Tips: If You're Serious About Keeping Your Marriage For Allah's Sake Strong Forever

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Be flexible, lenient and open-minded regarding how you perceive your husband's actions and conduct towards you, if you're serious about maintaining your marriage for Allah's sake patiently. For instance: 

📝 • When your husband walks in front of you or climbs up the staircase before you: 

❎ Don't assume he's not being a gentleman by insisting you go first. 

✅ See his action of walking ahead as his way to shield you and protect you from the front, ensuring that the steps and paths which you're about to tread on are safe and secure. 

• When your husband instructs you to avoid approaching him if you see him talking to or spending time with some of his male friends or colleagues: 

❎ Don't childishly assume that he's embarrassed to be seen with you. 

✅ Believe that he's just protecting you and doesn't want any other guy to notice you since you're that special to your husband.

• When your husband leaves your messages on "seen" mode or answers you with very concise sentences from time to time: 

❎ Don't speculate that he's not taking you seriously nor accuse him of being too lazy to type.

✅ Understand that he's likely very busy and intended to respond to you later but forgot to do so, or he attempted to send some replies but they could not be sent due to some technical problems or internet connection issues etc. or he's simply one of those people who dislike typing lengthy messages and he prefers to chat with you face to face.

Your husband is like a blank sheet of paper given to you by your Arts teacher who can sense that you're so creative or clever enough to use that paper in artistic and beneficial ways. If you don't have color markers, colored pencils, oil pastels or paint for coloring, you could try black and white sketching or calligraphy. If a pencil is unavailable for drawing or scribbling, you could still decorate the paper with glue, shiny glitter, colorful sequins and yarn etc. and if those items are not available, you could try origami and make paper boats, plane, hats, cups, fans, frames and paper boxes etc. with that blank sheet of paper. There should always be a solution 

Inn-sha-Allah when you wish for anything to last longer even until the next life. Why throw away that paper if you'll only receive another one which is precisely identical to the one you discarded (with possibly almost similar shortcomings and imperfections as the former one). 

~•~

📖 Thawban RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whenever a woman asks her husband for a divorce without a strong reason, the fragrance of Paradise becomes forbidden for her."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 2226

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut

📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations. One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'"

Source: Sahih Muslim 2813

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

https://abukhadeejah.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Righteous-Wife-P1-WEB-7.3-Print-Complete.pdf

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/poem-love-your-husband-for-allah-dont.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/poem-if-my-husband-wanted-divorce-id.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/07/poem-seven-reasons-why-divorce-is-more.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-demerits-of-divorce.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-three-tips-to-preserve-your.html  

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-dismiss-shaytans-whispers-as-he.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/09/tips-5-probable-reasons-why-shaytan.html

Poem: Yes I Deserve Better Which Is Why I'll Still Love My Husband For Allah's Sake With More Sabr

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 If I were told "Divorce him. You deserve much better." 

Or "Search for another guy. There are many out there 

Who than your husband are more good-looking and richer", 

I'd go: Are you joking? Do you think another guy 

Would solve all problems while he too has countless errors? 

~•~

That guy would be like my husband - not perfect either, 

Not flawless, not always cautious of what he utters, 

Not at all times aware of what's no laughing matter, 

Not devoid of emotions which frequently alter 

Choices, not free from chances of falling for others.

~•~

He'd be like my spouse in some ways, but one thing for sure 

He's not my zawj in being part of Allah's Qadr. 

My husband, I firmly believe is Allah's Answer 

To one of my prayers when I was a teenager. 

Yes, I prayed for a future spouse; I'm not a liar.

~•~

Why should I divorce him? Why waste all that large mahar? 

Why waste the moments he and I enjoyed together? 

Why waste the money spent on gifts we gave each other? 

Why quickly give up as if you can't find another 

Solution to some problems likely found in others?

~•~

Yes, I deserve better, which is why my spouse/partner 

Isn't around daily so I can have more Ajr 

And rewards in striving to maintain patience/Sabr. 

I'd rather love for Allah's sake than be a loser 

In showing one's pride is greater than Faith and Sabr.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e. her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious (righteous Muslimah) woman (otherwise) you will be a loser." 

