Note: The Choosiness Of Most INTJs When It Comes To Selecting Their Close Friends And Their Compatibility With Other MBTI Personality Types

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

🗒️ Why are most INTJ personality types very selective when it comes to choosing their close friends? 

1] Since INTJs are goal-oriented and enjoy solitude, they don't want unnecessary noise and incompatible outsiders getting in the way of their goals, research, and tasks to be accomplished. 

2] To them, it is pointless and actually hypocritical to pretend to be buddies with individuals whose values and interests clash with theirs. 

3] They don't want to waste time with lousy people who are likely to cause further trouble, drama, confusion, problems, and difficulties which they generally try to avoid.

🔹 Three things if you have them could inspire an INTJ to consider building a friendship with you: 

1] Being active, ambitious, and sincere in doing Da'wah. Generously sharing authentic Islamic knowledge, confidently enjoining what is right, and forbidding what's wrong, all for Allah's sake whenever you can. 

2] Enjoying reading about Islam and having a special connection with books, writing, poetry, libraries, and bookstores. 

3] Offering helpful services and managing successful halal businesses to the Muslim communities, or showing genuine care for the Muslim Ummah as a whole. 

🔹 Seven acts which turn off many INTJs, if you're guilty of at least two of these, they may treat you as another stranger whom they're not interested in being acquainted with on a personal level: 

1] Finding enjoyment in discussing people's flaws, childishly backbiting, and spreading false rumors or unverified news. 

2] Having the guts to criticize Muslims behind their backs online and offline yet when they're around, you cowardly remain silent. 

3] Impatiently ranting about negative issues in your life without attempting to solve them nor considering the advice given by an INTJ friend. 

4] Obnoxiously judging people according to their lifestyles, shallow ways of living, and socioeconomic status, or being insecurely materialistic, selfish, and narcissistic. 

5] Not having sufficient self-control and polite manners. Being too reckless, rude, and toxic to talk to. 

6] Regularly telling lies, breaking promises without apologizing or compensating, and proving multiple times that you're untrustworthy and unreliable. 

7] Unfairly assuming you know what our intentions are, claiming that we're "showing off", or making instant guesses about what we'll say or do next, when Only Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala knows the future completely.

🔹 Which types from the 16 personality types are most likely to: 

✅ Understand, closely resemble, and have a lot of shared qualities with the INTJ, if their overall goals are the same: 

ENTJs, other INTJs, INFJs, INTPs, ISTJs. 

☑️ Patiently tolerate their weirdness, slightly relate to, or sympathize with INTJs: 

ENFJs, ENFPs, INFPs, ENTPs, ISTPs.

➡️ Become potential friends if both sides can find reasons to respect each other: 

ESTJs, ESFJs, ESTPs.

↙️ Notice many differences with INTJs which trigger conflict, misunderstandings, and incompatibility. Maintaining long conversations with them can be difficult, unless they're a family member then they're tolerable. We INTJs try to care for our loved ones regardless of their MBTI type, as much as possible: 

ESFPs, ISFJs, ISFPs.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his close friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi

~•~

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/07/poem-whats-it-like-being-muslim-and-intj.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/poem-friendship-with-intjs-what-are.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-how-most-intj-personality-types.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/tips-eleven-signs-indicating-intj-cares.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/tips-intj-acquaintance-vs-intj-friend.html 

~•~

https://repeller.com/myers-briggs-compatibility-for-friends/ 

https://www.quora.com/Why-are-INTJs-so-picky-about-people 

🔹 To discover what your MBTI type is, you're welcome to take these tests:

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

https://www.truity.com/test/type-finder-personality-test-new

http://www.michaelcaloz.com/personality/ 

Note: My Brief Love Story And Why I Don't Feel Any Remose Loving My Husband For Allah's Sake

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Not everyone has the same love story. I remember my dear mom (Allah yarhamha. Ameen.) telling me how my father (Allah yarhamhu. Ameen.) used to make many attempts to court her, like the typical romantic Maranao guy with classic bell-bottoms back in the 80s, but she would reject every one of his efforts to gain her attention until he had the courage to speak to her family to officially seek her hand in marriage. Alhamdulillah my parents got married, visited several countries around the world including the US and UK, networked with Da'ees like Bilal Philips and AbdurRahman Dimashqiah, wrote several Islamic books together which were published by Darussalam Bookstores, and although their very first son passed away before I was born Alhamdulillah they did an excellent job at raising me and my brothers with a strict but worthwhile upbringing. Before my mom died from cancer she requested my dad to remarry so their kids can have a stepmother. My father however chose to have her as his only wife until after some months it was Allah's Qadr that my dad passed away following her. I believe his medical complications were also due to severe sadness from being a widower.

