Tips: When To Ignore Insults, To Be The "Bigger Person", And When To Answer Back Since You're Not A Doormat

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ The word "doormat" also refers to an overly submissive person who allows others to treat them disrespectfully either due to lack of confidence or fear of dealing with conflict. While it's commendable to be the "bigger person" when somebody treats you rudely, constantly walking away from individuals who consistently disrespect you could imply that you're okay with being disrespected as though you're devoid of self-respect. 

✅ When should you talk back for Allah's sake and defend yourself, instead of staying quiet to be the "bigger person", if somebody is being obviously disrespectful towards you: 

1] If you know that responding with a clever comeback would please Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala much more than if you didn't say anything. If you believe that verbal retaliation is more effective in strengthening your level of faith/Imaan than giving the silent treatment. 

2] If you're being falsely accused of a wrongdoing which you don't do and the spectators who are listening happen to be your loved ones. 

3] If you believe that the person who insulted you has the ability or willingness to rectify what they said, and your intention of answering back is not to embarrass them but to correct their misconception about you and to improve your connection. 

4] If staying quiet when somebody belittles or mocks you leads to more negative outcomes than merits.

5] If the person has been purposely rude towards you more than three times and it's obvious that they treat others with better manners than with you. Confront them about their immature acts and inform them that if they can't display decent behavior when you're around, they must at least respect your decision to distance yourself from them.

❎ When is it wiser to ignore critics and reject invitations to pointless arguments:

1] Remain quiet and patiently ignore the person's rudeness if that's the very first time you've seen them behaving impolitely. Maybe they're struggling with some difficult circumstances or they are unaware that they acted inconsiderately. 

2] If you're in a hurry to complete an important task and reacting to the offender's criticism or misbehavior is clearly time-consuming, simply gift them with your indifference or pity their bad upbringing.

3] If responding with a clever comeback or behaving rudely in return for their rudeness is precisely what the offensive individual wants. Don't give anybody who dislikes you the satisfaction of seeing you feel distressed or worried. Instead, do what you can for Allah's sake to avoid needless interactions with toxic people and let your avoidance enhance your capability of avoiding the actions which Allah the Most Wise and His noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam warned against.

~•~ 

📖 Ali Ibn Husayn RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, part of perfection in Islam is for a person to leave what does not concern him."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2318

Grade: Sahih li ghayri (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Abu Sa'eed Al-Khudri RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever among you sees evil, let him change it with his hand (by stopping it physically). If he is unable to do so, then with his tongue (verbally, by warning or speaking against that wrongdoing). If he is unable to do so, then with his heart (by at least hating the sin instead of admiring the wrongdoers), and that is the weakest level of faith." 

Source: Sahih Muslim 49 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe (not guilty of backbiting, telling lies, and purposely committing oppression / injustice). The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. 

By the One (Allah the Almighty) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/poem-when-you-can-show-anger-for-allahs.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/poem-when-to-interfere-or-enjoin-good.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-wisdom-is-in-knowing-when-to-speak.html 

https://personalitygrowth.com/heres-how-much-of-a-doormat-you-can-be-based-on-your-personality-type/

Note: Some Advice On How To Deal With Being Treated Disrespectfully

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ How to deal with being treated disrespectfully... 

🔹 ...by someone who's a complete stranger and who may possibly not interact with you again in the future (such as unfriendly salespeople, insolent waiters, rude customers, bad-tempered staff, and grumpy taxi drivers etc.): 

1➡️ Cleverly analyze why they may be acting that way and have the strength to practice empathy. Maybe they're in a bad mood because: 

1✨ ...that's their last day / night at work and they're anxious concerning how to cope with unemployment. 

2✨ ...they haven't eaten anything for several hours and their hunger is what's triggering their irritability. 

3✨ ...they've just had a fight or argument with somebody whom they thought could be trusted. 

4.✨ ...they came back from a barber shop and they despise their awful haircut which is unfixable. 

5✨ ...they're brokenhearted, someone they admire rejected them and they loathe being single. 

6✨ ...they tried asking their employer or manager for a raise and instantly their request was denied. 

7✨ ...they haven't slept well in a long time, and their grumpiness is due to feeling groggy. 

8✨ ...a number of their loved ones are not giving them the respect which they demand, so they take out their frustration on strangers to soothe their emotional wounds. 

9✨ ...they generally dislike themselves and the job they accepted reluctantly. Their self-loathing is what leads them to treat other humans ungraciously.

