Tips: Three Common Mistakes Which Some Insecure Wives Do Which We Must Avoid

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Three prideful or egoistic moves done by many insecure women which could lead to divorce, marital abuse, and preventable misunderstandings: 

1] Childishly playing hide and seek: When a wife tries to play hard to get, acts unavailable, and purposely ignores her husband's calls and messages to teach him a lesson for disappointing her until he tearfully begs for her attention and forgiveness. In a lot of cases, the more distant, arrogant, and obnoxiously stubborn a wife behaves, the more the husband loses respect for her so he considers divorcing or marrying again. 

2] Frequently testing her husband's worth and ability to sacrifice his pride for her, as if he's her compliant student who's obliged to pass each one of her tests without a single mistake: For instance, when a woman assigns some of her supposedly supportive friends to flirt with him so they can report to her if he's loyal or not, and when she persistently commands him to carry out challenging tasks while threatening him saying something like, "if you really love me, you'd buy this. If you truly care, you'd purchase it with no questions asked. Let's go to that country for a vacation, but only if you love me.". 

3] Insecurely comparing her unique marriage life to others' romantic journeys: The more a wife annoyingly whines to her husband with lousy complaints such as, "Why can't we be like them? They dine in classy buffet restaurants every Friday night.", "Darling, I wish you were as well-toned, muscular, and athletic as the husband of so-and-so. Ever considered weightlifting, jogging every morning, or working out in a gym at least twice a week?", and "Starting from now, whenever we attend social gatherings, can we wear the same color of outfits like those cute couples with matching clothes?". 

The man whom Allah the Almighty has wisely selected for you as your soulmate and traveling partner to Jannah Paradise is unlike the other men. Don't insult his manhood and self-esteem by incessantly ordering him to copy other guys. The sweetness of bananas and durian isn't the same as the juiciness of watermelon and papayas, just as calmly sitting on cold marble floors in a brightly lit room feels so different from picnicking on soft sand under cloudy skies whilst listening to tranquil ocean waves. 

Marriage is a gift, blessing, and trust from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala which must never be taken for granted. If a well-respected boss or instructor entrusted you with a journal in which you're expected to write some significant information until he gets it back, would you, with fierce loyalty and rewarding patience hold on to it till the item is returned to its original owner, or will you disrespectfully drop it, due to emotional instability, then later ask for a new notebook because you weren't creative, focused, or dedicated enough to try various solutions to fix whatever problems you encountered with the first one? If the journal begins attacking, verbally abusing, or anxiously running away from you, double-check yourself. Frankly self-evaluate to determine if you're the one who installed some strange equipments or did something totally unacceptable to it unknowingly, which activated the avoidable drama.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi

Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātih 5/2125 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 4252

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations (mischief, trouble). One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'" 

Source: Sahih Muslim 2813 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-what-happens-when-allah-most-wise.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/07/poem-seven-reasons-why-divorce-is-more.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-demerits-of-divorce.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/04/poem-why-i-despise-divorce-even-though.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-so-you-divorced-you-can-remarry.html 

Tips: More Notes Regarding Doing Good Deeds On Behalf Of Muslims Who Passed Away

Note: Three Reasons Why You Can't Trust Most People And They're Not Wise Enough To Keep Your Secrets

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Three common reasons why most people can't be trusted to keep your secrets, and they feel the need to reveal the sensitive information you shared with them to others: 

1] They assume they're being helpful or interesting by revealing what you told them. If they're in a social setting, informing a group about your secret may make the gathering more entertaining. 

E.g. "Did you know that her husband used to be a varsity cheerleader back in his college days? Plus he used to beatbox, breakdance, and play the guitar. It's cool that he's an Imaam now." 

2] They are actually a jealous fake friend or two-faced frenemy. They want your overall name and image spoiled to better cope with their jealousy, inferiority complex, and insecurities. 

E.g. "So-and-so confided in me the other night about how she truthfully feels about you. She only married you not for true love but because you're American. She wants your green card, sweetheart. Why not divorce her so I'll be your only wife whose love isn't made up at all?"

3] They feel so proud of being one of your close friends that by having your secrets revealed to certain individuals, the latter would admire or envy your association. 

E.g. "She finally confessed to me that for three years she had weird feelings of attraction for you, and her aloofness was her coping mechanism to suppress them. See? My dreams did have meaning, Titser." 

~•~ 

📖 Ibn 'Abbas RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: I was riding behind the Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam when he said to me, "Young man, I will teach you some words. Be mindful of Allah and He will protect you. Be mindful of Allah and you will find Him before you. If you ask, ask from Allah. If you seek help, seek help from Allah. Know that if the nations were to gather together to benefit you, they will not benefit you unless Allah has decreed it for you. And if the nations gathered together to harm you, they will not harm you unless Allah has decreed it for you. The pens have been lifted and the pages have dried."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2516

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi 

📖 Ibn Umar RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "When Allah gathers together the earlier and later generations on the Day of Resurrection, He will raise a banner for every (betrayer) treacherous person. It will be announced that this is the treachery of this person, the son of this person."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5823

Sahih Muslim 1735

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-trust-allah-with-your-secrets-not.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/poem-be-patient-enough-to-keep-secrets.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-five-advantages-of-not-having-any.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-learn-to-keep-secrets.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/poem-questions-to-ask-yourself-before.html 

Poem: On The Topic Of Sexual Orientation And Labelling One's Sexuality

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 As a Muslim who strives to serve Allah the Most Wise, 

I don't label myself "lez", "pansexual", or "bi". 