I pray that Allah the Most Merciful reunites my dear parents in Jannatul Ferdaus and accepts all their good deeds with Allah's Mercy. Ameen.

My husband's mother from what I know got married when she was around 14 or 15 years old. Alhamdulillah she and her husband, who happens to be my uncle (Allah yarhamhu. Ameen.) since I married my cousin, were able to have twelve children together Alhamdulillah, with one baby boy that passed away before my husband was born. 

My brother Ahmad since he was a baby was engaged to get married in the future to his childhood friend whom we'll nickname "A". A's mother and my mother gave birth at almost the same time in 1988 Dammam (northeastern Saudi Arabia). Because they were close friends, they promised they would let their babies (boy and girl) get married when they become adults. However since Allah's Plans always overtake His servants', that plan didn't take place. Thus my brother Ahmad got married to our paternal cousin who's around three years older than him. Alhamdulillah they currently have five adorable kids, whereas A is married to a Saudi guy whom she met in Malaysia and has one beautiful half-Saudi half-Filipino daughter at the moment.

My brother AbdurRahman, with Allah's Will, was the one who got married to his childhood friend Eemaan. They were never close though as little kids, but our families regularly attended the same gatherings back in Riyadh city. I pray that Allah the Most Loving blesses them with many pious Muslim children. Ameen.

My love journey is a complicated one, but Alhamdulillah every struggle comes with a set of lessons learned from whatever we experience. In my teens I received several marriage proposals, one coming from a religious Pakistani guy, one from a Filipino Muslim who was employed in Madinah at that time, one from a Filipino residing in USA, and another from a childhood friend whose name is like one of my brothers Abdul-Rahman. I rejected them all, claiming this one was too baby-faced, that one was too shy, this one was younger than me and I preferred an older guy. After some time my mother (Allah yarhamha. Ameen.) with her motherly instincts thought I was having a haraam connection with one of my former best friends, but that wasn't the case, we just enjoyed talking to each other on the phone a lot. Because she was worried I might turn into a "lesbian" (no, I'm not gay, queer, or bisexual), which is probably why in her opinion I kept saying no to the marriage proposals I was getting, she and my dad finally got me arranged to marry my first cousin, a medical doctor. So Alhamdulillah in Shawwal 2006 I got married at age 20 to my cousin who was 28 then. Since I grew up in Saudi Arabia while he was raised in Mindanao, we saw each other like complete strangers in the beginning and Alhamdulillah we learned more about love along the way. When I was around 26 years old I became his first wife when he married this Visayan lady who's one year older than me. Alhamdulillah through this marriage I became more enthusiastic and supportive of polygyny after doing extensive research on its virtues and benefits.

Another brief love story I want to mention is that of a childhood friend who divorced her husband after having one daughter with him. Several years later they remarried and Alhamdulillah they're able to have more children. Another older acquaintance, a mother of one of our students here at Wisdom Islamic School, also divorced her husband at one point but after a number of years went by, they remarried and had more kids with Allah's Will.

Never compare your love journey to others' marriage lives, as our Qadr, capabilities and roles are not exactly the same. What makes a marriage blessed isn't the couple's large number of children nor how much money the head of the family makes, but what really adds blessings and barakah to your marital life is genuine love for Allah's sake. A marriage is a blessing from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala if it protects both wife and husband from getting into zina / forbidden relationships, and if it trains you to embrace patience / Sabr and gratitude / Shukr thereby completing the other half of your Deen and leading you to Jannah Paradise where the sincere believers can enjoy perfect and flawless love for eternity.

📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas’ud RadhiAllahu anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu alaihi wa sallam said, "O young men, if you are able to support a wife, then get married. Verily, it restrains the eyes and guards chastity. Whoever is not able to do so, he must fast (Sunnah fasts) as it is a means of control."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 1806 

Sahih Muslim 1400

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-authentic-love-for-allahs-sake.html  

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-five-signs-that-youre-tough-wife.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/note-if-you-have-good-intentions-you.html

Poem: Love Your Husband Patiently For Allah's Sake And Know That You Married A Human Just Like You

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Note to self, and reminder to loyal, grateful wives: 

The man who was selected by Allah the Most Wise 

As your soulmate and travel buddy to Paradise 

Has feelings too. While at times he can laugh, joke and smile, 

Oftentimes there will be moments when he needs to cry.

~•~

Your husband, a human, may shed tears when he sometimes 

Feels stressed by countless trials and challenges in life, 

When guilt engulfs him for not fulfilling his wife's rights, 

When he can't always meet the needs of his children/child, 

Or when he solves problems only for more to arise. 

~•~

Don't view him as a knight in shining armor who likes 

Rescuing damsels in distress every day and night, 

Without support like he symbolizes "perfect might". 

Stand by his side or comfort him whenever he's tired, 

And keep calm when tiredness ignites the urge to start fights.

~•~

Due to stress, he may speak angrily once in a while, 

Answer your messages after some days have gone by, 

And respond to you in ways you're tempted to describe 

Him as "bad-tempered", "moody", "too bossy" or "unkind". 

You'd tolerate his flaws if your love isn't a lie.

~•~ 

Even well-designed robots require charging sometimes. 

Don't be surprised if your spouse isn't himself at times. 

Guys also have feelings. Let your partner verbalize 

And show you, his wife, precisely how he feels inside.

Patience is a must-have to ensure blessed marriage life.

~•~ 

Your husband isn't abusive if he was beguiled, 

Badly influenced or affected by evil eyes, 

Advised by toxic friends or relatives who dislike 

Seeing you two thriving towards Jannah with delight, 

Or sorcery was carried out by foes from outside. 

~•~

When it seems as though he's struggling with nosy spies 

Who command him to treat you in a way that's not right, 

Win this battle by not doing what shaytan desires, 

Lovingly pray for your husband every day and night, 

And don't let pride stop you both from earning Paradise.

~•~

📖 Narrated Abu Sa'eed Al-Khudri RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: On Eid-ul-Fitr or Eid-ul-Adha, Allah's Messenger SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam went out to the Musalla. After finishing the prayer, he delivered the sermon and ordered the people to give alms (charity). He said, "O people! Give alms." Then he went towards the women and said. "O women! Give alms, for I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-Fire were you (women)." The women asked, "O Allah's Messenger! What is the reason for it?" He replied, "O women! You curse frequently, and are ungrateful to your husbands. I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. O women, some of you can lead a cautious wise man astray." Then he left. And when he reached his house, Zainab, the wife of Ibn Mas`ud, came and asked permission to enter It was said, "O Allah's Messenger! It is Zainab." He asked, 'Which Zainab?" The reply was that she was the wife of Ibn Mas'ud. He said, "Yes, allow her to enter." And she was admitted. Then she said, "O Prophet of Allah! Today you ordered people to give alms and I had an ornament and intended to give it as alms, but Ibn Mas`ud said that he and his children deserved it more than anybody else." The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam replied, "Ibn Mas`ud had spoken the truth. Your husband and your children had more right to it than anybody else."

Sahih Al-Bukhari 1462

In-book reference: Book 24, Hadith 65

USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 2, Book 24, Hadith 541 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi

Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātih 5/2125

📖 Umm Salamah RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Any woman who dies while her husband is pleased with her, she will enter Jannah (Paradise)".

[At-Tirmidhi, who classified it as Hadith Hasan]

Riyad As-Salihin 286

In-book reference: Introduction, Hadith 286

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-authentic-love-for-allahs-sake.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/04/poem-be-strong-wife-and-love-your.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-five-signs-that-youre-tough-wife.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-some-tips-to-be-your-husbands.html