2➡️ Thank Allah the Almighty that you're not the insecure individual who is emphasizing their lack of confidence by acting like a bully to others. It is more unfortunate and deplorable to be in that person's wretched circumstance (as they could be struggling with misery inwardly or they're being mistreated by somebody else which compels them to act obnoxiously) than to be the one on the receiving end of lousy conduct. 

3➡️ Since you understand what it feels like to be treated disrespectfully, be motivated to maintain good character, as much as possible, with every soul whom Allah the Most Wise destines you'd meet. 

🔹 ...if the disrespectful person is a family member, acquaintance or colleague whom you see frequently: 

1✨ Stay patient with them for Allah's sake, particularly if you can figure out what's causing them to act inappropriately. 

Are they missing somebody? Did they skip a meal? Do they need to take a nap to feel more energized? Have you forgotten something which they requested you to do? What if they misbehaved out of compulsion and someone else commanded them to treat you rudely due to that outsider's insecurities and immaturity? Are they actually depressed? Perhaps they can't stand being jealous of you?

2✨ Minimize unnecessary interactions and meaningless conversations with people who are knowingly toxic or disrespectful. Don't bother checking their posts and comments on social media either.

3✨ Instead of wanting to retaliate and verbally get back at those who've been unpleasant, confidently believe that Allah the Most Wise will deal with them justly at the most ideal timing, and conduct yourself as the more emotionally mature adult, as though you're a calm kindergarten teacher attempting to sympathize with a little child throwing a tantrum. While we can't always change or influence how people choose to behave, we have the freedom to cautiously select who from Allah's servants deserve our actual care, attention and reactions.

~•~ 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe (not guilty of backbiting, telling lies, and purposely committing oppression / injustice). The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. 

By the One (Allah the Almighty) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:

"The supplications of three persons are never turned away (rejected): A fasting person until he breaks his fast, a just ruler, and the supplication of the oppressed which is raised by Allah above the clouds, the gates of Paradise are opened for it, and Allah the Almighty says: 'By My Might and Majesty, I will help you in due time.'"

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3598 Grade: Sahih

Umar Ibn Al-Khattab RadhiAllahu 'anhu said:

"Beware of the supplication of the oppressed (Du'a against the oppressive person), for the supplication of the oppressed is answered."

Source: Al-Muwaṭṭa 1890 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/04/poem-three-reasons-why-allah-sometimes.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-ways-to-react-to-peoples-rudeness.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-three-tips-on-how-not-to-be-overly.html 

Tips: Nine Things Which People With A Strong Personality Are Not Afraid To Do

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Nine things which you're not afraid to do when Allah the Almighty blesses you with a strong personality (true confidence):

1] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of standing out from a crowd or behaving differently from the majority of people, as long as you firmly believe that whatever you're doing is something which Allah the Most Wise and His noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam love. 

2] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of speaking up and correcting a person's misinformation or misinterpretation which could mislead others. 

3] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid to disappoint people and decline requests which you're incapable of doing, whether you refuse to comply because you've got other tasks to prioritize or doing that favor would conflict with your values. 

4] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid to verbally defend a Muslim who's the subject of some lousy gossip and rumors, or if you can't say anything in their defense, without hesitation you are not afraid to walk away from the toxic discussion. 

5] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of saying sorry and sincerely apologizing to individuals whom you have knowingly or unintentionally mistreated. 

6] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of looking weird, seeming strange to others and getting laughed at for doing something which not everybody can readily approve of. 

7] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of making mistakes and encountering failures, as you always trust Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala Who knows what's best for you, and you're willing to learn from any mistake you commit. 

8] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of giving something a second and third try after failing in the first attempt. If it doesn't work out again, you're not afraid of canceling it or conducting different plans to reach the same goal. 

9] When you have a strong personality, you're not afraid of solitude and appearing "lonely" if you decide to quit trying to be close friends with individuals who are untrustworthy or whose vibes are not good for you.

~•~ 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or is being oppressed." It was said, “O Messenger of Allah, we help the oppressed, but how do we help an oppressor?” The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "By seizing his hand (by preventing the oppressor from oppressing)."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 2312 

Sahih Muslim 2584

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan." 

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/note-on-being-one-of-allahs-allies.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/note-on-fearing-only-allah-almighty.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/tips-signs-of-females-with-very-weak.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/03/tips-eleven-tips-to-become-more.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-eleven-signs-of-people-with-strong.html 

https://youtu.be/UH2Xbg1C-SU

Tips: Some Signs That Allah The Almighty Blessed You With Inner Peace

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Some signs that Allah the Almighty has blessed you with inner peace and serenity (you don't have anxiety): 

1] Listening to songs and music as a hobby is something you don't do anymore. You prefer to attain peace by frequently reading from the Noble Qur'an and listening to soothing Qur'an recitations. 

