๐ In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
๐️ Struggling with recurrent waswaas or evil whisperings from shaytan doesn't always indicate that you're a bad Muslim.
The closer you are to Allah the Almighty, the more shaytan will desperately attempt to distract you from fulfilling your mission to obey Allah. Thus the cunning devil (shaytan) does whatever he can to tempt you to commit acts of disobedience. shaytan's evil suggestions can come in different ways, he may whisper and strive to persuade you:
1) To give up being a Muslim when you find some religious actions too tiring, because you frequently struggle with repeating the number of times you perform wudhu/ablution, find difficulty in memorizing a Du'a/supplication or you're unable to concentrate fully while praying.
2) To carry out an evil deed after triggering some intense emotions – to kill somebody when you're overcome by anger or your ego has been threatened, to commit suicide when going through a temporary phase of depression, to steal when you're overwhelmed by jealousy or dissatisfaction with Allah's Qadr/Decree, to flirt with non-mahrams and pursue haraam relationships when you're attracted to them, to disrespect your parents when your pride overtakes you claiming that their strictness is "oppression" etc.
3) To change the nature of something that Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala created or to be discontent with how Allah the Most Wise made you – to feel that you're in the "wrong" body so you consider having a sex change, to undergo cosmetic surgery to appear "flawless" like many celebrities in the entertainment industry, to be involved in same-sex affairs or allow yourself to fall into homosexuality and promiscuous activities etc.
4) To distract you from remembering Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala by keeping you preoccupied with frequent sexual thoughts or having disturbing doubts about your faith/Imaan.
5) To make you lose hope in Allah's Mercy by making you assume that you're "not good enough" or that Allah the Most Merciful won't forgive you, or to prevent you from doing a good deed because you fear that some people may accuse you of "riyaa" deliberately doing righteous deeds to show off etc.
Whenever you are afflicted with occasional waswaas, persevere and keep fighting for Allah's sake against shaytan's evil insinuations. You are not accountable for indecent thoughts, ideas and imaginations as long as you do your best for Allah's sake to shield yourself from willfully acting upon them.
This is one of Allah's tests for you which you can pass
Inn-sha-Allah by remaining steadfast and patient, continuously seeking and applying authentic Islamic knowledge with Ikhlaas / sincerity, actively combating against satanic desires, learning from the lives of Muslims who strive to have Taqwa, and defeating your nafs until your soul can rest in Jannah Paradise for patiently striving.
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah has pardoned my nation for what occurs within themselves, as long as they do not speak of it nor act upon it."
Source: Sahih 6287, Sahih Muslim 127
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
Ibn Al-Qayyim said, “Know that passing thoughts are not harmful. Indeed, they are only harmful if they are sought after and engaged. For a thought is like a passerby on the road; if you ignore him, he will depart from you.”
Source: Al-Jawāb Al-Kāfī 1/157