๐ In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
๐️ Recently, a few days ago, while she was introducing me to her younger sisters visiting from a different city, this woman who was several years older than I am very strangely told me "look at her, she looks like an Arab, right? She looks more Arabian than you. She looks Arab! You? Not so" as if my main ambition in life is to look Middle Eastern. Even if she was simply goofing around or trying to soothe her ego, I found her odd behavior obnoxiously immature, particularly if she's forty something years old. I acknowledge that I can be really weird at times but not at the expense of others' identities or self-esteem. Her strange act of pointing out how I didn't look as "Arabian" as her sister did reminded me of that one time when another older female said to me something like "What? Your baby can't crawl yet? That's too bad. My baby knows how to crawl, and she's super fast at crawling!" I was around twenty-one or twenty-two years old that time while she was probably in her late thirties. Although she was a guest at our residence for a number of days, a part of me still wonders if she was responsible for damaging some of the toys and the stroller which we bought from Saudi Arabia.
Anyhow, Alhamdulillah, I've learned that when Allah the Almighty bestows on you a wide variety of blessings, inevitably you may encounter some intensely jealous clowns here and there, and as Muslims we must strive for Allah's sake to have patience with their lousy acts.
A person being a lot older than us can't always guarantee that they've achieved maturity. So they're not qualified to offer advice regarding certain matters, especially if our interests, goals, personality and values conflict with each other.
❎ 3 Clear signs of awfully immature "adults":
1] They frequently talk nonsense or utter uncalled-for remarks without first analyzing the probable outcomes of their ridiculous statements.
2] Through their passive-aggressive behavior and despicable lack of good manners, it is obvious that they envy others' lives immensely. The only way for most of them to cope with unpleasant jealousy is by acting disrespectfully. Since they don't want to be the only ones suffering emotionally, they'd do whatever they can to ensure that other individuals suffer similarly.
3] They're extremely competitive while you're not even attempting to compete with them. They discovered that you traveled to France, England and Egypt? Maybe they'll desperately search for ways to travel to more countries than you and possibly daydream of flying to the moon before you reach it.
✅ Some tips on dealing with immature "adults":
1] Feel sorry for them. They must be so terribly unhappy from within that they have the need to spoil others' peace to feel better about their unsatisfied selves.
2] Thank Allah the Most Loving that you are not as miserable, uncivilized and unprincipled as those immature "adults" are. It is much worse to be the sad bully who accumulates people's sins through oppression (dhulm / injustice) than to be the reason why the bullies are struggling with intense envy.
3] Keep your distance from them as much as possible. Avoid them for Allah's sake online and offline when avoiding them is a lot more beneficial than starting an artificial dialogue.
4] Never bother asking them personal questions which won't benefit you at all. Don't pay attention to the absurd lies they invent to impress their gargantuan ego.
5] Recall how Allah's Prophets 'alaihim as-salaam, including the beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam, were also tested with sometimes meeting difficult types of personalities. Just because your parents tried their best to educate you about how to properly conduct yourself around others, it doesn't mean that every single soul you speak to on earth will have the exact same attitude and upbringing as you.
In this temporal dunya, we're bound to occasionally meet people who aren't beautiful on the inside so we can improve as Muslims in applying Sabr/patience and Shukr/gratitude (grateful to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala for not making us insecure and immature).
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๐ Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) wherever you are, follow up a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day (the Day of Judgement), let him speak goodness or remain silent. Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his neighbor. Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his guest."
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Let him not harm his neighbor."
And in another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Let him uphold family ties."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5672
Sahih Muslim 47
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
๐ Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise for one who leaves arguments even if he is right, and a house in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lies even when joking, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character excellent."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4800
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi
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