بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين

بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين
May Allah the Almighty grant us more beneficial knowledge, accept our good deeds, forgive our mistakes, protect us from fitna, and join us with the righteous believers in Jannatul Ferdaus. Ameen.

Friday, February 17, 2023

Tips: Don't Bother Trying To Reconnect With Jealous Narcissists Who Are Too Proud To Forgive You

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📜 Question: A group of friends and I had a falling-out (silly argument). I approached them to apologize for whatever I did that offended them but they still refuse to treat me in a friendly way like they used to. They even deleted me from their group chat and unfriended me on social media. What can I do to become close to them again? 
📝 Answer: A group of sad clowns, sorry, individuals with such gigantic ego and lousy oversensitivity, who are too obsessed with themselves that they can't let go of the past drama, aren't worthy of your companionship and attention. There's a stronger reason to avoid them for Allah's sake if they happen to be toxic narcissists who are excessively attached to this transient dunya while they fail so badly to inspire you to become a better Muslim. 
If Allah the Almighty observed any goodness in their hearts, He Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala could have guided them to becoming softhearted and humble enough to forgive you. Perhaps Allah the Most Wise allowed them to drift apart to protect you and your faith Imaan from their negative vibes, obnoxious competition accompanied by jealousy among themselves regarding materialism and ridiculous stuff, and their awful tendency of probably gossiping about you when you weren't listening to their absolute nonsense.
Imagine them being worms, snakes or leeches that decide to slither away from you once they discovered that you're a genuine diamond, with a tough surface, or "you can't mess around with me" persona that intimidates them, and they realized you can't provide them with the substance they're desperately searching for. To them, you can't spoil them with false flattery so they choose to avoid you. They're absolutely terrified of getting caught for concealing some ugly lies and invented tales about themselves to appear less plain or tedious, so they frequently exclude you from their shallow gatherings to make you feel as insecure and inwardly gloomy as they are because they despise seeing you cheerful, thriving and contented. 
Attain inner peace in patiently accepting Allah's Qadr/Decree and remind yourself that you weren't created in such a way to be appealing to every single soul whom Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala wants you to meet. Inevitably the more you appear successful or the more you emit good vibes due to strong faith Imaan, Taqwa and inner beauty, the more you may encounter envious females who resent you for being able to do multiple things which they can't carry out (for instance being capable of communicating in Arabic language Alhamdulillah or being one of the few formidable Muslimahs who are fine with polygyny etc.) or haven't yet accomplished. 
Don't force yourself to become "friends" again with people whose despicable pride and ignorance about Islam overshadow their willingness to demonstrate beautiful character. Who cares if they don't like you back, and why bother wishing to be liked by them if they, due to their insecurities, envy and inward misery, likely abhor themselves so much so that they are unwilling to beautify their souls with the strength to pardon other Muslims for Allah's sake? 
For Allah's sake move on confidently, unapologetically unfollow those who are too spiteful and sorrowful to be followed, and focus on doing what you believe can lead you closer to Allah's Love regardless of how His servants perceive us.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The souls are conscripted soldiers. They come together upon what they recognize, and they differ upon what they reject." 
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3109
Sahih Muslim 2638 
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Faith (Imaan) and envy do not combine within a believing servant."
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Greed and faith are never combined in the heart of a servant."
Source: Sunan Al-Nasā’ī 3109
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 
📖 Aslam Al-Habashi RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Umar Ibn Al-Khattab RadhiAllahu 'anhu said, "Let not your love be infatuation and let not your hatred be destruction." It was said, "How is this?" Umar RadhiAllahu 'anhu said, "When you love someone, you become infatuated (obsessed) like a child. When you hate someone, you want destruction for your companion (sister or brother in Islam)."
Source: Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 1322
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
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Tips: Dealing With Awkward Moments As An INTJ Personality Type

