بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين

بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين
May Allah the Almighty grant us more beneficial knowledge, accept our good deeds, forgive our mistakes, protect us from fitna, and join us with the righteous believers in Jannatul Ferdaus. Ameen.

Tuesday, July 18, 2023

Tips: Nine Comebacks When Insecure Clowns Describe You Or What You're Wearing As Ugly

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 Nine comebacks which you can try saying when an inwardly unhappy and insecure individual (oversized bully) obnoxiously describes an outfit or accessory that you're wearing as "ugly" (e.g. "eww, that's an ugly watch", "what an ugly abaaya", "I think your room is ugly" etc.): 
1] "Well, that's your opinion. I like it. If you don't like something, why waste your time staring?" 
2] "Ugly to you maybe. But for me it's okay. I'm not trying to impress you nor any clown anyway." 
3] "Ugly? You mean Undeniably Good-Looking To You? Why, thank you. You're very UGLY yourself too."
4] "Not as ugly as the way your neglectful parents brought you up. They were so irresponsible that they failed to educate you about good manners. Your whole life story is an awesome epitome of the word Ugly." 
5] "I never asked you for your opinion. Go be judgmental, ugly on the inside and shallow somewhere else."
6] "Is that your favorite word or your motto? Do you blurt out 'ugly' every time your ego is provoked by jealousy? Does inner ugliness run in your family?"
7] "Is that your mating call? Is that how you flirt? Your obsession with me is not mutual. Stop being delusional and absurd."
8] "You gain nothing at all by describing this as 'ugly' except for a little sympathy from me - I feel so sorry for you that your emotional distress, insecurities and dissatisfaction with your life constantly compel you to behave so badly towards others, desperate to distract yourself from your own miseries." 
9] "Call it ugly as much as you like. The way you describe others and what they wear could actually reflect your current inner state. If you think my husband's watches are 'ugly', there's a strong possibility of you feeling seriously ugly and grouchy because you're likely overwhelmed by intense jealousy - jealous because you're still single or your so-called lover is incapable of showing you even an iota of gratitude and true loyalty."
~•~
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe (not guilty of backbiting, telling lies, and deliberately committing injustice). The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. By the One (Allah the Almighty) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."
Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah (The Almighty) wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi 
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said to me, "Young man, if you are able every morning and evening to remove any malice (hatred, grudge, spite) in your heart towards anyone, then do so." Then, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said to me, "Young man, that is my Sunnah. Whoever revives my Sunnah has loved me, and whoever loves me will be with me in (Jannah) Paradise."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2678
Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man does not accuse another man of wickedness or unbelief except that it will be turned against him if his companion is innocent."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5698
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari

Note: Quiz - If You Are Curious About Someone's Probable MBTI Personality Type (Not Necessarily Accurate)

