Tips: Acting Mean Or Obnoxiously "Savage" Isn't From The Qualities Of An Ideal Muslimah

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Some females wrongly assume that being an "ice princess" or unemotional "ice queen" portrays you're a strong woman when in reality disrespect, rudeness and unjustifiable aloofness are typical traits of the highly insecure.

While it's your absolute right to choose who gets to be in your squad of close friends, your pickiness is not valid excuse for you to obnoxiously treat others rudely, ignore other Muslims' salaam just because you don't know them, and childishly gossip about those whom you disagree with. 

People who secretly hate themselves, who are unhappy with their current lives, or who have extremely low self-esteem are more likely to channel their negative energy into others by being rude and disrespectful while maintaining an angry scowl. They're the type of individuals who instantly assume you're being fake whenever they find you smiling, or who suspect you're trying to bribe them when you behave in a friendly manner. If you give them a gift, they'll probably ask questions like "What's the occasion? Is there something you want from me?" or "Are you trying to tell me that I'm poor and you're rich? Why are you giving this to me, I didn't ask for it."

Their mindset is full of so much negativity that nearly whatever act of kindness you do they return it with disdain, scornful indifference or rejection. With these types of souls whom Allah the Most Wise decreed that we encounter, we are trained to enhance our level of patience, gain inner strength, and express gratitude Alhamdulillah that we are nothing like them. 

Even if certain acquaintances or strangers accuse us of being "plastic" or "pretentious" because they obviously are not familiar with what we're really like, we continue being kind and generous for Allah's sake whenever we can. Kindness isn't restricted to constantly spoiling friends with tangible gifts and freebies, but in sharing Islamic knowledge generously for Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, defending them when they aren't around, cheering them up when their moods go down, praying for them regularly, and in being the trustworthy friend whom Allah expects us to be. 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is friendly, for there is no goodness in one who is neither friendly, nor befriended."

Source: Musnad Ahmed 8945

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Arna’ut

Tips: Some Signs That You And Certain People Weren't Meant To Connect

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Signs that a person was not meant for you or destined to be with you (as a friend, spouse or business partner etc.):

1] Even if you have some things in common, you still don't feel at ease in their presence. You're not comfortable around them for some reason. You'd rather be alone sleeping, reading a book or contemplating than actively chatting with them. 

2] Interactions with them feel forced and your conversations don't flow smoothly. It's either because you're mostly the one talking, you can't relate to them or they find your overall habits too cringy. 

3] They can be your neighbors for several years yet you still wouldn't bother visiting them, since you can't think of enough topics to discuss and interesting activities to peacefully bond over with. 

4] They left your messages on seen mode numerous times. When you want to contact them, they're readily unavailable. Trying to reach out to them for a long productive discussion is something almost impossible.

5] The respect, care and trust are clearly one-sided. You're usually the one enthusiastically checking on them to see how they're doing. They rarely reciprocate or return your favors. 

✨ Signs that someone 

Inn-sha-Allah was meant to be in your circle:

1] They've appeared in front you online and offline multiple times. No matter how much effort you make in trying to avoid them, they usually show up as though they're accessible, available and approachable. 

2] Dialogues with them are generally fun, informative and beneficial. After interacting with them, you sense your faith/Imaan levels going up, and you eagerly look forward to speaking again in the future.

3] The more you get to know them and the more truths you discover about them, the more you like them for Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala. 

4] Regardless of where they reside, whether they live some miles away in the same city or they are located in another country, you wish you were neighbors so you can spend quality time with one another more frequently.

5] The love for Allah's sake, trust and respect are mutual. There is no jealousy, doubt and negative feelings between you two. Even if they may be more successful or efficient at something than you somehow, seeing them do well in their Deen and dunya can't trigger any feeling of envy because you want what's best for them, just as you hope they want you to thrive similarly. 

🔸 How to deal with those who aren't meant for us:

1] Accept Allah's Qadr/Destiny patiently. 

