Tips: Who Are Your Mahrams And Non-Mahrams?

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Something that not many people are aware of yet is that since the male cousins of a Muslim woman are not her mahram, her cousins' sons are also not her mahram. Even if someone complains with "but they call me 'auntie', therefore they're my nephews!" or "wouldn't it be weird to marry your cousin's son?", what Allah the Almighty and His noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam say are much more important than people's opinions.

In Surah An-Noor, verse 31, where a Muslim woman's mahrams are mentioned, her cousins and cousins' sons are not included. This is evidence that a woman's male cousins and "nephews" through her cousins are marriageable, and they can't be counted as a mahram to accompany her on long journeys, travel, Hajj and Umrah pilgrimage. 

🗒️ The following are your mahrams as a Muslimah: 

Your father, your mother's father, your father's father, your grandfather's father, your brother, your brother's sons, your mother's brothers (your maternal uncles), your father's brothers (your paternal uncles), your husband's sons from his other wife, your husband's father or your father-in-law, your sister's sons, the sons of your nephews from your brother or sister, your half-brother (your father's sons from his other wife), your foster brother (who was breastfed by your mother at least five times) and your son-in-law. If you have a daughter and she marries your cousin's son, her husband becomes your legal mahram.

📋 What you can do with your male mahrams: 

1) They can accompany you for shopping, traveling, and performing Hajj or Umrah.

2) They are allowed to see your hair, face and arms.

3) You can shake hands with them.

4) You can briefly hug them if they arrived from travel, if you haven't seen each other in a long time, or if they passed away.

5) They can be your guardian concerning witnessing and signing marriage contract, or accepting or declining marriage proposals from suitors.

🗒️ The following are not your mahrams: 

Your male cousins whether they are your first-degree, second-degree or third-degree cousins, their sons and the sons of their sons, your husband's brothers whether they are his half-brothers, his stepbrothers, or his foster brothers, your sister's husband, the husbands of your nieces from your cousins, the male cousins of your mother and father, and any man who is not closely connected through family ties.

📋 What you must do around non-mahram males:

1) Maintain your hijaab, niqaab and modesty around them.

2) Avoid being too overly friendly and flirtatious towards them.

3) You can't consider them as a mahram, shopping buddy and travel companion.

4) Don't shake hands with them, poke their shoulders, or tap their backs to get their attention.

5) They are marriageable to you and your daughters if one of them is interested in marrying.

~•~

📖 Jabir Ibn Abdullah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever has faith/Imaan in Allah and the Last Day, let him not be alone with an unrelated woman (non-mahram female) without her guardian (mahram). Verily, the third of them is shaytan."

Source: Musnad Ahmed 14241

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "It is not lawful for a woman who has faith/Imaan in Allah and the Last Day to travel for a day and a night without her guardian (mahram)."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 1038 

Sahih Muslim 1339

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

📖 Narrated `Uqba Ibn 'Amir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Beware of entering upon the ladies." A man from the Ansaar said, "O' Allah's Messenger! What about Al-Hamu (the male in-laws of the wife like the brothers of her husband or his nephews etc.)?" The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam answered: "The in-laws of the wife are death itself." 

Reference: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5232In-book reference: Book 67 

Hadith 165USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 7, Book 62, Hadith 159

https://www.abukhadeejah.com/mind-map-illustration-showing-the-mahrams-male-chaperones-of-a-woman-for-travel-and-sittings/

https://binbaz.org.sa/fatwas/15442/%D8%B5%D9%81%D8%A9-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B1%D8%B6%D8%A7%D8%B9-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%85%D8%AD%D8%B1%D9%85

Note: The Permissibility For The Husband To Suck Or Fondle His Wife's Breasts

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

📜 Question: Can the husband be breastfed by his wife (as part of sexual activity)?

📝 Answer: There is no problem in that. If he sucked her breast, it doesn't harm him, even if he swallowed some bit of breast milk it doesn't harm (it doesn't transform him into her "foster son"), because breastfeeding the adult does not affect anything, according to the majority of scholars. Nonetheless, it is better for a man to avoid it, specially if there is no need for it. 

A husband's act of sucking his wife's breasts whether he does it playfully, as part of foreplay, or to show affection, doesn't harm him even if he was able to swallow some breast milk. She still remains as his wife and he doesn't become his son through breastfeeding. However avoiding it is better for the husband and wife.

From the Fataawa of sheikh AbdulAziz Ibn Baz (May Allah have mercy on him. Ameen.)