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 Quiz, not necessarily 100% accurate, to determine somebody's probable MBTI type without directly requesting them to take several tests:
1a• Overall would you describe them as very "open" or "approachable" when around complete strangers? 
~Yes -> E (extrovert)
~No -> I (introvert)
~•~
1b• From what you've observed, are they the sort of person who's obviously selective concerning their choice of close friends, or do they seem available and ready to chat with anybody they meet? 
~They mostly seem ready to talk and build connections with different types of people -> E (extrovert)
~It's obvious that they're extremely picky regarding who they chat with -> I (introvert)
~•~
1c• Which of these two statements describe them better, more accurately: 
~Very often they can be spotted online and offline attending large gatherings, socializing during their vacant time and participating in multiple group activities -> E (extrovert)
~Most of the time you witness them quietly reading a book or article, using their cellphone or laptop, and enjoying solitude rather than mingling with people unnecessarily -> I (introvert)
~•~
2a• Would you be telling the truth if you described them as "thick-skinned" and capable of withstanding most supposedly offensive remarks and criticism without their feelings getting hurt easily?  
~Yes, I believe they don't get offended easily in general -> T (thinking type)
~No, it seems that you need to be careful with what you say and do in their presence, otherwise they may accuse you of being "mean", "insensitive" and "inconsiderate" -> F (feeling type)
~•~
2b• From your observation, are most of the decisions which they make according to what makes sense logically regardless of how they feel as well as their impact on people's emotions, or before making a decision do they ensure that their choice doesn't upset anybody including themselves?  
~They're more likely to decide based on what they believe is most logical regardless of their current emotion and people's feelings -> T (thinking type)
~It is typical for them to make sure that whatever they do and say does not ruin group harmony or negatively affect the feelings of others as well as their own -> F (feeling type)
~•~
2c• Which of these two statements describe them better, more accurately: 
~All in all, with Allah's Will, they're capable of controlling their emotions (including envy) and vividly describing their feelings is not natural for them to do -> T (thinking type)
~More than once you've witnessed them overreacting or being overly emotional when they were having an argument, or more than once you've seen them behaving irrationally, or in a passive-aggressive way, when expressing their dislike against a particular individual -> F (feeling type)
~•~
3a• Which of these sets of words more accurately describes them in general?  
~Observant, present, detailed, usually good at noticing minor blemishes or things which are not noticable to many, most of the time gets startled easily -> S (sensing type)
~Usually likes to think and plan in advance, future-oriented, willing to adjust themselves regarding plans, receptive to new ideas, most of the time unable to feel or look surprised because they correctly guessed someone's next moves or they were busy reflecting on other thoughts -> N (intuitive type)
~•~
3b• Which of these actions have you witnessed them doing more often?  
~Quickly pointing out what's wrong or out of place with something or someone, and detecting subtle changes or differentiating between objects which are nearly similar -> S (sensing type)
~Visualizing and accurately guessing someone's motives numerous times, which is why they seldom feel surprised easily, and saying something like "I knew it" or "I had a feeling so-and-so wouldn't... and I was right" etc. -> N (intuitive type)
~•~
3c• Which of these actions do you believe is a lot easier for them to do?  
~Remembering specific information about some individuals which many may not regard as memorable, and recalling the color or texture of a person's outfit -> S (sensing type)
~Taking shortcuts and being efficient when trying to accomplish a goal or complete a task, thinking of various solutions instead of sticking to just one solution when attempting to solve a problem -> N (intuitive type)
~•~
4a• From your observation, are they mostly organized and enjoy making lists? 
~Yes, most of the time they're organized and can't function well if their surroundings are chaotic -> J (judging type)
~No, they're mostly spontaneous and flexible, capable of even working amidst chaos or noisy environments -> P (perceiving type)
~•~
4b• If they were the leader of a team or group project, do you think they'd be more effective at giving out instructions and ensuring that certain rules are being followed, or would they hesitate to appear bossy and instead permit the members to do whatever they like as long as they achieve their goals? 
~They'd be more effective at giving out instructions and ensuring that certain rules are being followed -> J (judging type)
~They'd probably hate appearing bossy and instead let the members do whatever they like as long as they achieve their goals -> P (perceiving type)
~•~
4c• If they've made some errors on a page, do you think it's more natural for them to improvise and continue writing despite some scribbles, or would they feel more comfortable if they discarded that whole page to start from scratch with a completely new one? 
~They'd most likely feel more at ease if they got rid of that page and started from scratch with a completely new one -> J (judging type)
~It's more natural for them to improvise and continue writing despite the scribbles -> P (perceiving type)
~•~
( Related to cognitive functions )
Which of these phrases are they more likely to say more frequently: 
Si vs Se
•Si: "This reminds me of...", "I remember that time when..." or "It has always been done that way. Don't change..." [   ]
•Se: "I saw it very clearly...", "What's that you're wearing/carrying? Can I see?" or "I won't believe you until you show me..." [   ]

Ni vs Ne 
•Ni: "I have a feeling they'll cancel the appointment...again.", "I knew she'd say that. I'm not surprised at all." or "I can imagine precisely why he didn't do such and such..." [   ]
•Ne: "Let's try this...and if it doesn't work out then we could...", "In my imagination I can list more than a dozen of things we could do with this interesting item" or "More options please, not just two..." [   ]

Fi vs Fe
•Fi: "I'll be respectful to you if you show respect to me. If you're disrespectful, how do you expect me to treat you respectfully.", "No way am I sacrificing my values just to maintain group harmony" or "I genuinely don't care about people's opinions of me as long as I sincerely love what I do" [   ]
•Fe: "I have to do this because if I don't, then what will the people say about me?", "Of course I care about you, but I also care about the wellness of the group as a whole" or "I'm sorry I can't announce the bad news. I don't wish to hurt my colleague's feelings..." [   ]

Ti vs Te
•Ti: "Will you please shut up and allow me to analyze...", "Give me some time to evaluate, then (Inn-sha-Allah) I'll get back to you..." or "Wait... what they said didn't make sense at all, it's ridiculously illogical..." [   ]
•Te: "The process doesn't really matter. I care about the outcomes, the output and results.", "Get done with it by this time and date, otherwise forget about it and don't bother contacting me" or "There has to be something productive I can do at this event. I abhor staying idle doing nothing..." [   ]

The 16 personality types in the MBTI theory: 
ISTJ / SiTe
ISFJ / SiFe
ISTYP / TiSe
ISFP / FiSe

