💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
🗒️ Nine instances when you have a right to reject a marriage proposal from a married guy:
1] If you see yourself eagerly planning to replace his first wife through sorcery (note: practicing black magic / witchcraft is a major sin which Muslims must avoid) or gradual efforts to convince the man to leave his first wife.
2] If there's another Muslim who already spoke to your parents or guardians regarding his willingness to marry you, and his current status is single. It may be better to accept the marriage proposal of one who has never been married previously than become somebody's second wife while being seen by some individuals as a "homewrecker".
3] If you are aware that the man proposing is financially struggling with many debts and a large family to care for. You don't want to be an additional problem when he still has lots of problems to solve.
4] If you, without a doubt, can guarantee or confirm that you and his first wife won't get along, because of previous misunderstandings or the clear differences in your attitude and personalities bring about conflict.
5] If the only ones who are enthusiastic about you marrying the guy are his first wife, his relatives, and your family. It is better to remain single, waiting for a sincere spouse in this world or in Jannah Paradise, than to dutifully wed a man whose main reason for marrying you is to modify your marital status or fill the "empty space" which your late husband or ex-husband left.
6] If the guy's belief / 'Aqeedah is different from yours, if he's guilty of bid'ah, or it is known that he was involved in multiple crimes which shouldn't have anything to do with you.
7] If you're okay with accepting the guy's marriage proposal but his first wife happens to be your sister, half-sister, or foster sister. You can marry your sister's husband only after she has passed away, not during her lifetime. Allah the Almighty knows best.
8] If the guy proposing requests you to do whatever you can to ensure the wedding is kept as a secret, afraid that his first wife may find out. Better to offer food regularly to stray cats that are still scared of you than spend your future with a coward.
9] If you sense that the man is pursuing you mainly because his first wife is infertile, and he can't promise that he'll try his best to treat all his wives as fairly as he can. What if he files for divorce after you give birth to some children and he takes custody of the kids while he keeps his first wife?
✅ When can you say yes to a married man's marriage proposal?
1] If you've prayed two Sunnah Rak'ahs of Salat Al-Istikhaara, carefully analyzed the pros and cons of marrying the guy, and you feel ready to be his second wife without regret, and without any intention to separate the man from his first wife.
2] If you admire the man's strong faith/Imaan and pleasant personality, while his first wife made it very clear that she's okay with him marrying you, and they're not going through financial difficulties.
3] If you have been single for many years and this marriage proposal is the first ever you've received. Maybe it is a response from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala to one of your frequent supplications. Pray two Rak'ahs of Salat Al-Istikhaara before finalizing your decision.
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📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If someone proposes marriage to you whose religion and character satisfies you, then you should accept it. If you do not do so, there will be trials on the earth and the spread of corruption."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1084
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Thawban RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The best wealth is a tongue that remembers Allah, a grateful heart, and a believing wife to help one in his faith."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3094
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
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