Tips: What Kind Of Co-Wife Would You Be If Your Dear Husband Had All Four Wives?

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Question: If your husband had four wives, what kind of co-wife would you be? 

📝 Answer: Allah the Almighty knows best. 

If my husband, with Allah's Will and Qadr/Decree, was legally married to four women, with me being one of his wives, I would: 

1] Try my best to frequently remind him to take care of all his wives as fairly and lovingly as he can for Allah's sake, avoiding intentional injustice and unjustified negligence towards any of the women whom he is lawfully married to. 

2] Advise the other wives to have patience with our husband whenever he is financially struggling or emotionally unwell. 

3] Occasionally visit the residence of each co-wife, if we've learned to become close friends, and similarly welcome them to the place where I stay whenever I'm in the mood to receive visitors. 

4] Consistently make effort to develop the friendship and sisterly love for Allah's sake with the wives of our husband, while staying away from favoritism and insecurely teaming up against one wife or two wives. 

5] Treat the children of my husband's other wives as if they were my own kids - with patient empathy and understanding. If one wife is infertile, I'd do what I can to avoid mentioning topics which I sense could upset her. 

6] Invite all co-wives or one co-wife on different timings for shopping, attending Islamic lectures together, or dining outdoors to strengthen our sisterhood for Allah's sake, while reminding one another to stay steadfast regarding showing respect to our dear husband. 

7] Act as an unbiased referee whenever two or three co-wives are quarreling, and calmly attempt to resolve the dispute, instead of coaxing them to aggravate avoidable drama. 

8] Inspire each co-wife to diligently educate their loved ones and other individuals about the virtues and wisdom of why Allah the Most Wise legalized capable and willing Muslim males to be wed to up to four loving wives.

9] Coach my husband to always forgive his wives, including myself, if ever any of them behaves in a way that he finds disappointing. Motivate him to never quit trying to keep the family strong and united for Allah's sake, reminding him as well as the co-wives that our foe shaytan is the only one who truly gets satisfied upon witnessing the number of broken Muslim families increasing due to pride/kibr, selfishness, impatience, unjust suspicion, and irrational attachment to this fleeting dunya.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 4252

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-my-answer-to-what-made-you-accept.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-seven-misconceptions-about.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/tips-when-is-polygyny-better-than.html 

Poem: Don't Be From The People Who Are Too Proud And Too Sad To Admit They're Sorry

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 The bigger one's ego, the harder it is to say 

"I'm sorry", "forgive me for what I did yesterday", 

And "please accept my apology. I'll compensate 

For any loss or damage that was clumsily made." 

Connections can weaken when ego gets in the way. 

~•~ 

Three reasons why some people can't admit their mistakes: 

The level of contentment with their lives is small-scale, 

So their eagerness to sadden you stems from self-hate, 

Or pride causes them to presume they're flawless always, 

Or they're driven by intense envy to misbehave. 

~•~ 

If someone's response to your messages was delayed 

And why they answered late isn't tactfully explained, 

Or a rude shopper's cart collided with yours one day, 

And some sellers didn't give the right amount of change, 

Let Allah deal with them, and move on for Allah's sake. 

~•~ 

For people's apologies it's better not to wait, 

As most are insecure and immersed in dismal states. 

Don't expect those with bad ethics to enunciate 

That they regret behaving badly and straight away 

They'll correct their errors when from pride they're not yet saved. 

~•~ 

Pardon their shortcomings and choices, for Allah's sake. 

Through encounters with them we're trained to never betray 

And act improperly with any of Allah's slaves. 

When mistreated by souls who carry around self-hate, 

Thank Allah. "Sad" and "insecure" aren't from your traits. 

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Charity does not decrease wealth, no one forgives another but that Allah increases his honor, and no one humbles himself for the sake of Allah but that Allah raises his status."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2588

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:

"The supplications of three persons are never turned away (rejected): A fasting person until he breaks his fast, a just ruler, and the supplication of the oppressed which is raised by Allah above the clouds, the gates of Paradise are opened for it, and Allah the Almighty says: 'By My Might and Majesty, I will help you in due time.'"

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3598 Grade: Sahih

Umar Ibn Al-Khattab RadhiAllahu 'anhu said:

"Beware of the supplication (Du'a) of the oppressed, for the supplication of the oppressed is answered."

Source: Al-Muwaṭṭa 1890 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/05/note-how-to-apologize-to-people-youve.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/poem-as-muslim-dont-be-rude-and-insecure.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-ways-to-react-to-peoples-rudeness.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-warning-against-dhulm-oppression.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-advice-to-those-who-went-through.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-thank-those-who-gossip-about-you.html 

https://abukhadeejah.com/allah-has-forbidden-oppression-for-himself-and-has-forbidden-it-for-the-people-hadith-qudsi/