Sahih Al-Bukhari 5090

In-book reference: Book 67 Hadith 28

USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 7, Book 62, Hadith 27 

📖 Thawban RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whenever a woman asks her husband for a divorce without a strong reason, the fragrance of Paradise (Jannah) becomes forbidden for her."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 2226

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut 

📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations (mischief, trouble). One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'" 

Source: Sahih Muslim 2813 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

https://abukhadeejah.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Righteous-Wife-P1-WEB-7.3-Print-Complete.pdf

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/10/note-intj-muslim-wife-on-divorce-fierce.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/poem-if-my-husband-wanted-divorce-id.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-demerits-of-divorce.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/10/poem-divorce-is-permissible-but-its.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2023/09/poem-if-divorce-was-door-id-never-want.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2023/01/note-on-patience-with-my-dear-husband.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/poem-men-who-are-blessed-to-be-married.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/09/tips-5-probable-reasons-why-shaytan.html 

Note: Some Reminders From An INTJ Muslimah (33)

 

Note: Having More Fans, Followers And Subscribers Than Someone Does Not Always Mean That Allah Loves You More Than Them

 Allah the Almighty knows best. 

Having more "fans", "admirers", "followers" and subscribers on social media than so-and-so does not always mean that Allah the Almighty loves you a lot more than that person.

 

Our accursed enemy shaytan has lots of puppets and supporters worldwide yet he's the worst of all created beings. 

A real diamond or jewelry made of pure gold left on the ground by itself at one corner will always be more valuable than a full trash bin surrounded by tons of flies, mosquitoes and worms.

📖 Sa'd Ibn Abi Waqqas RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah loves a servant who is righteous, independent, and obscure (not popular or well-known)."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2965

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Three things follow a deceased person (to the person's grave). Two of them return and one remains. His family, his wealth, and his deeds follow him. His family and wealth return, but his deeds remain (with the dead in their graves)."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6149 

Sahih Muslim 2960

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-with-or-without-many-friends-what.html 

Note: Some Reminders From An INTJ Muslimah (32)

 

Note: Some Reminders From An INTJ Muslimah (31)

 

Note: Eleven Sweet Things From Countless Favors Done By My Dear Husband As An Ambitious ESFJ 3w2

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💚 Eleven cute and sweet things which my dear husband has done, as an ESFJ 3w2, that inspired me to love him even more for Allah's sake (Alhamdulillah):

1🔹 Frequently cooking and preparing many of our meals during the first weeks of us getting married (our marriage Alhamdulillah took place in Shawwaal, after Ramadan. He was 28 while I was 20 that time) Alhamdulillah while I set the table and did the dishes.

2🔹 Playing badminton with me before he became busy with work and being admirably patient with how I'm not really good at sports in general. 

3🔹 Answering a lot of my questions whenever he's in the mood to talk even if some of them are so random and weird. 

4🔹 Feeling visibly upset when he tried his best to send me with one of his cars to the house of a Tausug family for a visit and he had a tough time searching for their residence, then looking so concerned when I told him it's okay I can try walking to their place since it's not far away. 

5🔹 Cheerfully making the Korean finger heart gesture when saying goodbye to us after we quickly visited him at the clinic where he works as a medical doctor. 

6🔹 Thoughtfully reminding me to make sure that I pray all of my prayers as properly as I can with Khushoo' tranquility. 

7🔹 Encouraging me to be more lenient, empathic and understanding towards others. 

8🔹 Easily telling jokes and observing how his cute sense of humor makes him more handsome whenever he tries to share some smiles and laughter. 

9🔹 Regularly buying souvenirs for his family and loved ones after arriving from a long trip or travel (even for some of his colleagues at the clinic he works in) whenever he can afford (like when he traveled to China some years ago and Saudi Arabia recently).

10🔹 Accepting some of the strange requests I often ask him to do like that time when I asked him to have his voice recorded so I can use his recording as the sound for my cellphone alarm and when he accepted my invitation to take some MBTI personality and enneagram tests online.

11🔹 When he lovingly demonstrated and taught me how to wash clothes by hand (including several of my niqabs) since I was more accustomed to using the washing machine back in Riyadh city.

~•~

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The best of you are the best to their women."

Source: Sunan Ibn Mājah 1978

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://abukhadeejah.com/characteristics-of-a-righteous-wife-in-light-of-the-quran-and-sunnah-part-1/

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/07/note-esfj-husband-and-intj-wife.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/12/note-how-intj-wife-connects-with-her.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/07/note-esfj-husband-and-intj-wife.html 

https://personalitygrowth.com/a-better-understanding-of-the-esfj-male/

Note: Some Reminders From An INTJ Muslimah (30)

 

Poem: Have Good Thoughts About Allah The Almighty And Think Well Of Yourself

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Don't just be kind to others but be nice to yourself.

Think well of Allah and positive thoughts that can help 

You as a Muslim and in your emotional health.

With trust in Allah and good mindset, good moods are felt.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I failed again. I'm a failure.

A loser." Believe that you're a winner with Sabr.

You thrive if you patiently accept Allah's Qadr, 

Inspired to do better to win in the Hereafter.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I'm crazy for falling in love

Irresistibly with someone whom I cannot have." 

