Tips: What Immaturity Is And What It's Not

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Immature adults generally act like children and most of the time lack good manners when dealing with others. 

🔹 You're not immature if you often enjoy spending time with kids, including your nieces and nephews, particularly when taking care of them. The term "immature" suitably describes adults who spend most of their lifetime plotting of ways to bully and get back at somebody who is a lot younger than them. 

🔹 You're not immature if oftentimes your bedroom, residence or office gets messy and unorganized, especially when you are too stressed or fatigued to maintain its tidiness. A person would be immature if they instantly judge everybody based on their outward appearance and environment they reside in without prior attempt to actually become acquainted with them. 

🔹 You're not immature if you sometimes smell like perspiration, specially if you've been walking around a lot, you have health issues, or you are still preoccupied with tasks that are tiring. Immature adults tend to make fun of others' flaws and imperfections as though they themselves are completely free from shortcomings. 

🔹 You are not immature if you occasionally giggle when you find an inoffensive joke or witty remark funny. You would be immature if you repeatedly laugh at other people whenever they slip, lose their balance, mispronounce a word, make mistakes or find themselves in awkward situations, instead of making effort to show empathy. 

🔹 You are far from being immature if you're uninterested in winning every single debate and arguing with those who are too arrogant to forgive, apologize or admit their wrongs. Immaturity is obvious when one is incapable of letting go of past slights and misunderstandings. 

🔹 Rightfully asserting your rights with their valid reasons does not make you immature. What does is when you always feel a sense of entitlement, insist that anytime you can grab what others have because you pridefully believe you deserve it somehow, and when you don't receive what you demanded, you overreact irrationally. 

🔹 Other negative qualities which are typical of immature adults include: Laughing boisterously when one should be taking something seriously, playing a game on one's phone or being deliberately inattentive when a lecturer is delivering a speech, and participating in childish gossip.

~•~

📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi 

📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise for one who leaves arguments even if he is right, and a house in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lies even when joking, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character excellent."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4800

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi 

📖 Abu Nu'aym reported: Fudayl Ibn 'Iyad, may Allah have mercy on him, said, “If you mix with people, mix with those who have good character; it only invites to good. Do not mix with those who have bad character, for it only invites to evil.”

Source: Ḥilyat Al-Awliyā’ 11728

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-what-it-means-to-actually-maintain.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/03/tips-seven-things-you-stop-doing-when.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-signs-of-immature-adults-what-it.html 

Note: Self-Respect vs Actual Narcissism

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Five differences between somebody with self-respect and a person who is an arrogant narcissist: 

🔹 When browsing around social media: 

❌ A lot of narcissists tend to stalk the accounts of people whom they envy to monitor their moves so they can utilize whatever info they've amassed to compete against other users and post updates to prove their superiority. Some narcissists though may decide to unfollow you if they notice that you seem more competent, productive or successful than them in multiple ways. They can't handle the unpleasant feeling of jealousy every time they see you thriving in areas where they're struggling.

✅ Individuals who respect themselves actively avoid stalking profiles of those whose status updates can't inspire them to become better humans. Their choice to unfriend certain users isn't done out of egotism but they genuinely don't want to waste precious time absorbing content which could be more toxic than advantageous. 

🔹 Why they decided to stop trying to be close friends with you: 

❌ An actual narcissist loses interest in wanting to connect with you once they realize that you're somebody who's not easily taken advantage of, can't be manipulated, or you refuse to spoil them with the kind of attention which they obnoxiously feel entitled to. 

✅ Those with self-respect would unapologetically distance themselves from you because they got tired of tolerating your awful addiction to gossiping, telling lots of lies and treating them unfairly. 

🔹When talking in a meeting or group: 

❌ Typical narcissists would usually refrain from sharing tips and contributing to the discussion because they generally don't enjoy helping others out, unless doing so comes with a special advantage, or they're afraid of making mistakes as they desire to be perceived as "flawless". 

✅ Someone who has a healthy amount of confidence and self-respect, not arrogance, would occasionally share ideas which they believe can be beneficial for the team. They don't fear rejection, won't force anybody to hold the same opinion as theirs, and they know when to be silent and when to walk away from pointless arguments. 

🔹When practicing kindness and accepting requests from you for support or assistance:  

❌ The narcissist's main motive for assisting you is to look reliable so they can use those moments when they were useful as tools against you in the future. "Remember that one time when I helped you with such-and-such and that other incident when I defended you? Now it's your turn to return my favors. So do ABC then XYZ without complaints etc." is something a narcissist may say to persuade you to comply with their demands. Other narcissists would arrogantly ignore you if no superficial benefit can be gained from being cooperative.

✅ Those who respect themselves would only do what you ask them to if they are capable of carrying out those tasks and if cooperating with you on a particular matter does not contradict their values. 

🔹When uploading photos on social media: 

❌ Actual narcissists, who are in reality awfully insecure on the inside, feel desperate to be admired and perceived as popular. Whenever possible they'd upload pictures of the expensive meals or beverages they've enjoyed, and new places they have traveled to, with the sole intention of flaunting their affluence or to provoke envy in those whom they're secretly envious of. 

✅ Muslims with self-respect and who strive to sincerely please Only Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala don't oblige themselves to constantly prove that their lifestyles are more enjoyable than others' lives. Since they're confident enough to not be overcome by negative feelings of jealousy, frequently taking selfies or broadcasting their material joys isn't included in their list of things to do to achieve happiness inwardly.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever loves for the sake of Allah, hates for the sake of Allah, gives for the sake of Allah, and withholds for the sake of Allah has perfected the faith (Imaan)."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4681

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "No one who has the weight of a seed of arrogance (atom's weight of kibr) in his heart will enter Paradise." A man said, “But a man likes to have nice clothes and nice shoes.” The Prophet SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah is Beautiful and He loves beauty. Arrogance is to disregard (or reject) the truth and to look down on the people."

Source: Sahih Muslim 91

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A man is upon the religion of his close friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2378

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Nawawi

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah’s noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is not stung twice from the same hole."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5782, Sahih Muslim 2998

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-what-real-arrogance-is-and-what-it.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-nine-signs-of-actual-narcissists.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/12/tips-seven-things-which-narcissists.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/01/tips-difference-between-self-respect.html  

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/poem-insecure-often-misunderstand.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-five-tips-to-befriend-yourself-and.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-you-can-forgive-and-move-on.html 

Poem: Do Not Let Social Media Make You Feel Insecure

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Don't let social media make you feel so insecure. 

Don't allow some users' posts to make you feel unsure 

About the countless gifts which Allah chose to give you. 

While browsing around various profiles, never assume 

That some people's gains imply your value has reduced. 

~•~

Some people's need to showcase their wins, joys and virtues 

Online shouldn't be an invite for you to feel blue. 

View some of them as children flaunting their scribbles to 

Impress the grown-ups, while the others aren't secure 

With who they are, thus they're compelled to show off and prove. 

~•~

Those who don't always get to enjoy expensive food 

Often upload photos of drinks and meals they've consumed. 

Confident diners, who aren't one bit insecure, 

Don't feel obliged to photograph what they sip and chew. 

It's fine though to post pics to promote halal menus. 

~•~

Those who love taking pictures of themselves and in groups 

Should have some Islamic lessons properly reviewed. 

Obsession with selfies could show one feels insecure, 

Desperate to be told they're pretty, to feel valued, 

When good looks are less important than good deeds to do. 

~•~

So that social media doesn't make you insecure, 

Be careful with the info and content you consume. 

Unfollow users with narcissistic attitudes 

Whose posts can't inspire but cause you to feel insecure. 

And stay connected to Allah, with deep gratitude.

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/poem-as-muslim-dont-be-rude-and-insecure.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/07/note-confident-people-vs-insecure.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-three-negative-traits-common-among.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/01/poem-what-insecure-people-do-and-tips.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-five-insecure-habits-that.html 

Poem: I'm Not A People-Pleaser. I Don't Care If Some People Dislike Me.

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 To secret haters, bashers and public enemies, 

And to critics or stalkers who stalk resentfully: 

Despise all you like, from any chat group you may leave, 

Scowl or sadly roll your eyes each time you hear me speak - 

Your grudges won't urge me to borrow your misery. 

~•~

Allah the Almighty didn't design me to keep 

Your ego pleased, ensure we're always in harmony, 

And act as though we're friends despite your toxicity. 

On Judgment Day, Allah shall ask questions, certainly, 

And none of those queries will concern you liking me.

~•~

I don't care if you like me, as long as I believe 

That I do what I must, so Allah is Pleased with me. 

Perceive me as "immature", "unfeeling", "weird" or "mean", 

While I just see them as words from a dictionary 

Uttered by some clown who's confused with low self-esteem.

~•~ 

I'm not a bully. Allah knows who I am really. 

The way I'm perceived by opponents unpleasantly 

Can't negatively impact my values and beliefs. 

Fruit-bearing trees can still carry seeds although dead leaves 

Stand nearby. Insults won't stop the grit of the sincere.

~•~ 

On the Day when Allah's Justice prevails finally, 

Different questions may be asked, and most probably 

None of them would involve why we couldn't be besties. 

Why should I bother worrying if some dislike me, 

When being a people-pleaser isn't a good deed?

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever wrongs his brother (another Muslim) regarding his honor or anything else should resolve the matter today before it cannot be resolved with gold and silver coins. If he has good deeds to his credit, they will be taken from him according to the measure of his injustice. If he has no good deeds left, he will bear the evil deeds of the one he has oppressed."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 2317

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Bukhari

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: 'Allah has decreed what He wills.' Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/03/tips-nine-likely-reasons-why-some.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-be-strong-enough-to-not-be.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/note-how-most-intj-personality-types.html  

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/03/poem-three-tips-on-how-not-to-be-overly.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/09/note-five-reasons-why-we-cant-vibe-well.html  

Note: Reminders Regarding Fasting Six Days Of Shawwaal

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Quick notes regarding fasting the six days of Shawwaal: 

1] It is allowed to start fasting the Sunnah fasts of six days in Shawwaal on the day right after Eid Al-Fitr as long as one has completed fasting the obligatory fasts of the whole of Ramadan. 

2] When it comes to Sunnah fasting, one does not require to specify their niyyah / intention to fast prior to fasting for Allah's sake. So if a Muslim wakes up after sunrise without Suhoor, they may intend to fast the Sunnah fasting of six days of Shawwaal from the moment they decide to fast on that day, as long as they didn't eat or drink anything beforehand. 

3] Since it is only a Sunnah (not obligatory), a Muslim who is fasting the Sunnah fasts of Shawwaal can break their voluntary fast and fast again on another day if somebody invites them for a gathering. 

Allah the Almighty knows best. 

📖 Abu Ayyub RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever fasts the month of Ramadan and then follows it with six days of fasting in the month of Shawwal, it will be as if he fasted for the entire year."

Source: Sahih Muslim 1164

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://abukhadeejah.com/fasting-the-six-days-of-shawwal-before-making-qada-of-the-days-missed-in-ramadan-ibn-baz/