~•~

https://binbaz.org.sa/fatwas/25634/%D8%AD%D9%83%D9%85-%D8%B1%D8%B6%D8%A7%D8%B9%D8%A9-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B2%D9%88%D8%AC-%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%AB%D8%AF%D9%8A-%D8%B2%D9%88%D8%AC%D8%AA%D9%87

https://youtu.be/2jLq194Ossw

Note: It Is Permissible To Remember Allah And Say Du'a Even If One Hasn't Performed Wudhu/Ablution

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

📜 Question: Is it allowed/permissible to say Du'a during times outside of prayer, and the person is not in a state of purity (didn't perform wudhu/ablution), for instance when one is at work? Can one's supplication be responded to in this situation?

📝 Answer: Saying Du'a is legislated in every time, and it is not a condition to be in a state of purity. You may say Du'a in all circumstances, whether you are in a state of purity or janaaba (sexual impurity), or you are upon minor impurity (your wudhu/ablution was invalidated), or a woman is having her monthly period (menstruation) or nifaas (postpartum bleeding), saying Du'a is required or encouraged, as well as saying Dhikr. And from the Adhkaar which we can regularly say are: SubhanAllah, Alhamdulillah, Laa ilaaha ilAllah, and Allahu Akbar. Remembering Allah the Almighty can be done in any situation, even a woman is allowed to say Dhikr while she is menstruating or she has nifaas (postpartum bleeding), and the person who is in a state of janaaba (sexual impurity).

 'Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated that the beloved Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam would remember Allah whenever he could at all times. Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala says, "Verily, in the creation of the heavens and the earth and the alternation of the night and day are signs for those with reason (understanding, insight, enlightenment)." [Surah Aal-'Imraan verse 190] and Allah the Most Merciful says, "...those who remember Allah standing, and sitting, and on their sides."  [Surah Aal-'Imraan verse 191] 

So it is legislated for the believer to say Du'a in all circumstances. What is specifically forbidden for the person is reciting any verse from the Noble Qur'an while they are in a state of janaaba (sexual impurity). 

And Allah the Most Kind says, "So once the prayer is completed, disperse throughout the land and seek from the bounty of Allah and remember Allah much so you become successful." [Surah Al-Jumuah verse 10] 

The believer is ordered to remember Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, saying Dhikr, always whether one is standing, sitting or reclining on one's side, and whether one is in a state of purity or not. When it comes to reciting some verses (aayaat) from the Noble Qur'an particularly, the Muslim can only recite if they are in a state of purity.

From the Fataawa of sheikh AbdulAziz Ibn Baz (May Allah have mercy on him. Ameen.)

~•~

https://binbaz.org.sa/fatwas/19913/%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%AF%D8%B9%D8%A7%D8%A1-%D9%8A%D8%B4%D8%B1%D8%B9-%C2%A0%D9%81%D9%8A-%D9%83%D9%84-%D9%88%D9%82%D8%AA%C2%A0%D9%88%D9%84%D9%8A%D8%B3-%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%B4%D8%B1%D8%B7%D9%87-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B7%D9%87%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%A9

Poem: Confessions Of A Wife Who Welcomes Polygyny

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Confessions of a wife who welcomes polygyny 

To her husband whom she loves for Allah sincerely:

Dear zawjy, the fact that I'm fine if you remarry 

Doesn't mean my love is fake and it lacks jealousy. 

~•~

I do feel jealous for you now and then, believe me, 

Specially when some wives see their men nearly daily, 

While you and I meet just once a week or bimonthly. 

Nonetheless my respect for your rights proves it's all real.

~•~

If Allah the Almighty permits you to marry 

Another lady, while you have the financial means, 

And you aim to increase the size of your family, 

I'll patiently accept and welcome Allah's Decree.

~•~

Your love for the second wife won't cause mine to decrease.

Instead, my love for you will grow stronger stubbornly, 

Eager to compete regarding patience, piety, 

Good manners and contentment with Allah's Destiny.

~•~

When you and the other wife fight occasionally, 

I won't be hoping that she'll hate you so she can leave. 

I'd say Du'a, pray for you both from behind the scenes, 

That you'll forgive each other so our fam is complete. 

~•~

And when there are moments when you seem to neglect me, 

Due to work or someone else intruding pridefully, 

I'd ask Allah for strength to forgive you readily, 

Not wanting shaytan's tricks nor sorcery to succeed.

~•~

Dear husband and friend whom I love with fierce loyalty, 

I confess I can't control your love's intensity. 

Love your wives as you like, but ensure it's done fairly. 

I don't want you suffering at all because of me.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 4252

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi

Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātih 5/2125

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim