💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
💌 A woman would have to be so shallow and ignorant of Allah's legislations to invent a condition of not accepting a guy's marriage proposal unless he fully guarantees that she'll be his only wife for as long as she's alive. While it's okay for her to wish that she marries a man who is monogamous, we cannot deny the fact that Allah the Most Wise gave financially capable and responsible men the permission to marry up to four wives because:
1] The number of female population on earth without a doubt far exceeds the number of males. If all of the men were married to just one wife, there'd still be thousands of women left without a caring husband. With polygyny being permitted in Islam, single moms, widows and divorcees are given the opportunity to be part of a good Muslim family. They don't have to feel rejected, abandoned or looked down upon by guys who are not interested in marrying women who were previously married.
2] Being married to multiple wives means having more children who can become positive assets contributing to the Muslim Ummah through doing Da'wah, managing halal businesses and expanding access to Islamic resources etc.
3] Polygyny can encourage harmony within the community and enhance peaceful relations between different tribes, nationalities and racial backgrounds. Imagine a Maranao Muslim being wed to a Cebuana Muslim revert, a Tausug, a Maguindanaon, and a Kagan.
Their kids can Inn-sha-Allah learn to treat each other's tribes respectfully and cooperate together as one big happy Muslim family.
4] If the first wife is infertile or too unwell to give birth to any more babies, the husband has every right to marry another woman without divorcing his first wife. If the second wife is also incapable of bearing children, he can marry a third wife or try to adopt orphans (without falsely claiming them to be his own actual kids) together with the two wives whom Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala destined to be partnered with him.
5] Polygyny is an effective training for co-wives to eradicate despicable feelings of jealousy, insecurity and inferiority complex. By being a co-wife, a Muslimah gains inner strength, patience, resilience, deep understanding, empathy, while her heart is more beautified when she recognizes how patiently submitting to Allah's Will is more important to her than insecurely ensuring she's her husband's only lady.
You can't stop a man from wanting to have another wife if he believes that doing so is beneficial and rewarding. Nevertheless I can testify that there exists a number of men who are gladly contented with taking care of just one wife. For instance, my late father (Allah yarhamhu. Ameen.), he declined my dear mother's suggestion when she requested that he marries another woman so we have a stepmother who can look after us. Although he could afford to be married to multiple wives, he left this world contented being married to just one wife - our mother (Allah yarhamha. Ameen.).
What I'd like to point out is, Muslim women shouldn't think of polygyny as an evidence that they aren't ideal wives nor should wives in polygynous marriages feel more superior to those in a monogamous marriage. One rose in a crystalline vase looks just as beautiful as four splendid roses in a creatively designed flower pot, as long as they are consistently watered and well taken care of.
If you really must insist on being your husband's only wife, then it's possible to achieve that if you fulfill each and every one of his wishes without complaint, and you're extremely impressive that he never gets distracted by other women's varying good looks or qualities. A husband who has the full attention of his wife wouldn't require another one. His decision to remarry of course doesn't reduce his first wife's worth. In fact her value increases because she's strong enough to accept what Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala legislated in Islam and her acceptance of herself isn't tied to being her husband's only partner. She has always been whole, and having another co-wife doesn't make her incomplete in any way.
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."
Source: Sahih Ibn Ḥibbān 4252
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhī 1159
Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi
Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."
Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātīḥ 5/2125
