💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
📜 Question: How can I be fair with all of my friends?
📝 Answer: Since Allah the Almighty created everyone differently and not all of our friends have the exact same goals, interests and personality, it is impossible to be completely fair with each one of them. There will be some friends that we like more than others, because we find them more relatable, compatible and similar to us in many ways than the others. We hang out with certain friends more frequently than with others because they live nearer to us, they're more accessible, more available, and there is no conflict in our busy schedules, so meeting up with them or going on regular outings together is a lot easier than with the other friends. Our love for specific friends is also stronger when we've known them for a longer period, we're more used to each other, and we don't see each other as strangers. Another reason why we click better with some friends more than other acquaintances is we communicate and interact with them more regularly than with those who aren't close to us yet, while the feelings of care, support and respect are mutual. The friendship isn't one-sided at all, and no one is secretly jealous of the other.
You can try your best to be fair with all of your friends by making sure you always respond to their Salaams upon seeing them. If you're in a social gathering, make sure you greet everyone you're familiar with and you don't deliberately ignore anyone in the meeting.
You can be fair by preventing yourself from lying to your friends, from betraying and backbiting. All of these friends whom you love for Allah's sake should be treated with good character and courteous manners as much as possible, regardless if you've been friends with them since you were in high school or you've just met this year. Maintain a cheerful disposition and smile in their presence. Smiling doesn't make you fake nor artificial, but it displays confidence, shows you're approachable and it's a good deed that can be counted as a charity or sadaqah which any Muslim can do for the sake of Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala.
When your friends seek advice, give them the most helpful tips you can, even if providing assistance may lead them to becoming more successful at a field, say school or business, than you. If you have the ability to fulfill the rights of each of your friends, then do so. When invited to a friend's wedding, try to attend. If you're unable to witness their special occasion, at least congratulate them, send a loving message or mention them in a heartfelt Du'a/supplication.
If you hear news that a friend was confined in a hospital, visit them for Allah's sake, and if you can't be there to see them personally, at least text them and pray for them.
If three of your friends are getting married on the same date but at different wedding venues, you can attend all three weddings very briefly to accept the wedding invitation, or you can go to the wedding of the friend who is most closest to you, while you send gifts and congratulations to the other friends.
Being fair with all of your friends doesn't mean you spend time with each one equally and you provide every friend the exact same amount of attention as the others, but you strive to deal with them with good character, trying your best to never offend them and if you do you're strong enough to apologize and compensate for any wrong, and if ever they disappoint you, you're willing to understand their side and forgive for Allah's sake with lots of Sabr.
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The souls are like conscripted soldiers. They come together upon what they recognize, and they differ upon what they reject."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3109, Sahih Muslim 2638
📖 Abu Ishaq RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The best of what a believing man can be given is good character, and the worst of what a man can be given is an evil heart with a beautiful appearance."
Source: Muṣannaf Ibn Abī Shaybah 24747
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Suyuti
📖 Mu’adh Ibn Jabal RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Allah the Almighty said: 'Those who love each other for the sake of My Glory will be upon pulpits of light, admired by the prophets and the martyrs.'"
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhī 2390
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
