Poem: Why I'm Okay With Polygyny

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 Although my husband's lips have touched another woman's,
And with that other woman he's blessed with two children,
I continue loving him, and he's still my husband.
Our love was written by Allah Who planned this union.
~•~
It's a permission from Allah, not obligation,
For men to marry more for additional blessings -
Husbands who are capable without finance problems,
For wives whose love for Allah exceeds their emotions.

~•~

As a Muslim, don't question Allah's Laws and Wisdom.
Allah's Legislations come with purpose and reasons.
Polygyny is for those who desire more children,
And who wish to increase the Ummah's population.

~•~

It trains women to be patient, tough, independent,
Reliant upon Allah with peaceful contentment,
Confident of Allah's Love, knowing their men love them,
Preferring Jannah's bliss over worldly enjoyment.

~•~

Polygyny trains men to thrive at time management,
Raising big families without any negligence,
Comforting each wife with justice and reassurance
That Jannah is our goal and this world's not permanent.
~•~

This love is a blessing when it's an encouragement
To love Allah much more than I love my own husband,
Not forgetting my rights nor my man's expectations,
Striving to keep this connection strong with sweet patience.
~•~
True love for Allah's sake is what keeps this bond strengthened,
Despite not savoring my man's presence each second.
I pray that Paradise is our place of reunion,
As a prize for patiently loving my other half. Ameen.
~•~

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu alaihi wa sallam said:

"The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu alaihi wa sallam said, “If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband.”

Source: Sunan Al-Tirmidhi 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Tirmidhi 

Ali Al-Qari said, “That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah.”

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātīḥ 5/2125

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-my-answer-to-what-made-you-accept.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-seven-misconceptions-about.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/tips-when-is-polygyny-better-than.html 

https://abukhadeejah.com/characteristics-of-a-righteous-wife-in-light-of-the-quran-and-sunnah-part-1/

💚 

Tips: Some Advice To Each Muslim Wife Who Dislikes Her Husband's Attitude

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful  

📑 Nine tips to each Muslim wife who recently got married and realized she dislikes her husband’s attitude or discovered that they are both very incompatible: 

1] Remind yourself of the main reason why you willingly accepted this man’s marriage proposal – to marry for Allah’s sake and journey together to Jannah Paradise. A lot of those who get married for ulterior or selfish motives eventually break up because their niyyah / intention of marrying wasn’t a good one. 

2] Admit that you too are imperfect and there are certain aspects about yourself which your husband may not find agreeable. If you’re filled with numerous defects and shortcomings, why should you expect your spouse to be completely “flawless” and never prone to disappointing you once in a while? 

3] Try to learn from the mistakes which your husband often does and respectfully advise him on what he must do when he’s in the mood to listen. Refrain from disturbing him when he just arrived from work or you can sense that he’s struggling with depression. 

4] If there’s actually something about his personality or negative habits which you can’t stand, then clearly inform him about your disappointments in a gentle way. If you lack the confidence to verbally express your wants and needs, then demonstrate to him and indirectly teach him how to behave instead, while patiently including him in your loving Du’as, praying to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala that He keeps your marriage blessed and grants your other half more guidance to the deeds which lead to Jannatul Ferdaus.

5] Rather than focusing on your husband’s undesirable qualities, make effort to appreciate his admirable attributes and tolerable traits, such as his cute sense of humor and determination to earn halal income. 

6] Look at the bright side of your willingness to stay married with him for Allah’s sake until one of you passes away before the other. Aspire to attaining more rewards and love from Allah the Most Wise for striving to maintain patience with the man whom He Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala wisely chose for you. Being patient with your soulmate isn’t an implication that you sadistically tolerate abuse but you sincerely cherish your other half for Allah’s sake much more than your ego and pride.

7] If there’s an unresolved misunderstanding between you and your soulmate, and you’re serious about fixing the problem, courageously request some of your family members and his relatives to have a harmonious group discussion on finding effective solutions to strengthen the connection which Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala destined, or if you don’t want others to get involved, arrange a heartfelt talk with your husband when he isn’t physically and emotionally fatigued. 

8] List as many as you can all the disadvantages of insisting on asking your husband for a divorce. What makes you so sure that you won’t feel regretful once you’ve become a divorcee or several individuals regard you as notorious for having multiple divorces, particularly due to petty causes and impatience?

9] Understand that entering marriage life doesn’t mean you’ll be entirely devoid of stress, sadness and worries. When you become a wife and strive to remain loyal to your spouse for Allah’s sake, expect more challenges to arise which are designed to train you to have Sabr and Shukr for Allah’s sake as a Muslim. 

The more you pass Allah’s tests, including the different trials in your marital life, 

Inn-sha-Allah the more your status or level in Jannah Paradise may rise. 

Don’t let shaytan win against you and your husband.

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."

Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 4252

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albaani

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhī 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi

Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātih 5/2125

📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1467

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-love-for-allahs-sake-and-marriage.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/05/tips-checklist-to-determine-if-your.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/01/note-checklist-to-determine-if-your.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/note-patiently-understand-and-empathize.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/02/tips-seven-ways-to-be-respectful.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/02/poem-divorce-may-lead-to-regret-if-you.html

https://abukhadeejah.com/the-regulations-of-khula-the-annulment-of-a-marriage-at-the-request-of-the-wife/

💚

Tips: INTJ "Courtesy" vs Companionship

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 Five signs that a person whose MBTI personality type is INTJ only appears to be maintaining courtesy (especially to avoid drama), and they don't regard you as a close friend: 

1] They are reluctant to send you a "Facebook friend request" and don't bother stalking your status updates despite their awareness of the link to your online profile.

2] They remain unaffected if they notice you "unfriended" them, blocked their account, left a group chat or forum which they usually participate in, or excluded them from a gathering.

3] It is obvious that they ask other individuals more personal questions than when briefly interacting with you. If an INTJ already made a conclusion about you, for instance they realized that you're not reliable at all or they can sense that you feel so intimidated by them, they'd purposely desist from asking you random queries about yourself because they're uninterested in connecting with you on a much deeper level. 

4] All in all they're serious (aloof or emotionally detached) when you're around and they don't easily show you their goofy side. 

5] Although they're aware of where your room or residence is located, they haven't paid you a single visit within three or more months or they don't go out of their way to initiate meaningful conversations with you. 

✅ Five signs they actually like you for Allah's sake even though they seem distant most of the time: 

1] They regularly check your online posts or ask how you're doing even if it's done once a year. 

2] They make effort to pay regular visits to you, if they know where you reside, at least once every two or more months.  

3] When texting or chatting with you, a lot of their messages tend to be long as they enjoy communicating with you. 

4] They quickly defend you in your presence or absence when you're being treated or mentioned unfairly. 

5] They find many of your jokes funny and/or they're capable of patiently tolerating your dissimilarities.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever loves for the sake of Allah, hates for the sake of Allah, gives for the sake of Allah, and withholds for the sake of Allah has perfected the faith (Imaan)."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4681

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

Al-Azimabadi said, “That he hates for the sake of Allah does not mean he harms the one he hates. Rather, the hatred is for his unbelief and disobedience.”

Source: 'Awn Al-Ma’būd 4681

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his best friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/01/tips-intjs-when-they-like-you-in.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/11/note-busy-intjs-vs-avoidant-intjs.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-how-most-intj-personality-types.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/tips-intj-acquaintance-vs-intj-friend.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/01/note-signs-that-intj-doesnt-regard-you.html 

🌻 MBTI and cognitive functions test with more accurate results:

http://www.michaelcaloz.com/personality/

https://sakinorva.net/functions

https://www.idrlabs.com/test.php

https://www.idrlabs.com/cognitive-function/test.php

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

~•~

Tips: Some Questions Which You Can Ask Yourself Before You Say Yes To A Muslim's Marriage Proposal

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 Some questions which you can ask yourself before deciding to accept a Muslim's marriage proposal, after or before praying Salat Al-Istikhaara: 

1] Is this guy really a Muslim and is he upon the correct 'Aqeedah / belief (Sunni / Salafi methodology)? Or at least is he willing to learn more about the truth Islam together with me? 

2] Does he show due respect to his mother and father? Can his parents describe him as a loving son? 

3] Without making it a rule that he must have a master's or doctorate degree, can you be certain that this guy already has a stable job and the income he earns is lawful? 

4] Can he promise to let you visit your family and loved ones whenever you'd like to spend time with them? Can he guarantee that he'll try his best to avoid becoming an overly jealous, insecure and mistrustful spouse? 

5] Is it known that he tries to pray the obligatory prayers in a Masjid as promptly and regularly as he can? Can some of his relatives confirm that he's not one of those ignorant males who deny the importance of praying? 