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📜 Question: As a Muslim whose MBTI personality type is INTJ, how do you handle awkward situations? 
📝 Answer: Three examples of "awkward" moments I went through and sometimes do but I don't find them that bothersome: 
1] During our first years of settling in the Philippines after moving from Saudi Arabia when I was trying to practice Tagalog language, I told a salesperson something like "oh buntis ka? Ilan months buntis (pregnant)?" to which the person answered "lalaki ako" meaning "I'm a guy." and I responded with something like "oh sorry, ha! 
(A)kala ko babae ka" (I thought you're female). 
2] Asking an individual "how are you? And so how are you?" (like a malfunctioned android robot) a number of times in one conversation or too frequently in one day when I've already asked them how they're doing upon our initial greeting. 
3] Appearing ignorant when it comes to "formal dining" as the handle of the spoon or fork I'd be using would become messy at times, which is usually why I prefer to ask the staff at most restaurants where the washbasin is to wash my hands and eat with the right than struggle with utensils. 
➡️ How to avoid "awkward" moments: 
1] Think very carefully before you decide to do something and reflect in advance on the probable outcomes of your actions. 
2] Thoroughly analyze your surroundings and see if the environment or condition you're in is convenient or ideal for you to proceed with the task you're about to carry out. 
3] Considerately put yourself in the shoes of the other individual or group and imagine how they may react to your statements or feel about you after behaving in a certain way. 
Those three points are some of the things which a lot of INTJs consider unimportant or unnecessary since they prefer to be direct and straightforward, eager to achieve their goals efficiently without giving too much thought on people's emotions and opinions. This is why looking "awkward" isn't that big of a deal for us.
☑️ Some tips on dealing with "awkward" situations: 
1• Always live life to please and serve Only Allah the Almighty regardless of how His servants perceive you. As long as you believe that you're doing the right thing, without causing deliberate injury to anybody, you shouldn't care about how people view you. They're imperfect and prone to encountering "awkward" situations too.
2• Be aware that every feeling which you allow or encourage yourself to feel on earth is temporary. Feelings of "awkwardness" or slight "embarrassment" will 
Inn-sha-Allah gradually subside, especially if you busy yourself with more productive, meaningful and rewarding activities including reading from the Noble Qur'an with sincere intention and saying some Adhkaar regularly.
3• Be humble enough to recall that you're a human being, so it's normal to make errors now and then. Learn from your mistakes and others' faults, and avoid repeating them as much as possible. 
Being able to laugh at yourself when you make a mistake shows confidence and implies you are not the type of person to let temporary and trivial issues affect how you feel from inside. 
Shame or disgrace on the Day of Judgment is a lot worse than feeling temporarily "ashamed" or "awkward" in this transitory dunya. 
May Allah the Most Merciful always protect us from actual humiliation in both worlds. Ameen.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day (the Day of Judgement), let him speak goodness or remain silent. Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his neighbor. Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his guest."
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam, "Let him not harm his neighbor."
And in another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Let him uphold family ties."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5672
Sahih Muslim 47
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "May Allah have mercy on a person who spoke rightly and was rewarded, or who was silent and remained safe."
Source: Shu’b Al-Imān 4579
Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise for one who leaves arguments even if he is right, and a house in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lies even when joking, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character excellent."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4800
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
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Thursday, February 16, 2023

Note: Wretched Couples VS Truly Contented And Blessed Muslim Couples / Spouses

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
📝 Five qualities of wretched couples who deserve each other and who aren't worthy of envy and admiration at all: 
1:- They ignorantly disbelieve in Allah the Almighty and don't know how to properly worship Him Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala. 
2:- They lack the enthusiasm and sincerity to learn more about the truth Islam. They'd rather stay misguided or delusional than educated and well-informed. 
3:- They resemble each other in being awfully narcissistic, egoistic and obnoxiously full of themselves, appallingly obsessed with materialism or excessive consumerism. 
4:- Although they try to appear contented and confident, inwardly they're actually unsatisfied with what Allah the All-Knowing granted them while they are consistently prone to feeling intensely envious of other individuals. Their discontentment with themselves is revealed through their lousy lack of basic good manners and their inability to quit immature acts such as gossiping and instantly trusting nonsensical rumors. 
5:- They're both incompetent at controlling their gaze, casually mingling with non-mahrams of the opposite gender on a regular basis, and exactly alike in disloyalty, frequently checking out or flirting with multiple strangers despicably. 
✅ Five signs that you and your Muslim spouse are blessed by Allah the Most Merciful to be married to each other: 
1💚 This marriage which Allah the Most Wise has destined actually causes your faith Imaan to strengthen and brings you both closer to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala. Thus, there's no remorse at all in marrying each other sincerely for Allah's sake. 
2💚 Through loving each other for Allah's sake, regardless of how busy you both can be, you're mutually enlightened and motivated to study about Islam whenever you can, striving to inspire each other (directly and indirectly) to increase in doing righteous deeds which please Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala. 
3💚 Not only has your eagerness to learn more about Islam increased, with Allah's Will and through this pure love, but you and your husband have also improved a lot in gratitude, humility, patience, adulting and empathy. 
4💚 As much as possible you and your soulmate avoid unnecessarily mixing with non-mahrams and behaving indecently with strangers. You both are knowledgeable about the true concept of loyalty. 
5💚 Instead of being selfish and overly attached to dunya, you and your other half strive to generously do Da'wah and charity whenever you can for Allah's sake. You can tell that your marriage is 
Inn-sha-Allah an enormous blessing when becoming a better and wiser Muslim has been attained.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "The most complete of believers in faith are those with the best character, and the best of you are the best in behavior to their women."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1162
Grade: Sahih 
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."
Source: Sahih Muslim 1467
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 
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Wednesday, February 15, 2023