While I don't buy labels, I know and I can't deny 

The fact that life's a test and shaytan with all his might 

Will do his best to divert humans from Paradise. 

~•~ 

While I don't call myself "lez", "pansexual", or "bi", 

I know that shaytan can play with hearts and he can try 

To entice a striving Muslimah to theorize 

That she has fallen in "love" with someone's loyal wife, 

When shaytan loves it when people spoil each other's lives. 

~•~

While I'm not officially "lez", "pansexual", or "bi", 

I understand that our foe shaytan may oftentimes 

Push us to ask ourselves, "these feelings are real, but why?"

When fixation with similar souls can't be denied.

Needless talks are then shunned, so fitna is minimized.

~•~ 

Just because I'm not "lesbian", "pansexual", or "bi" 

Doesn't mean it's perfectly fine, as much as I like, 

To stare at other females, with or without desire. 

I shall control my gaze, and look only when required, 

Since shaytan has his ways to make unwanted sparks fly. 

~•~ 

Zina ain't limited to lust between girls and guys, 

But it can also occur when some ladies admire 

Each other too much as though their hearts were magnetized. 

Shield yourself with Taqwa. Talk to Allah day and night. 

Love Allah more than anyone, to win every fight. 

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah has pardoned my nation for what occurs within themselves (indecent thoughts, imaginations, or feelings), as long as they do not speak of it or act upon it."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6287 

Sahih Muslim 127

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, what I fear most for my nation is the deed of the people of Lut / Prophet Lot  'alaihis salaam (i.e. homosexuality, zina between same genders)."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1374

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Suyuti

📖 Abu Sa'eed Al-Khudri RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man should not look at the nakedness (private parts) of another man, and a woman should not look at the nakedness (private parts) of another woman. A man should not lie with another man under a single blanket, and a woman should not lie with another woman under a single blanket."

Source: Sahih Muslim 338

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://www.abukhadeejah.com/lgbtq-homosexuality-gay-muslims-and-islam/ 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/poem-advice-on-how-to-react-rightly.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/05/poem-know-your-fitrah-no-one-is-born-gay.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/05/poem-on-prohibition-of-homosexuality.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/tips-on-dealing-with-fitna-of-same-sex.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-beware-of-shaytans-plot-to-delude.html 

Poem: What Zuhd / Asceticism Really Means

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 What does it mean to have Zuhd / asceticism? 

Zuhd doesn't imply absolute abandonment 

Of the lawful joys in life nor complete abstinence 

From enjoying the blessings that Allah has given. 

Zuhd doesn't involve toxic self-deprivation. 

~•~ 

Zuhd isn't purposely depriving yourself from 

Doing what makes you happy which isn't forbidden, 

Having a good profession to earn halal income, 

And traveling around to see Allah's creation. 

It has nothing to do with conscious self-destruction. 

~•~ 

To have Zuhd is to survive as Allah's servant, 

To make use of the things Allah gave to worship Him, 

And enjoy some halal delights so with contentment 

We thank Allah more for each blessing and provision, 

Preferring Jannah, while knowing this world is fleeting. 

~•~

It means awareness that dunya isn't permanent, 

That Allah, not life, owns us, and no comparison 

Is there between Jannah's bliss and dunya's distractions, 

And when some call us "poor", we don't find it insulting, 

As we're enriched with Islam, Allah's Love and Guidance. 

~•~

While it's fine to chill and unwind every so often, 

Do charity, when there's chance, so your faith can strengthen

And your station in Paradise attains enhancement. 

Regardless of social class and accommodation, 

Pray that Jannatul Ferdaus is our destination.

~•~ 

📖 Ibn 'Abbas RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Take advantage of five before five: Your youth before your old age, your health before your illness, your riches before your poverty, your free time before your work, and your life before your death."

Source: Shu'ab Al-Imān 9575

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The most privileged people in the world among the people of the Hellfire will come on the Day of Resurrection to be dipped in the Hellfire, then it will be said: 'O son of Adam, did you see any good? Did you get any blessing?' He will say: 'No, by Allah, my Lord!' Then the most miserable people in the world among the people of Paradise will come on the Day of Resurrection to be dipped in Paradise, then it will be said: 'O son of Adam, did you see any hardship? Did you have any distress?' He will say: 'No, by Allah, my Lord! I did not once see hardship or distress.'"

Source: Sahih Muslim 2807

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/08/poem-be-well-prepared-for-meeting-with.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/04/poem-be-contented-knowing-that-dunya-is.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-i-cant-get-jealous-for-worldly.html 

https://soundcloud.app.goo.gl/9HMoy