INTJ / NiTe
INFJ / NiFe
INTP / TiNe
INFP / FiNe

ESTJ / TeSi
ESFJ / FeSi
ESTP / SeTi
ESFP / SeFi

ENTJ / TeNi
ENFJ / FeNi
ENTP / TiNe
ENFP / NeTi
~•~

📝 MBTI and cognitive functions test with more accurate results:
~•~

Monday, July 17, 2023

Tips: Some Advice On How To Deal With Siblings Or Half-Siblings Who Are Very Envious Of You

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 
📜 Question: Recently I overheard one of my half-sisters confessing to a close friend of hers about how she actually feels very jealous of me for several reasons. Now I've figured out that her aloofness and disrespectful acts are triggered by her despicable feelings of envy. What should I do to cope with envious siblings who can't suppress their intense jealousy regardless of my efforts to be fair and kind towards them?
📝 Answer: Allah the Almighty knows best. 
✅ 5 Dos regarding jealous siblings (whether full biological siblings, half-siblings or step-siblings):
1] Learn to develop and maintain patience for Allah's sake, in the same way that the Prophet Yusuf 'alaihis salaam was also patient and forgiving towards his half-brothers. 
2] Firmly believe that you're not the only person in this entire universe who sometimes struggles from sibling rivalry or occasional mistreatment from rivals guilty of intense jealousy. Consider the fact that having some enemies or haters is an indication of your success, with Allah's Will, and ownership of notable qualities which those insecure bullies lack.
3] Steadfastly say Du'a and ask Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala for more guidance regarding how to intelligently deal with envious people including siblings who are severely jealous of you.
4] Be humble and strong enough to advise and assist your siblings, despite their undeniable jealousy, when it comes to helping them for Allah's sake with only what is lawful. 
5] Indirectly inspire them to become better Muslims by consistently maintaining Taqwa, fearing just Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, and implementing beautiful character wherever you are.
❎ 5 Don'ts regarding jealous siblings (whether full biological siblings, half-siblings or step-siblings), as much as possible, avoid these:
1• Don't trust them fully and don't expect them to be wholeheartedly trustworthy. Never seek their advice because seeing you improve and succeed simply increases their inward misery.
2• Don't be surprised if they regularly ignore a lot of your messages, purposely delay answering your queries or exclude you from a number of gatherings frequently. Many foes and narcissists make lousy attempts to distress you to prevent you from achieving your goals. If they don't notice you thriving or doing better than them in life, while Tawfeeq only comes from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, they'd be less emotionally disturbed through envying you. 
3• Never tell them about your visions, dreams, plans and most personal thoughts in the same way that the Prophet Yusuf / Joseph 'alaihis salaam was also advised by his father Prophet Ya'qub / Jacob 'alaihis salaam to refrain from narrating his special dream to his half-brothers. Imagine envious people as puppets of nosy spies who are inwardly dissatisfied with themselves, and they're being dictated by those obnoxious pranksters to treat you badly to distract themselves from their inward miseries and insecurities. Stubbornly refuse to confide in anybody guilty of intense envy concerning anything because you can sense for sure they're mostly pretending while confirming they're truly untrustworthy.
4• Don't waste your energy, time and good deeds backbiting about them even if they likely gossip about you now and then. 
5• Don't bother being curious about what they post online since nothing positive and meaningful can be obtained from the actions and statements of jealous individuals.
📑 Note: Remind yourself that even though they're part of your family (as they're your siblings, half-siblings etc.) and you should do what you can to take good care of them for Allah's sake, it is for your own well-being to avoid being too close to them or influenced by them if they make it obvious they're still intensely envious of the tests and blessings which Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala chose to bestow upon you.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Do not envy one another, do not outbid each other, do not hate one another, do not turn away from each other, and do not outsell each other. Rather, be servants of Allah (The Almighty) as brothers. The Muslim is the brother of another Muslim. He does not wrong him, nor humiliate him, nor look down upon him. Righteousness is here," and he Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam pointed to his chest three times. The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "It is enough evil for a man to look down upon his Muslim brother. The entirety of the Muslim is sacred to another Muslim: his life, his wealth, and his (honor or image) reputation."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2564
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Faith (Imaan) and envy do not combine within a believing servant."
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Greed and faith (Imaan) are never combined in the heart of a (true Muslim) servant."
Source: Sunan Al-Nasā’ī 3109
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Beware of envy, for it erases good deeds just as fire devours wood or grass."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4903
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Suyuti 

Saturday, July 15, 2023

Tips: So What If They Didn't Invite Me? At Least I Don't Have To Put Up With Their Gossip And Meaningless Convos