2] Acknowledge the fact that not everyone can agree with our beliefs and perceptions. We're here to serve Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala in a way that we believe is right, not make duplicate copies of ourselves out of Allah's creation.

3] Understand that sometimes a person may reject us because we unintentionally remind them of their weaknesses, insecurities, and shortcomings. So long as we strive to treat everyone as fairly as we can, we're not responsible for people's emotions and reactions to our existence. 

4] Why worry too much about being liked by people when they themselves are overloaded with their own set of struggles, priorities and problems? Plus on the Day of Resurrection they'll be questioned for their actions and decisions?

With Allah's Love and Guidance, we cannot be incomplete nor lonesome. 

5] None of Allah's Prophets, 'alaihim as-salaam, especially the beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam were completely loved and accepted by each and every soul who heard about them. Hundreds of unbelievers and hypocrites, including from their relatives, caused damage to their own selves by stubbornly rejecting their calls and wrongly assumed those Prophets were lying. 

Allah's Love for us does not depend on how we are treated and viewed by Allah's servants. Persistently keep doing good deeds sincerely for Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala in spite of people's criticism, doubts and opposition.

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The souls are troops collected together. They come close upon what they recognize, and they differ upon what they reject."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3109, Sahih Muslim 2638

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

Al-Nawawi said, “When bodies meet in the world, they come together or differ according to how they were created. The righteous will incline to the righteous, and the evil will incline to the evil.”

Source: Sharh Al-Nawawī ‘alá Sahih Muslim 2638

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/note-how-to-deal-with-people-who-hate-us.html

Poem: Concerning Loved Ones And Friends Who Avoid Excessive Closeness Or Emotional Attachment

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Three reasons why some friends, often the more private types 

And those who prefer to have feelings rationalized, 

Minimize talks with you, don't chat as much as you'd like, 

And though they care for you, they're distant most of the time, 

So you can willingly give them space once in a while:

~•~

One: From unwanted emotions they're trying to hide, 

Whether low-key jealousy of life's joys you've acquired, 

Grief whenever you remind them of loved ones who died, 

Or intense attraction that could lead to what's not right, 

And avoiding you sometimes is their way to survive.

~•~

Two: You're not in their list of tasks to prioritize, 

No offense, but just as you've got your own likes, dislikes, 

Worries, duties, and goals, they too have their special rights 

To choose which task to complete and when to grant respite.

This reminds us to trust Only Allah the Most Wise.

~•~

Three: Balance/moderation they're trying to apply. 

They refuse to interact with you each day and night 

Since extreme intimacy is something they dislike. 

Emotional attachment has several downsides, 

One of which is shock or distress when a close friend dies.

~•~

Realize some friends' aloofness doesn't signify 

At all times that you're boring or by them you're despised. 

It's their style of shielding you from things Allah dislikes, 

Such as zina, telling lies, or the urge to backbite.

True friends empathize and provide space when it's required.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Love whom you love moderately, perhaps he will become hateful to you someday. Hate whom you hate moderately, perhaps he will become your beloved friend someday."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1997

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe. The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. By the One (Allah) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna’ut

📖 Al-Bayhaqi reported: Abu Qilabah, may Allah have mercy on him, said, “If you hear something about your brother that you hate, then make an effort to obtain an excuse for him. If you do not find an excuse, then say to yourself: 'Perhaps my brother has an excuse I do not know.'”

Source: Hilyat Al-Awliyā’ 2485

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-on-people-whom-i-cant-always-talk.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-detach-from-those-who-distract-us.html

Poem: How To Help The Oppressed Muslims In Other Countries

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 The way to help the oppressed Muslims in other lands 

Isn't through noisy protests, waving flags with one's hands, 

Making TikTok videos so global peace you demand, 

Damaging public property, sharing online rants, 

Dancing, or making graffiti with paint or spray cans.

~•~

If groups at school were mistreated by violent gangs, 

Would you march around with banners, yelling vibrant chants? 

Would you destroy those bullies' items because "you can", 

And carry posters to show the bullied you're their fans? 

