💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
📜 Question: As a Muslimah whose MBTI personality type is INTJ-A, how do you usually react if you arrive at a place and overheard some individuals clearly gossiping about you, for instance you caught one of them saying "here comes such and such" describing you negatively or inaccurately?
📝 Answer: First of all, Alhamdulillah, I wouldn't be surprised if I overheard a number of females, regardless of their age, talking badly about me on a regular basis, because I understand that if Allah the Almighty has bestowed upon you several gifts and favors, your mere presence would inevitably attract many envious gossipers, and sadly the majority of people on planet earth are unable to restrain themselves from acting on unpleasant feelings of ugly envy.
If I know for sure that a group of individuals were backbiting about me, I would confidently walk up to them and straightforwardly say something like:
"Salaam alaikum, how are you all? Nice weather, huh? MashaAllah. A while ago, please correct me if I am wrong, I heard one of you saying such and such about me. Were you talking bad about me or were you referring to somebody else? Because either way, that's backbiting, and it's a major sin. Plus, gossiping is typically done by the jealous and insecure. Are you jealous and insecure?"
Or "Wow. Am I always the subject of your talk/discussion? Why are you so obsessed with me? FYI (for your information), I don't feel the same way about you."
Or "Your endless jealousy and gossip don't impact me. Why not stop your lies and self-delusion?"
Or "Do you spread rumors about me whenever you feel jealously threatened or depressed? Do my talents and achievements, Alhamdulillah, make you feel inferior or slightly upset? Is your addiction to gossiping your method of reducing your sadness or stress? I'm willing to listen to you whine about how your current emotional state is a mess. Your tendency to gossip behind my back while stupidly not knowing what to say in my presence is one way to define cowardice."
✅ Otherwise I would completely ignore them for Allah's sake and refuse to interact with their nonsense if:
1. ...I'm not entirely certain that they were referring to me or someone who matters to me.
2. ...I'm in a hurry to do something else that's a lot more important than initiating meaningless conversation with some corny clowns who fail to control their silly emotions.
3. ...We don't go to the same school or workplace, and I have no interest whatsoever in attempting to connect with a complete stranger whose awful personality doesn't deserve even an iota of my attention.
If what the gossipmonger has said about me was deliberately untrue or intended to be offensive (and if they're not a family member or close relative), I would likely include that unfortunate person in my Du'as for justice and supplicate to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala against them, also when praying Tahajjud / Qiyaam Al-Layl, until I witness Allah's retribution or they've apologized sincerely.
~•~
📖 Khuzaymah Ibn Thabit RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Beware of the supplication of the oppressed, for it is carried above the clouds. Allah the Almighty says: 'By My Might and Majesty, I will help you in due time.'"
Source: Al-Mu’jam Al-Kabīr 3630
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Barzah Al-Aslami RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “O you who have faith with their tongues but faith has not entered their hearts! Do not backbite the Muslims or seek their faults. Whoever seeks their faults, Allah will seek his faults. And if Allah seeks his faults, He will expose him even in the privacy of his own house.”
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4880
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Nu'aym reported: Fudayl ibn ‘Iyad, may Allah have mercy on him, said, “If you mix with people, mix with those who have good character; it only invites to good. Do not mix with those who have bad character, for it only invites to evil.”
Source: Ḥilyat Al-Awliyā’ 11728
https://tryingtofollowthesalaf.com/2016/01/12/supplication-of-the-oppressed-shaykh-zayd-al-madkhali/