💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
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🗒️ Oftentimes when you argue with some oversensitive individuals or those with bad intent in trying to connect with you from the beginning, they blurt out all of their actual perceptions of you and mention remarks which they'd later regret revealing. Although it is not easy for everybody, it is encouraged to forgive other Muslims for Allah's sake just as we too would want Allah the Almighty to pardon our shortcomings when we seek His Forgiveness. In spite of that, being lenient and forgiving shouldn't compel us to stay connected with individuals whose presence brings more damage than merit.
📨 When can we simply forgive a person and move on, without bothering to salvage the toxic "friendship" (we don't want anything to do with them anymore)?
1] If they mentioned something like "so it's true what those people said" or "so-and-so told me such-and-such about you. I see they're right" during the argument. You can't form meaningful connections with resentful gossipers who enjoy backbiting and believe in the validity of nonsensical rumors.
2] If they lack courage or integrity to clearly clarify their misconduct, or they respond to your questions with other queries such as "What about so-and-so? They did what I did. Why don't you scold them or condemn their acts also?", "Do you know that there are many others who did a lot worse than what I did?" and "Why do you act like you're the only perfect human being? I did what I did for a reason." You can never trust anybody who is too egotistical, prideful, selfish, greedy, or narcissistic to admit their mistakes and take responsibility for their actions.
3] If you realized they shamefully lied to you on more than one occasion. For instance, you requested them one day if they could accompany you to go shopping, and they cheerfully agreed. You asked them on the same day if they were really willing to join you outdoors and they reassured that you weren't causing any inconvenience. However, after you confront them about an abominable mistake they could've refrained from, they suddenly accuse you of being inconsiderate because once upon a time, you "made" them feel obliged to accompany you for shopping while they actually had more important tasks to do. Avoid building friendships with people who are not truthful, not trustworthy, and not transparent enough concerning how they truly feel. You can't gain anything valuable by talking to someone who willfully conceals certain truths from you, and they're more concerned about their own greed than rectifying themselves to please Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala.
✅ When can you forgive a Muslim for Allah's sake and consider reconciliation?
1] If they expressed that they were genuinely sorry and shed tears, or they were teary-eyed while apologizing.
2] If they eagerly promise to not repeat what they did while you notice positive change in their overall behavior.
3] If they apologized to you one-on-one plus they recruited some mutual acquaintances to apologize to you on their behalf.
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📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever loves for the sake of Allah, hates for the sake of Allah, gives for the sake of Allah, and withholds for the sake of Allah has perfected the faith."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4681
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Charity does not decrease wealth, no one forgives another but that Allah increases his honor, and no one humbles himself for the sake of Allah but that Allah raises his status."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2588
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is not stung twice from the same hole."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5782
Sahih Muslim 2998
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his close friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi
