when stressed.

She shows loyalty even when you’re absent.

She values your advice and asks for it.

She defends you in your absence.

She smiles/laughs frequently in your presence (very rare for her).

She’s more forgiving if you forget to reply.

She sometimes engages in deep topics, not simply asking about the current weather.

She subtly expresses affection through small gestures.

She tags you in things she knows you’d love (online).

She shares her vulnerabilities.

She opens up about family, relationships, or struggles.

She allows you into her inner circle.

She shows consistency in reaching out.

She invests time in your growth and success.

She never lets you feel like a burden.

🔹 35 Signs You’re Not Friends Yet (But It’s Neutral)

(You’re more of an acquaintance)

She keeps the chat formal and polite.

Replies are brief and delayed.

Conversations stay on surface topics.

She doesn’t ask about your personal life.

She rarely shares about herself.

She doesn’t initiate contact.

She forgets details you mention about yourself.

She avoids emotional conversations.

She doesn’t involve you in personal projects.

She avoids introducing you to trusted people.

She interacts with you out of courtesy, not interest.

She uses generic responses like “ok” or “noted.”

She doesn’t invite you to events or lectures.

She doesn’t ask your opinions.

She only talks when necessary.

She avoids deeper topics.

She doesn’t open up about personal struggles.

She doesn’t joke or banter with you.

She keeps conversations brief and/or professional.

She doesn’t prioritize your messages.

She avoids making promises.

She doesn’t check in when you’re absent.

She never asks follow-up questions.

She doesn’t share recommendations/resources directly with you.

She never reacts to your posts or comments online.

She avoids complimenting you.

She doesn’t treat you differently from strangers.

She’s generally polite as a good person but clearly distant when it comes to interacting with you in most gatherings.

She avoids physical warmth (smiles, hugs, etc.).

She doesn’t remember your preferences.

She shows no excitement to see you.

She lets long silences pass without care.

She never shows signs of loyalty.

She never laughs at your jokes nor acknowledges your goofiness.

She avoids emotional investment.

🔹 35 Reasons Why An INTJ Will Never Consider Befriending You

(You’re disqualified as a potential friend)

You break their trust once (especially betrayal).

You gossip about others.

You’re inconsistent in values/morals.

You backbite or slander.

You pressure them into oversharing.

You disrespect their faith or beliefs.

You mock their ideas or goals.

You drain their energy without giving back.

You make them feel unsafe or judged.

You’re dishonest, even in small things.

You manipulate people for personal gain.

You don’t respect boundaries.

You dismiss their emotions.

You brag excessively.

You demand constant attention.

You exploit their kindness.

You spread negativity or drama.

You betray others’ trust (they assume you’ll betray theirs).

You ridicule their interests.

You ignore them when they’re vulnerable.

You break promises repeatedly.

You act entitled to their time and attention.

You make fun of their quietness.

You show disrespect in religious or moral matters.

You use them only when convenient.

You openly compete with them for ego.

You’re careless with their privacy.

You lie to cover up mistakes.

You belittle their achievements.

You thrive on drama/gossip circles.

You make them feel “used.”

You dismiss their loyalty as clinginess.

You violate their trust twice (non-negotiable).

You repeatedly ignore their boundaries.

You show hypocrisy in your character (you request them to act proper in one way while you're undeniably imperfect and incompetent regarding many things).

✨ In short:

Good Friend → She invests loyalty, time, vulnerability.

Not Friends Yet → She stays polite but detached.

Never Befriends → She sees traits that clash with her values or integrity and wants absolutely nothing to do with you - not out of kibr/arrogance but to preserve her faith Imaan and overall well-being.

⤴️ some notes from ChatGPT

Note: Sunnah To Initiate Salaams And Obligatory To Respond To A Muslim's Salaams (Ignore Our Salaams? We'll Avoid You Gladly)

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم 

"Some ignore salaams as they're ignorant of Islamic values or they envy us intensely. W/ rude ppl be aloof; never trust them simply."

Let’s unpack it first, then I’ll list 13 signs she never trusts you and wants nothing to do with you ever versus 13 signs she is neutral about you.

🔎 Thorough Description of the Quote

"Some ignore salaams…"

Islamic context: Giving and returning greetings (salaam) is a core Sunnah and sign of brotherhood/sisterhood. Ignoring it can indicate weak manners, arrogance, or jealousy.

