💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
💌 Eleven kinds of co-wives you may encounter if you are in a polygynous marriage:
1] The one who is in denial that she's in polygyny, and she emphasizes a lot online and offline how her husband is hers only. She accepts you being a co-wife but she likes to think she's the husband's favorite.
2] The one who's younger than you and mainly respects you because of your age. Sometimes you can't tell if it's an insult or a compliment that she calls you "atty (elder sister)".
3] The one who feels jealously threatened by your younger age and may assume that the husband you both share loves you more than her.
4] The one who acts as if you don't exist, who can't acknowledge your presence or who's okay with you being her co-wife as long as you abstain from communication.
5] The nosy or subtly competitive one who wants to know as much as she can about how your husband and hers treat you. If she discovers you and the man you both love went to a certain restaurant, she demands that she also goes there to ensure there's complete fairness and equal treatment.
6] The friendly, genuinely caring and understanding one who doesn't mind giving her share of time with the husband to you or who rarely complains if the hubby seems to like you more.
7] The one who acknowledges that you are her husband's other wife yet she prefers to not get too close to you, while she has her own squad of friends who are likewise not interested in getting too close to you because you're "the other woman" of their friend's husband.
8] The helpful and generous one who's clearly competing with you in terms of righteousness, who tries to help you with your house chores, visits frequently, takes care of your kids, invites you to Islamic lectures, occasionally goes shopping with you, and trains herself to not get jealous of you at all.
9] The one who's busily looking for another wife (preferably from her supportive friends) for the man you both love. So instead of him being married to two wives, he can be wed to three or four not necessarily so they can all team up against you but to increase the family size, and so she and the new wife can encourage each other to be patient whenever their husband is with you.
10] The contented, clever and patient one who understands the virtues of marriage for Allah's sake, patience and polygyny. Whenever you and the man you both love get into an argument, she encourages him to forgive you and allows him to spend extra time with you if you're unwell or you recently delivered a baby.
11] The sneaky and insecure one who does whatever she can to succeed in encouraging her husband to leave you. Wives of this sort usually resort to black magic, witchcraft and sorcery (a major sin which every Muslim must stay away from) so the love between you and your husband gradually decreases.
Remember to shield yourself by trusting Allah the Almighty at all times, reading from the Noble Qur'an regularly, as well as saying lots of Adhkaar and Du'as.
💚 Note: Understand that your husband's other wife (or wives) is part of the family and it is important in Islam to treat your relatives as well as you can, or at least avoid purposely causing any harm to them, particularly if they are Muslims who pray to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala and they're eager to enter Jannah with you.
There's no need to regard your co-wife as a competition concerning worldly matters when you should be focusing on trying to be the best version of yourself as an ideal Muslim wife for Allah's sake.
The successful wife in a polygynous marriage isn't the one who receives the most gifts, romantic gestures, or quality time with the husband, but she's the one who is most patient and most contented with what Allah the Most Wise legalized for financially capable and responsible Muslim men.
📖 Thawban RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “The best wealth is a tongue that remembers Allah, a grateful heart, and a believing wife to help one in his faith.”
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3094
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 ‘Urwah reported: Aisha, may Allah RadhiAllahu 'anha said, "I never felt so jealous about any woman as I did for Khadijah (RadhiAllahu 'anha). She had died three years before I married the Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam. I heard him mentioning her so often, and Allah ordered him to give her glad tidings of her palace in Paradise made of reeds. The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam would slaughter a sheep and distribute its meat among her friends."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5658
Sahih Muslim 2435
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes.”
Source: Sahih Ibn Ḥibbān 4252
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abdullah ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife.”
Source: Sahih Muslim 1467
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