6] If Inn-sha-Allah in the future you wish to have at least one child with this man, is there a way to prove that he isn't sterile? 

7] If you prefer to not have any or many kids with this guy, can you both agree to never allow this issue (infertility or decision to not have children together) to become a problem for the two of you? 

8] Can he assure you that 

Inn-sha-Allah if ever he wishes to remarry he'd inform you in advance and refrain from keeping his other marriages confidential? 

9] If he is employed or studying in a different city, can you imagine yourself accepting his request to relocate with him while maintaining good connection with your other loved ones? 

10] Can you visualize yourself becoming a better, more contented and more enlightened Muslimah if you accept, for Allah's sake, the marriage proposal of this Muslim man? 

11] Are you sure that you're not marrying this guy mainly for his money, to no longer be under the care of your mother and/or father, or to emulate your friends who became wives early? Can you purify your intention concerning your willingness to marry this Muslim for Allah's sake and stay true to yourself, acknowledging that you're not marrying for self-interest?

~•~ 

📖 Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated: I said, “O Messenger of Allah, should women be asked for their consent (permission) before marriage?” The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Yes." I said, “Indeed, sometimes a virgin is too shy to speak when asked.” The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Her silence (not refusing nor complaining) is her consent (sign that she accepts the marriage proposal)."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6547

Sahih Muslim 1420

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If someone proposes marriage to you whose religion and character satisfies you, then you should accept it. If you do not do so, there will be trials (fitna/fitan) on the earth and the spread of corruption."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1084

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/note-why-muslims-who-love-allah.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/poem-to-muslimahs-who-cant-decide.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/04/poem-to-each-muslimah-whos-currently.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/note-three-tips-for-single-muslimahs-on.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/03/poem-dont-marry-this-kind-of-guy.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/07/tips-be-tough-and-thick-skinned-for.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/08/note-some-reasons-why-number-of-women.html 

Poem: Recall Death More Often And Your Faith Imaan Level Can Rise

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 When we, slaves and creations of Allah the Most Wise, 

Recall that life's a test and death can come anytime, 

Accepting what Allah decrees, bestows and denies, 

With patience, becomes more manageable and worthwhile. 

Recall death more often and your faith level can rise.

~•~

When we remember the reality of this life, 

And believe that all humans will eventually die, 

Dunya's ornaments and pleasures become less admired, 

And what people possess of worldly joys won't entice

Us to envy nor entertain worries from inside.

~•~

Why desire the gifts of people which Allah decides 

To give as tests, and why remain worried when this life 

Is transient along with its trials of various kinds? 

Why worry about enjoying a lavish lifestyle 

When the grave is the next place where bodies must reside?

~•~

This life is short, death is real, and know that anytime 

We humans shall return to the One Who gave us life, 

To Allah the Almighty Who sees us day and night, 

And Who won't judge us based on how much wealth we've acquired

But on sincere efforts to earn Jannah Paradise. 

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Remember often the destroyer of pleasures," by which he meant death.

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2307

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Ibn Umar RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Be in this world as if you were a stranger or a traveler along a path."

Ibn Umar RadhiAllahu 'anhuma would say, “If you make it to the evening, do not wait for the morning. If you make it to the morning, do not wait for the evening (do not live in this dunya as though you'll remain alive forever). Take from your health for your sickness, and from your life for your death.”

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6053

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari

📖 Ibn Umar RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: A man said, "O Messenger of Allah, which of the believers is the best?" The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Those with the best character." The man said, "Which of the believers is the wisest?" The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Those who remember death often and have best prepared for it with good deeds; those are the wisest."

Source: Sunan Ibn Mājah 4259

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Albani

https://m.soundcloud.com/salafiyyah-1/death-the-destroer-of-lust-desire-hasan-as-somali 

https://binbaz.org.sa/audios/21/1--%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%AD%D8%AF%D9%8A%D8%AB-%D8%A7%D9%83%D8%AB%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%A7-%D8%B0%D9%83%D8%B1-%D9%87%D8%A7%D8%B0%D9%85-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%84%D8%B0%D8%A7%D8%AA-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%85%D9%88%D8%AA

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/07/poem-live-as-stranger-or-traveler-who.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/07/poem-what-does-actual-happiness-look.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/poem-more-we-remember-death-regularly.html