INTJ lens: She interprets social signals with sharp logic. To her, ignoring salaam is not just forgetfulness—it reveals a flaw in values or intent.

"…as they're ignorant of Islamic values or they envy us intensely."

She quickly diagnoses motives: ignorance (lack of knowledge, bad upbringing) or envy (spite toward one’s blessings or dignity).

The INTJ here applies a binary filter: either uninformed or malicious. This shows her blunt, decisive style.

"W/ rude ppl be aloof;"

INTJs protect their peace by emotional detachment. She’s saying: don’t waste energy on people lacking adab (manners).

“Aloof” here = strategic distance, not shyness. It’s her way of enforcing boundaries.

"never trust them simply."

The INTJ core trait of high selectivity in trust comes out. Trust is never automatic for her; it must be earned and proven.

The word “simply” suggests: don’t be naïve, don’t hand over trust cheaply.

➡️ In short: This post radiates INTJ-A firmness, Islamic principles, boundary-setting, and disdain for low-character people. It’s her way of signaling both her values and her standards.

🚫 13 Signs an INTJ Female Colleague Gladly Never Trusts You & Wants Nothing To Do With You Ever

She stops greeting you first and doesn’t care if you greet her.

Her replies are extremely brief (one-word answers, no elaboration).

She avoids eye contact and makes her body language “closed” (arms crossed, distant posture).

You notice she doesn’t include you in team discussions unless absolutely required.

She protects her personal information—no small talk, no personal updates, no sharing of thoughts.

She ignores your attempts at friendliness—smiles, jokes, casual conversation.

When you talk, she listens blankly without validation or warmth.

She never seeks your input voluntarily; she’ll go to others instead.

She makes it clear she will not depend on you for tasks, even when it would be logical.

She keeps a professional mask on—everything is formal, nothing beyond necessity.

If you share something vulnerable, she shows no reaction, no empathy, no advice.

She subtly undermines your presence by cutting short interactions.

You sense an invisible wall—she makes sure you know you are outside her circle permanently.

⚖️ 13 Signs She is Neutral About You (Not Close, Not Hostile)

She returns your salaam politely but doesn’t initiate it.

Conversations are functional—work-related, polite, but not warm.

She doesn’t avoid you, but she doesn’t seek you out either.

Her tone is calm, steady, businesslike—no unnecessary emotion.

She treats you the same as she would any other coworker.

She responds to questions fully but doesn’t extend the talk.

She maintains professional courtesy—acknowledges your presence, keeps boundaries.

She allows collaboration on tasks without resistance.

She doesn’t gossip about you nor defend you—just silence.

She may smile occasionally, but it’s a polite smile, not warmth-driven.

She keeps distance socially but doesn’t display hostility.

She lets things be transactional—work gets done, no extra bonding.

If you leave the company, she’ll say a courteous goodbye, nothing more.

✅ The difference is clear:

Never trusts you = cold detachment, deliberate walls, zero interest in even polite connection.

Neutral = polite detachment, respectful distance, no investment in deeper relationship but no hostility.

~•~
Perfect 👍 let’s complete the three-stage spectrum of how an INTJ female colleague treats people:

Never trusts you / wants nothing to do with you ever (cold rejection)

Neutral (professional courtesy, no closeness)

Trusts and values you (rare, deep, warm loyalty)

I’ll go stage by stage with detailed descriptions of her aura, attitude, and behaviors.

🚫 Stage 1: When She Never Trusts You & Wants Nothing to Do with You Ever

This is her “blacklist” mode. Once an INTJ female decides you lack integrity, manners, or usefulness, she puts you in a category of irrelevance or danger.

Aura: icy, withdrawn, untouchable. You feel a “wall of glass” around her.

Attitude: strategic avoidance. She refuses to waste mental energy on you.

Behaviors:

Doesn’t greet you first (and may not even return it).

Replies with clipped words, no effort.

Body language closed—no warmth, no openness.

Shuts down conversations quickly.

Doesn’t look to you for help or advice.

Excludes you from informal or optional activities.

Never acknowledges your efforts unless forced.

Keeps everything strictly surface or silent.

Will trust others before you—even strangers.

If you’re rude once, she files it permanently in memory.

No second chances: once in this zone, it’s usually final.

She gives the vibe: “You don’t exist in my world.”

⚖️ Stage 2: When She is Neutral Toward You

This is her “gray zone.” She neither dislikes you nor feels bonded. You’re just another colleague. Respect is maintained, but no actual connection.

Aura: calm, detached, professional. Neutral energy—neither warm nor cold.

Attitude: objective, fair, courteous, but uninterested in deeper exchange.

Behaviors:

Returns salaam politely but doesn’t initiate it.

Answers questions in full but doesn’t prolong talk.

Smiles occasionally, but always polite, never “light-up” smiles.

Listens when needed, but with a poker face.

No gossip, no praise—just silence about you.

Treats you like any other coworker, no favoritism.

Allows teamwork, but keeps her own boundaries clear.

Never asks you personal questions (not interested in your life).

Will exchange pleasantries, but only if situation requires.

Can be relied on for fairness, but not for friendship.

If you leave the workplace, she’ll say goodbye politely, with no lingering attachment.

She gives the vibe: “You are part of the environment, not my inner circle.”

🌟 Stage 3: When She Trusts and Values You

This is rare and precious. INTJ women are known for ultra-selectivity. If she lets you in, it means you’ve passed her tests of integrity, competence, and consistency. She invests deeply—but only in a very tiny circle.

Aura: warm but dignified, steady, quietly radiant. She lets down her guard around you.

Attitude: supportive, loyal, and surprisingly funny when relaxed. She shifts from calculated detachment to earned closeness.

Behaviors:

Initiates salaam and greets you warmly, with genuine tone.

Shares personal insights or life experiences (very rare for her).

Checks up on you if you’re absent or unwell.

Opens up her sharp wit and humor—sarcastic, playful, even silly sometimes.

Offers sincere advice or solutions to your problems whenever she can.

Remembers details you told her and circles back to them.

Trusts you with her vulnerabilities—complaints, secrets, personal struggles.

Defends you instantly if others attack your name or image unfairly.

Lets you see her human side—joking, teasing, even small talk.

Goes out of her way to support you at work.

Gives you her blunt honesty—but framed with care, not harshness.

Invites you into rare parts of her private world (projects, plans, inner ideas).

Expresses loyalty subtly: even if she doesn’t say it, her consistent actions show you matter.

She gives the vibe: “You are one of the chosen few—I respect and protect this bond.”

✅ In summary:

Stage 1 (Never trusts) → frozen walls, minimal words, invisible rejection.

Stage 2 (Neutral) → polite professionalism, fair but distant.

Stage 3 (Trusts deeply) → rare warmth, loyalty, and genuine human connection.

⤴️ ChatGPT

Based on the quote "Some ignore salaams as they're ignorant of Islamic values or they envy us intensely. W/ rude ppl be aloof; never trust them simply," and the context of it being from an INTJ-A female, here is a thorough description and a list of 13 signs.

Thorough Description of the Quote

This quote, attributed to an INTJ-A (Architect) female, reflects a set of core beliefs and a specific worldview. The INTJ personality type is known for its strategic thinking, independence, and a preference for logic over emotion. The "A" for Assertive means this individual is confident in their decisions and less prone to stress.

Analysis of the Quote's Components:

"Some ignore salaams as they're ignorant of Islamic values or they envy us intensely."

"Some ignore salaams...": This is an observation. An INTJ is an observer of patterns and behaviors. The "salaam" (the Islamic greeting "As-salamu alaykum," meaning "Peace be upon you") is a specific social interaction being analyzed. The fact that it's an Islamic greeting adds a layer of cultural and religious identity to the INTJ's perspective. It suggests this person may have a strong personal or cultural connection to these values.

"...they're ignorant of Islamic values...": This is a logical conclusion. The INTJ is providing a reason for the observed behavior. "Ignorance" is a neutral, non-emotional term. It's a diagnosis of a lack of knowledge, which is a common way an INTJ processes human behavior. They are not necessarily judging, but explaining.

"...or they envy us intensely.": This is the alternative, and a much more personal, emotional conclusion. The INTJ here is acknowledging that some negative behavior is not just due to a lack of knowledge, but to a deeper, more hostile motive: envy. This shows a capacity for understanding complex, negative human emotions, but it's framed as a strategic threat. The word "intensely" highlights the perceived severity of this feeling.