Note: INTJ 1w9

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 Seven things which you may relate to if you're an INTJ personality type with enneagram 1w9: 
1] While you're thick-skinned, confident and unafraid of criticism, you avoid socializing as much as possible with unreliable individuals whose negative vibes you despise.
2] You don't oblige yourself to appear likable to every single individual you meet. If somebody is unwilling to reciprocate your attempts to befriend them, you eventually stop trying to develop the connection since you generally abhor wasting time on anything unfeasible or unreasonable.
3] If you seem helpful and cooperative at times, your willingness to cooperate and show support isn't due to wanting appreciation and validation but you strive to do what you believe is right because of your moral values and integrity. You care more about justice and etiquettes than people's perception of you.
4] Oftentimes you're about to share a joke or comment which you think is amusing but you abstain from doing so not necessarily to spare someone's feelings but because it includes a lie, and intentionally spreading misinformation isn't something you enjoy. 
5] You tend to respect or incline to those who do whatever they can to stay away from ignorance, injustice, acting on despicable jealousy, unreliability, undue discrimination, debts and deception. 
6] Being described as "weird", "awkward", "scary", "intimidating" or "annoying" doesn't bother you, as you're not the type of person who is easily influenced by people's opinions. 
7] You're not interested in following the content and posts of users who fail to inspire you to become a better human being. If an acquaintance is clearly incompatible with you, you simply refrain from paying close attention to them and almost never take their statements or acts seriously.
~•~
📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise for one who leaves arguments even if he is right, and a house in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lies even when joking, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character excellent."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4800
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi 
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe (not guilty of backbiting, knowingly telling lies, and deliberately committing injustice). The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. 
By the One (Allah the Almighty) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."
Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut 
📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "You must be truthful. Verily, truthfulness leads to righteousness and righteousness leads to Paradise. A man continues to be truthful and encourages honesty until he is recorded with Allah as a truthful person. And beware of falsehood. Verily, falsehood leads to wickedness and wickedness leads to the Hellfire. A man continues to tell lies and encourages falsehood until he is recorded with Allah as a liar."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhāri 5743 
Sahih Muslim 2607
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
✅ Some MBTI tests which you can try taking online to discover more about yourself and other personality types:
~•~

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Tuesday, February 14, 2023

Tips: Some Advice On How To Behave Around Those Who Feel Resentful Towards You

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Some tips on how you can behave in the presence of somebody who clearly doesn't like you and it's obvious that they don't have any interest in trying to get to know you better, whether they're a colleague and you're attending a meeting, they're a schoolmate and you're in the cafeteria, or they're a relative or casual acquaintance and you're both guests at the same wedding:
1] Patiently accept the fact that Allah the Almighty didn't destine you two to get along harmoniously. You can't force individuals to connect if Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala doesn't want such connection to take place. 
2] Maintain good manners and etiquettes, as much as possible, with every soul whom Allah the Most Wise decrees you'd meet. Disliking a person for some of their attributes or actions which you disagree with shouldn't provoke you to act like an oppressive tyrant. 
3] You have every right to decide not to sit near individuals whom you know despise you, especially if you're uncomfortable with their vibes and/or you don't wish to overhear irrelevant conversations. If in some cases you must be seated beside someone who despises you as much as you loathe them, do whatever you can to avoid unwelcome physical contact and refrain from looking at them whenever they speak to others, to signal you're uninterested in what they have to say and you don't desire any drama. 
4] During breaks or intermissions, converse with somebody whom you genuinely care about for Allah's sake, read some beneficial writings or do some productive tasks on your cellphone or laptop, or temporarily leave the area where the individuals who can't stand you are, then return when the necessary activities resume. Don't oblige yourself to act concerned or curious about some people if begrudgingly chatting with them is more disadvantageous than uplifting. 
5] Avoiding pointless interactions with individuals who hold a grudge against you is almost similar to intentionally staying away from touching objects at a store which aren't useful for you. Don't feel apologetic or guilty about your indifference towards them, specifically if most of their goals and values contradict yours. 
While we can't control how Allah's servants view us or feel about us, we have the freewill to choose how to respond to their feelings and perceptions. Every action we humans do on purpose has its consequences, and Allah's Justice always prevails if not in this fleeting world then on the Day of Judgment. 
Incompatibility mustn't cause us to commit sins such as deceiving, backbiting, stealing, denying people what is rightfully theirs, and oppressing.
~•~
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The souls are conscripted soldiers. They come together upon what they recognize, and they differ upon what they reject." 
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3109
Sahih Muslim 2638 
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his close friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi 
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