2] You regularly say Dhikr, including the morning and evening Adhkaar, and increase saying Istighfaar whenever you can. 

3] You know that your heart is free from unreasonable grudges and the urge to carry out revenge on another Muslim. If there's someone whose unreliability and bad attributes cause you to dislike them for Allah's sake, you simply avoid stalking their posts online and minimize unnecessary interactions with them instead of indulging in lousy gossip. 

4] You're incapable of getting offended and disappointed easily, aware that every human being whom Allah the Most Wise wants you to interact with is liable to forgetting, misconstruing and committing mistakes once in a while, and not everybody is fortunate to have been educated about good manners. 

5] You're confident enough to refrain from overreacting emotionally when some individuals forgot or refuse to invite you to attend a social event or gathering, as you strongly believe that Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala already destined the places where you're meant to visit and already chose for you the kind of people whom you can feel comfortable around and whose values won't conflict with your goals. 

6] Being nosy or intrusive, obsessively browsing around profiles of strangers who can't inspire you to become a better Muslim, and trying to catch up with vloggers who upload content which can't provide any significant value to your faith/Imaan are not from your usual habits. The less you nosily interfere with the personal issues of people while your interference causes more stress than benefit, the more inner peace you enjoy. 

7] You're unable to feel envious of others, or if ever you're sightly triggered by envy, you are tough enough to resist acting upon negative feelings of jealousy. Jealous individuals are more likely distressed and anxious than Muslims who patiently accept Allah's Wisdom in distributing His tests and blessings to whomever He Wills. 

8] You willingly let go of past misunderstandings and don't make it a rule to win every single debate or argument. You know when to speak up and when it's wiser to remain silent. 

9] FOMO (fear of missing out) doesn't affect you negatively. If some relatives, mutual friends or colleagues go on a trip without you, you don't act insecure nor scold them regarding why they didn't include you. Reflectively you analyze the possible reasons behind their choice to exclude you this time, either due to lack of budget or assumption that you're too busy to participate, and with rewarding Sabr accept Allah's Qadr in not decreeing that you'd accompany them. 

~•~ 

📖 Ali Ibn Husayn RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, part of perfection in Islam is for a person to leave what does not concern him."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2318

Grade: Sahih li ghayri (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Suhayb RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Amazing is the affair of the believer, as there is good for him in every matter. This is not the case for anyone but for the believer. If he goes through ease (or happy moments), he thanks Allah and it is good for him. If he goes through difficulty, he shows patience and it is good for him."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2999

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://abukhadeejah.com/finding-the-sweetness-of-iman-delights-of-worship/

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/note-inner-strength-with-taqwa-and.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/02/tips-seven-things-to-avoid-to-achieve.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-three-signs-of-people-who-are.html 

Tips: Advice On How Not To Care About How People Perceive You

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 Five things to recall, to not care about people's opinions of you: 

1] Allah the Almighty Who created us has complete control over everything and everybody. Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala is the Only One Whom we must strive to please; we weren't designed to behave like slaves to His servants. 

2] Why should we care about how people perceive us when they themselves aren't entirely flawless and infallible? It doesn't make sense if a bunch of pencils laugh at an unsharpened pencil while they're either too short to grasp, they're broken or they're similarly blunt.  

3] A lot of the individuals who find it easy to criticize you may act hypercritical to distract themselves from their own problems and insecurities. Don't allow somebody's misery to disturb your inner peace. 

4] Just as you have the freedom to make judgments about people, according to their treatment of you or how you truly feel around them, others have a right to evaluate you based on their current circumstances and past experiences. Ultimately the way they view you says more about them than your true identity and reality. 

5] Most of the people on earth are not genuinely confident or actually happy from within. Those who are insecure with themselves or who feel as though they're lacking something which Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala granted you have a tendency to magnify your faults so their emotional wounds are soothed. As long as you're doing what you believe can bring you closer to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, don't bother adjusting or altering yourself to appease a fellow servant.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: 'Allah has decreed what He wills.' Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/tips-trust-allah-and-never-be-affected.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/poem-on-how-not-to-be-affected-by.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-dont-let-critics-decelerate-your.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-three-tips-on-how-not-to-be-overly.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/tips-how-most-intjs-would-respond-to.html