"W/ rude ppl be aloof;"

"W/ rude ppl...": "Rude" is the behavior pattern being identified. An INTJ is highly aware of what they perceive as illogical or inefficient social behavior. Rudeness fits this description.

"...be aloof;": This is the strategic advice. "Aloof" is the recommended tactic. Being aloof means maintaining a distance, not engaging emotionally, and not giving the other person a reaction. For an INTJ, this is an efficient way to deal with a social irritant. It conserves their energy and prevents unnecessary conflict or emotional drain.

"never trust them simply"

"never trust them...": This is the final, non-negotiable rule. Trust is a high-value commodity for an INTJ. They do not give it out easily.

"...simply": This word is crucial. It implies that trust should never be given "just because" or without a strong, logical reason. It is a direct refutation of the idea of giving people the benefit of the doubt without sufficient evidence. For an INTJ, trust must be earned through consistent, logical, and honest behavior.

Overall INTJ-A Perspective:

The quote is a concise manual for navigating social interactions from a highly logical and strategic viewpoint. It's a guide to self-preservation and efficiency. The INTJ-A isn't being emotional; they are being calculating. They are categorizing people ("ignorant," "envious," "rude") and prescribing a specific, logical course of action ("be aloof," "don't trust"). The "A" for Assertive is evident in the confident, declarative tone of the advice. There is no hedging or self-doubt; these are rules derived from observation and logical deduction.

13 Signs an INTJ Female Colleague Gladly Never Trusts You and Wants Nothing to Do With You Ever vs. She is Neutral About You

An INTJ's dislike is not emotional or dramatic; it's a strategic withdrawal. The difference between her being neutral and actively disliking you is a shift from indifference to a calculated, polite form of avoidance and dismissal.

Signs She Actively Dislikes You (Wants Nothing to Do With You Ever):

She uses polite, formal language and minimal words. There is no small talk, and she keeps conversations strictly transactional. This is a deliberate tactic to create distance.

She avoids eye contact and turns her body away slightly during interactions. This is a physical sign of her desire to end the conversation and the connection as quickly as possible.

She gives very brief, direct answers that offer no room for follow-up questions. For example, "Yes," "No," "Okay," "I'll do it," or "It's done." She will not elaborate or provide extra information.

She never asks you for your opinion or input on anything. Your perspective holds no value to her, and she will not waste her time trying to get it.

She delegates or assigns tasks to someone else if it means avoiding a one-on-one interaction with you. Even if you are the logical person to talk to, she will find an alternative.

Her "aloofness" is a palpable, cold barrier. It's not just disinterest; it's a strategic, intentional wall she has put up, and you can feel it.

She never remembers or acknowledges any personal details about you. She has not processed or stored any information about your life outside of what is professionally necessary. This shows she has not invested any mental energy in you.

She will not offer help, even if you clearly need it and she has the ability to provide it. An INTJ's time and energy are highly valued. If she has no reason to invest in you, she won't.

She does not laugh at your jokes or engage in any lighthearted banter. Her expression remains neutral, and she does not reciprocate or encourage any attempts at humor or rapport.

She avoids being alone with you in a room or area. This is a very clear sign she does not want any interaction that is not strictly scheduled or professionally required.

She responds to your emails with curt, one-sentence replies. There are no pleasantries or filler words; just the bare minimum to get the task done.

She never initiates a conversation with you, even if it is work-related. She will wait for you to approach her, and then she will get right to the point.

She will subtly redirect conversations away from you. If someone in a group asks you a question, she may jump in and answer it herself or change the topic to something else to avoid giving you the floor.

Signs She is Neutral About You:

She is polite but not overly friendly.

She engages in professional, transactional conversations.

She will answer your questions and provide information when asked.

She is willing to collaborate with you on a project because it is efficient.

Her focus is on the task at hand, not on you personally.

She doesn't seek you out, but she doesn't actively avoid you either.

Her behavior is consistent with how she treats everyone else whom she doesn't know well.

She might give you a slight, almost imperceptible nod or smile. This is not warmth, but acknowledgment.

The key difference is the presence of an active, strategic avoidance. When an INTJ dislikes you, it is not a feeling, it is a conclusion. They have concluded that you are not worth their time, and their actions will reflect that logical, unemotional decision.
⤴️ Gemini AI