Or will you call the admin, so they shall take a stand?

~•~

Ironic how in these instances some get alarmed, 

When triggered, they're eager to use their voice as their arms, 

With much vigor to protest in a courageous stance, 

Yet when the Imaam in their area calls the Adhaan, 

To perform prayers in the Masjid, just few respond.

~•~

Try to do these, to help the oppressed in other lands: 

Advise them to make Hijrah, to migrate, if they can. 

If they can't transfer, due to a complex circumstance, 

Tell them to stay patient and await Jannah's entrance, 

While you do Da'wah so people understand Islam.

~•~

Do charity if you can, to help those who were harmed. 

Send food, medical supplies, clothes, blankets so they're warm, 

And if you can, sponsor children who've become orphans. 

The least we can do is mention them in our Du'as.

Pray for the Ummah, as we trust Allah the Most Just.

~•~

📖 Khuzaymah Ibn Thabit RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Beware of the supplication of the oppressed, for it is carried above the clouds. Allah the Almighty says: 'By My Might and Majesty, I will help you in due time.'"

Source: Al-Mu’jam Al-Kabīr 3630

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or is being oppressed." It was said, “O Messenger of Allah, we help the oppressed, but how do we help an oppressor?” The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "By seizing his hand (by stopping him from oppressing)."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 2312 

Sahih Muslim 2584

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe. The emigrant is one who emigrates away from evil. By the One (Allah the Almighty) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor (Muslim or non-Muslim) is not secure from his harm."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibban 515

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna’ut

Poem: Nine Signs Of Actual Narcissists Which We Muslims Must Avoid

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Nine signs that someone you know may be a narcissist, 

Which explains why they often ignore your messages 

Or treat you with disrespect when they think you're "useless", 

To be aware in advance that they can't be trusted, 

And since they're toxic, they're unworthy of your friendship: 

~•~

One: They're secretly insecure, obviously jealous, 

And by your positive traits they're intimidated. 

Envy keeps them quiet when your gifts are detected. 

Two: They act like they're devoid of flaws, oh-so-perfect,

And if you try to advise them, they'd feel insulted.

~•~ 

Three: Taking loads of selfies is from their weird habits. 

They care a lot about their looks and public image. 

Four: They'll likely befriend you only if you're famous 

Or if to rich professionals you are connected, 

Eager to boost self-importance and take advantage.

~•~

Five: Since their hearts are full of grudges and self-hatred, 

It's effortless for them to be passive-aggressive, 

Slamming doors, scowling, and ignoring you on purpose. 

Six: They strive to be the best, most idealistic.

Be careful, if you surpass them, they'd really hate it.

~•~

Seven: Lacking empathy, they're overall selfish, 

Unable to truly share, support, and offer tips. 

Eight: Frequently they gossip about those they detest. 

Ironically they backbite yet loathe it when they're dissed, 

"Savage" to their foes yet with their feels so sensitive.

~•~

Nine: Their main aim in wanting to network or connect 

With the persons they meet is to be well-respected. 

That's why, if you've got few friends, they want you avoided. 

They're desperate to gain fans and be widely noticed. 

"Me", "myself" and "I" are from their favorite subjects.

~•~

Don't expect these things from any kind of narcissist: 

Real amity, honest advice, genuine kindness, 

Sympathy, and ability to keep your secrets. 

If you've met souls with big egos or self-interest, 

Gladly avoid them. With Allah's Love stay contented.

~•~

📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas’ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "No one who has the weight of a seed (or atom) of arrogance in his heart will enter Paradise." Someone said, "But a man loves to have beautiful clothes and shoes." The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah is Beautiful and He loves beauty. Arrogance means rejecting the truth and looking down on the people."

In another narration, the Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "No one who has the weight of a seed of faith in his heart will enter Hellfire."

Source: Sahih Muslim 91

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-what-it-means-to-be-actually.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-avoid-kibrarrogance.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-what-real-arrogance-is-and-what-it.html

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pYpI4WtaSgk