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Question: As an introverted intuitive (INTJ-A), what's your usual reaction when you discover that some mutual acquaintances or family members are about to attend a gathering which you were not invited to?
📝 Answer: 1] If the host of the social event or gathering is a person whom I genuinely care about and like for Allah's sake, I'd ask one of the invitees, as well as the host directly, if it's okay for me to join them. If they make it clear that I can go, then 
Inn-sha-Allah I'd tag along, and if I can sense that they're uncomfortable with me going, then Alhamdulillah I'd gladly keep my distance, respecting their choice of not including me in their activities which Allah the Most Wise obviously didn't destine for me.
2] If the person hosting the event is a complete stranger or somebody whom I'm not interested in befriending, then I won't bother approaching the invitees with questions like "Why didn't you tell me about this?", "How come they didn't invite me?" Or "Do you think it would be a nice surprise for them if I accompany you?" etc. Instead of unnecessarily worrying about why I wasn't invited, I'd patiently accept the fact that: 
1•) Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala did not decree that I'd attend their gathering. Additionally it's an actual blessing that I am not part of such event if it involves fitna, ridiculous gossiping and silly attempts to make each other jealous to soothe subtle insecurities.
2•) The hosts and I aren't closely associated or familiar with one another, so it makes sense that I wouldn't be part of their list of guests to invite, particularly if we haven't spoken to each other in a long time or most of our conversations feel awfully artificial.
3•) All in all, their goals, temperament and interests most likely differ from mine. I would also refrain from inviting certain individuals to a project or group activity if their values oppose what I value.
3] Since I wasn't directly invited to their gathering, I would avoid stalking the social media posts and uploads of the hosts who didn't include me and similarly respect myself enough to stay away from browsing around any online content of those who attended the event without me. No benefit can be gained from acting like a snoop or nosy spy obnoxiously prying into issues which do not concern him at all. 
4] Imagine the disadvantages of attending their gathering including unwillingly pretending to listen to meaningless dialogues and putting up with the pointless bragging or fibbing of selfish narcissists. 
5] Acknowledge the truth that I'm not the only soul in this whole universe who has been purposely excluded or viewed as the "outcast" or "weirdo". Oftentimes it's one of Allah's tests that He surrounds you with inwardly sorrowful, insecure or narcissistic people whose envious grudge against you compels them to do whatever they can to demotivate you because your strong faith Imaan and connection with Allah the Most Loving, or your beautiful heart and lofty aspirations remind them of their dissatisfaction with themselves.
~•~
📖 Suhayb RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Amazing is the affair of the believer, as there is good for him in every matter. This is not the case for anyone but for the (true Muslim) believer. If he goes through ease (or happy moments), he thanks Allah (The Almighty) and it is good for him. If he goes through difficulty, he shows patience and it is good for him."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2999
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah (The Almighty), and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2664
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

Friday, July 14, 2023

Tips: Some Secrets To Not Feeling Guilty About Not Being Able To Attend Every Wedding

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful
📝 Some secrets to not feeling guilty at all about declining a wedding invitation: 
1. Remind yourself of the real reason/s why you decided in the first place that you couldn't attend the wedding. Some justifiable reasons for not attending a social event include: Insufficient budget for transportation to reach the wedding venue and overspending is something you avoid as much as possible, being preoccupied with several tasks or assignments to complete, receiving direct instruction from your husband to not go to a certain place particularly if the destination is too far, not feeling well physically and/or emotionally etc. 
2. Recall at least two instances when you had your own gathering or when you were present at an occasion and this person was not able to show up. If they're incapable of attending every gathering you go to, you too shouldn't feel guilty about not having the means to appear at every celebration they attend.
3. Be grateful Alhamdulillah that at least you have more time and opportunity to focus on other responsibilities.
4. Be contented knowing that
 Inn-sha-Allah the meals which the hosts may have reserved for you can be given to somebody else who probably requires them a lot more than you do. 
5. Remember that answering the calls to pray to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala (the five obligatory prayers) is much more important and more rewarding then having to say yes to every wedding invitation, especially if there's a possibility that a person's wedding includes music, folk dance performance or unnecessary mixing among males and females who are not mahrams etc.
6. Acknowledge the truth that the host has other acquaintances and relatives whom they also invited but some of them are unable to turn up due to understandable excuses for not attending. You're not the only one on earth who politely declined a wedding invitation - and even if you were, the host should be confident enough to forgive you for not attending. 
7. Look forward Inn-sha-Allah to meeting the hosts in the future and greeting them again, maintaining good manners, patience and contentment, for Allah's sake, as a striving Muslim.
~•~
📖 Suhayb RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Amazing is the affair of the believer, as there is good for him in every matter. This is not the case for anyone but for the (true Muslim) believer. If he goes through ease (or happy moments), he thanks Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) and it is good for him. If he goes through difficulty, he shows patience (for Allah's sake) and it is (also) good for him."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2999
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah (The Almighty) than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase 'if only' opens the way for the work of shaytan."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2664
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim