๐ In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
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๐ Question: A lot of my teachers seem to ignore me on purpose. When I try to participate in class, they usually do not acknowledge my presence or seldom give me enough feedback on my overall performance. What can I do to cope with most people at school making me feel "invisible" and "unappreciated"?
๐ Answer: Who are you trying to please - Allah the Almighty or the people, Allah's slaves, fellow servants? If for some reason you're desperate to become "popular" like a so-called celebrity at school or in the workplace, you'd easily feel upset and disappointed when many individuals fail to remind you of your existence whenever they're preoccupied with their own lives, trials and problems to solve. Don't be obnoxiously selfish and so self-centered that you assume you should be the main character or "star" of every single person's life journey, that you must be greeted even with artificial smiles by every single passerby, and absolutely nobody has valid excuse to occasionally overlook you no matter how busy they get with their own responsibilities and issues.
➡️ Three probable reasons why some individuals act as though they're "ignoring" while in reality they aren't making you feel ignored at all:
1๐น They can't notice you clearly if you're seated in one of the last rows of the class or far corners of a meeting room while your voice isn't as loud or audible as it should be if you want others to pay attention to your statements or questions.
2๐น They're regularly distracted by other students or tasks, and even if they wish to attend to you at times, something else frequently comes up and they may not be skilled at multitasking.
3๐น They presume or speculate you're okay and that you don't require them to constantly check up on you. Perhaps they perceive you as a confident, competent and very independent person who does not expect validation or support from anybody (except from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala of course).
❎ Three common reasons why some people on earth pathetically go out of their way to make you feel "unseen" or "undervalued":
1๐ฉ Maybe they're intensely jealous of you. Whenever you're around, your presence reminds them of several things which they either failed at or which they lack, and ignoring you on purpose is their unreasonable style of fleeing from unpleasant feelings of debilitating envy.
2๐ฉ There's a possibility that a number of individuals are similarly "ignoring" them often, which triggers their insecurities and misconduct. They feel sad and dislike themselves terribly, so they also want you to feel as miserable as they are currently.
3๐ฉ They probably believe that since you're an active participant or receive sufficient attention in class, you ought to give others the chance to express themselves or address whatever concerns they may have. Eagerly wanting the spotlight in any gathering or discussion while overlooking the fact that not every single specimen in the universe can maintain eye contact with you 24/7 could be why you sometimes feel "unacknowledged" whenever some individuals need to go on with their different assignments and priorities.
✅ What you can do to cope with some individuals oftentimes behaving as though they're "dismissive" or "indifferent":
1๐ Humbly accept the truth that the main purpose behind the existence of all human beings is to sincerely worship and serve Only Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, not to consistently treat you like a VIP (very important person) or "superstar". Even celebrities and politicians from time to time get "ignored" when the paparazzi and journalists have other subjects to pursue or focus on.
2๐ Recall that not being "famous" can actually be a blessing in disguise. Those instances when you're not being "noticed by people" are excellent opportunities for you to do plenty of righteous deeds for Allah's sake with pure Ikhlaas (sincerity) in seclusion, such as reading from the Noble Qur'an and seeking beneficial Islamic knowledge through trustworthy sources.
3๐ For some individuals, particularly true introverts, the less they interact with people, the less prone they are to unnecessary stress and worrying about how they should return favors and how to adjust their schedules so they can find balance in their social interactions.
4๐ Stay contented with Allah's Love and Guidance. Be satisfied with the souls whom Allah the Most Wise chose and destined to appreciate your companionship, including your mother, father, grandparents, aunties, uncles, biological and/or half siblings etc. and that one friend who's around your age who genuinely enjoys spending time with you while they're not guilty of being jelly (jealous) and insecure.
5๐ For Allah's sake keep yourself productively busy with worthwhile things and goals, instead of having too much free time to overanalyze irrational or insignificant actions.
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๐ Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah (The Almighty) wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
๐ Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2664
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