Believe you are being tested by Allah Above. 

Pass tests with Taqwa and Du'as. Know you're strong enough.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I'm useless, boring as can be.

I'm worthless." Recall your purpose and best qualities.

To be Allah's loyal slave is a noble duty. 

By serving Allah rightly, you're special already.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I'm lonely. Nobody loves me."

Be contented with Allah's Love, Guidance and Mercy, 

Aware that Angels are nearby recording daily, 

And what remain with you after death are your good deeds.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I'm ugly. I hate my physique."

Remember Allah designed you so you look unique. 

Adorn your heart with faith, accepting Allah's Decree, 

And note your acts, not appearance, are what Allah sees.

~•~

Instead of thinking, "I'm so poor. I can't afford much." 

Understand that your wealth come from Allah the Most Just.

Focus on what Allah chose for you, not what you lack.

Aim for Jannah's rewards, not dunya's joys that distract.

~•~ 

Instead of thinking, "I'm too tired. Stressed. Can't live this way."

Believe that when Allah loves you, trials escalate.

Whenever you slip, rise and stand wiser from mistakes.

To stop shaytan's plots for you to quit be unafraid.

~•~

Think well of Allah Almighty, the Most Kind and Just.

Practice positive self-talk. Pursue what Allah loves.

Acknowledge that hardships are there for sins to be washed 

And Allah often tests us because by Him we're loved.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Allah the Almighty says: 'I am as My servant expects Me and I am with him as he remembers Me. If he remembers Me in himself, then I will remember him in Myself. If he mentions Me in a gathering, then I will mention him in a larger gathering. When he draws near to Me by the span of his hand, I draw near him by the length of a cubit. When he draws near Me by the length of a cubit, I draw near him by the length of a fathom. When he comes to Me walking, I will come to him running.'"

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6970

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah has pardoned my nation for what occurs within themselves (evil thoughts or feelings), as long as they do not speak of it or act upon it."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6287

Sahih Muslim 127

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah’s noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

🌼

https://abukhadeejah.com/how-to-ask-allah-for-wellbeing-safety-security-in-these-difficult-times/

Tips: 11 Ways To Respond To "You're So Cringe" Or "So Cringey"

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 Eleven clever comebacks that you can say to someone who tells you "you're so cringe" or "you're so cringey": 

1. "I think you're mistaking me for a different person. I'm not your mom or dad. And I would never want to adopt you, even if I were bribed to do so with a million cash, because of your ugly character." 

2. "And you're so bland and boring. I'd rather babysit sloths for three hours than be you for one millisecond." 

3. "Do you always do that? Walk towards people whom you're intensely jealous of and vocalize your nonsensical misjudgment?"

4. "You think I'm cringey? I think you're unoriginal. Yay for freedom of speech." 

5. "You're so ignorance." 

6. "And? You want me to cry the way you probably sometimes do whenever you recall your parents' refusal to give you proper attention, so they failed at educating you basic good manners? Sorry. I can't relate to you." 

7. "That's not my name. Don't be such a liar. Lying to yourself and others is unattractive." 

8. "Is that your way of begging? Are you begging for some money? Attention? Or both money and my attention?" 

9. "Why are you a bully-wannabe? Is that what your parents have always been wanting you to be? An oversized brat acting obnoxiously to distract yourself from your misery and insecurities?"

10. "And you're the only one who's perfect? Absolutely impeccable and impossibly flawless? No? Then you're cringey too." 

11. "If by 'cringe' you mean cute/cool, resilient, inspiring, nifty, gifted and excellent, then I'd gladly say Alhamdulillah I am more "cringe" than you."

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever wrongs his brother in his honor or anything else should resolve the matter today before it cannot be resolved with gold and silver coins. If he has good deeds to his credit, they will be taken from him according to the measure of his injustice. If he has no good deeds left, he will bear the evil deeds of the one he has oppressed."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 2317

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari

📖 Abu Darda RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Nothing is heavier upon the scale of a believer on the Day of Resurrection than his good character. Verily, Allah hates the vulgar and obscene person (prone to wicked conduct and vile speech such as purposely telling lies, backbiting, spreading rumors)."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2002

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah’s noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah (The Almighty), and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.’ Rather say: 'Allah has decreed what He wills.' Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-please-only-allah.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2023/07/tips-nine-comebacks-when-insecure.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2023/12/tips-different-ways-to-respond-when.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2024/05/tips-eleven-comebacks-you-can-say-to.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2023/12/tips-11-comebacks-when-arrogant.html 

Note: Some Reminders From An INTJ Muslimah (29)