بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين

بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين
May Allah the Almighty grant us more beneficial knowledge, accept our good deeds, forgive our mistakes, protect us from fitna, and join us with the righteous believers in Jannatul Ferdaus. Ameen.

Sunday, July 9, 2023

Tips: When Some Things In This Dunya Don't Go As Planned

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

🗒️ Question: As a Muslimah whose MBTI personality type is INTJ-A, usually how do you behave when some things don't go as planned?
📝 Answer: Three examples of situations when I intended to do something or wanted to complete a particular task but, with Allah's Will, I wasn't able to carry it out: 
1] When I looked forward to arriving at a graduation venue with a motorized tricycle before at least 7:30 AM so I could briefly converse with some of the students and mothers who arrived earlier, but we reached the place at around 8 AM since the driver who previously agreed to grant transportation wasn't fully certain about where he was going.
2] When I was willing to meet and interview the mother of the groom, during the wedding of one of my maternal nieces, and have lengthy discussions with a number of my relatives whom I haven't seen in a long time, but several setbacks prevented us from observing the entire event. Since I couldn't properly attend the occasion, I didn't bother browsing around online for a single content or status update connected to the ceremony. Respect yourself enough to not give your attention to anybody who could be a cowardly narcissist acting like an overgrown bully desperate to disappoint you to appease their emotional insecurities or alleviate their envy of you.
3] When I was really eager to sit beside or close to my dear husband in a vehicle before he traveled to Saudi Arabia recently, very much anticipating sitting near him to listen to him speak that I even asked Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala to decree that there'd be sufficient space for me but there wasn't any so I followed my husband to the airport with one of his nieces driving another car. 

✅ What you can do when some things don't work out as you had hoped for: 
1] Adamantly believe that Allah the Almighty is the Only One Who has absolute control of all His creation and servants. Nothing ever occurs in the whole universe unless Allah the Most Wise allows its occurrence.
2] Even before you were created and formed as an embryo, understand that Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala already predestined and decreed your set of probable actions to choose from as well as their outcomes. Patiently accept the consequences of your intentional actions, learn from your mistakes and have Sabr with Allah's Qadr as a Muslim.
3] Try to gain wisdom from every incident, see what lessons you can derive from each disappointment, or look forward
Inn-sha-Allah to earning rewards for striving to maintain patience. 
4] Imagine the potential problems or avoidable pitfalls you could have encountered if you actually did what you planned to do. Sometimes Allah the All-Knowing may prevent certain things from happening, such as establishing a connection with some strangers, because He Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala knows they're just bad news for you - their mere existence can't benefit you at all in this world and the afterlife.
5] Remember that even the most noble of all human beings namely the beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam went through various trials, challenges and predicament including that instance when he and many pilgrims were ordered to abruptly cancel or postpone their pilgrimage during the treaty of Hudaybiyyah. From the lessons achievable in this aspect is to not feel surprised when those who lack faith Imaan and Taqwa suddenly show you their incompetence or unreliability.
~•~
📖 Ibn Abbas RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah (The Almighty) has recorded good and evil deeds and He (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) made them clear. Whoever intends to perform a good deed but does not do it, Allah will record it as a complete good deed. If he intends to do it (the good deed) and does so, Allah the Almighty will record it as ten good deeds, up to seven hundred times as much or even more. If he intends to do an evil deed and does not do it, Allah will record for him one complete good deed. If he does it, Allah will record for him as one evil deed."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6126 
Sahih Muslim 131
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
📖 Suhayb RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Amazing is the affair of the believer, as there is good for him in every matter. This is not the case for anyone but for the believer. If he goes through ease (or happy moments), he thanks Allah and it is good for him. If he goes through difficulty, he shows patience and it is good for him."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2999
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah (the Almighty), and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."
Source: Sahih Muslim 2664
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 
https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-dealing-with-letdowns-and.html 
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Saturday, July 8, 2023

Tips: If Your Husband Resumes Smoking Here's What You Can Do

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Question: What advice can you give to a Muslimah whose husband promised to her that he'll never smoke again if he can afford to buy a new car or if one of his older relatives agrees, with Allah's Will, to finance his Hajj/pilgrimage, and then after some time her husband resumed smoking?
📝 Answer: I'd advise her to:
1] Still forgive her husband sincerely for Allah's sake, remembering the undeniable fact that he's precisely similar to her in being a human who's prone to committing errors now and then. 
2] Divert her attention away from the "broken promise" and instead recall all of the wonderful things which her husband lovingly did in the past, appreciating his notable qualities while patiently hoping for his gradual development and improvement as a Muslim, aware that humans weren't born to be absolutely infallible. 
3] Remember the main and actual purpose (her true niyyah/intention) of her willingly accepting her husband's marriage proposal from the beginning. The more frequently you remind yourself about your goals or the real reasons for doing something, the less likely you'd want to quit such task or undertaking, particularly if your deed is intended to please Only Allah the Almighty.
4] Allow your husband to admire your capability of being wholeheartedly forgiving and lenient towards him for Allah's sake. 
Inn-sha-Allah your other half / soulmate may eventually quit his addiction. Having the inner strength to show forgiveness is an essential quality of very close friends.
5] Alhamdulillah stay contented and be glad that your husband isn't guilty of an offense which is far more serious. 

Allah the Most Wise knows best. 
A sin which is committed several times but it leads to lots of Istighfaar and Tawbah is better than a wrongdoing which is forsaken not for Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala but out of fearing one's wife. The ideal Muslim zawja (wife) should let her husband transform at his own pace, knowing that many transformations actually require some time.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1159
Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi
Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."
Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātih 5/2125
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife."
Source: Sahih Muslim 1467
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Qatadah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, you will never leave anything for the sake of Allah the Almighty but that Allah will replace it with something better."
Source: Musnad Ahmed 22565
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
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Thursday, July 6, 2023

Note: Don't Accept A Guy's Marriage Proposal If He Does Any Of These 9 Things

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 
🗒️ If a guy knowingly does at least two of these things, then it may be wiser for a Muslimah to reject his marriage proposal: 
1] If it is obvious that he does not take his Salah seriously, and he frequently lacks the courage to take initiative to pray inside the Masjid, or if it is one of his bad habits to deliberately delay praying the obligatory prayers. 
2] If it is clear that he has zero interest in learning more about Islam and he doesn't bother attending any Islamic lecture eagerly. 
3] If he has publicly made fun of any Muslimah for her decision to wear the niqab or if he has previously joked about Muslim men who choose to keep their beards long.
4] If he is already married, with or without children, while he is currently jobless and obviously struggling financially. Your level of faith (Imaan) and patience (Sabr) should be extremely high if you're willing to stay married to this kind of man.
5] If he insists that you both "run away to a different city or village" and he wants an "elopement wedding" - that you marry him in secrecy, without the presence of your mother and/or father as well as other relatives. 
6] If he confirms that many of his belongings are bought on credit while he owes several individuals a large amount of money, and this indebted guy wishes to give your mahr dowry later at an unspecified date 
Inn-sha-Allah in the future. 
7] If it is known that he had multiple divorces while his ex-wives complain about how he is generally unkind, unfair and consistently unavailable (physically and emotionally).
8] If he is intentionally disrespectful towards his mother and any of his sisters or other female relatives. 
9] If there is established evidence of him struggling from being addicted to drugs or intoxicants, and he takes pride in his addiction (online and offline).
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If someone (a true Muslim) proposes marriage to you whose religion and character satisfies you, then you should accept it. If you do not do so, there will be trials on the earth and the spread of corruption."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1084
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated: I said, “O Messenger of Allah, should women be asked for their consent (permission) before marriage?” The noble Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Yes." I said, “Indeed, sometimes a virgin is too shy to speak when asked.” The beloved Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Her silence (not resisting nor complaining) is her consent (evidence that she is okay with the marriage proposal)."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 6547
Sahih Muslim 1420
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
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Tuesday, July 4, 2023

Note: Seven Signs You Are Not Materialistic

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 
🗒️ Seven signs that you're not materialistic at all while your minimalist lifestyle is a blessing/virtue: 
1] As your parents' child, or as your husband's grateful wife, and as a friend or guest, you are "easy to please". You're not self-entitled nor obnoxiously demanding. Expecting people to constantly shower you with gifts and freebies is foreign to you.
2] You're absolutely incapable of feeling jealous whenever you notice others enjoying supposedly glam and luxurious lifestyles. In fact, you probably feel sorry that many of those whom Allah the Almighty destined to become affluent are too insecure, inwardly unhappy or selfish to not bother giving a portion of their wealth to the needy and destitute. 
3] You try your best for Allah's sake to avoid excessive consumerism and overspending. 
4] You have no guilt whatsoever in reusing items which are reusable and wearing the same outfit you wore in the past or recently. 
5] You're a nonchalant expert at never comparing your current situation and journeys to others' circumstances and unique life stories. You'd rather focus on thanking Allah the Most Kind for all the favors which He Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala chose to bestow upon you than worrying about what this person and that stranger are doing with the income which Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala gave them as an obvious test.
6] You always make sure that you don't have a single debt. 
7] You're not offended, not one bit, when some relatives, strangers or acquaintances describe you as "boring", "cheap", "old-fashioned", "poor" or "unfashionable", aware that whatever lame remark they hurl at you could be a reflection of their insecurities or undeniable dissatisfaction with themselves - in actuality they lack the ability to be as confident and contented as you are.
~•~
📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "There is no envy but in two cases: A man whom Allah (The Almighty) has given wealth and he spends it rightly in Allah's Way, and a man whom Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) has given wisdom and he acts upon it and teaches with it."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 73, Sahih Muslim 816
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The poor Muslims will enter (Jannah) Paradise before the rich (ahead of the wealthy believers) by half of a day, the length of which is five hundred years."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2354
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "O Abu Dharr, do you say an abundance of possessions is wealth?" I said 'yes.' The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Do you say a lack of possessions is poverty?" I said 'yes.' The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam repeated this three times, then he said, "Wealth is in the heart and poverty is in the heart. Whoever is wealthy in his heart will not be harmed no matter what happens in the world. Whoever is impoverished in his heart will not be satisfied no matter how much he has in the world. Verily, he will only be harmed by the greed of his own soul."
Source: Al-Mu’jam Al-Kabīr 1618
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
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Note: Seven Things Which Disappoint A Lot Of Narcissists

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📝 Narcissists are like deluded spies who desperately wish to see your wrong reactions every time they flaunt their ugly lack of morals and take pride in their immature actions. Seven things which narcissists despise and regard as disappointing: 
1] When you withhold from them sycophantic compliments while intentionally avoiding paying attention to whatever they want you to notice just to trigger you to feel "jealous" (their new look, pointless YouTube channels, and pretentious selfies which they frequently upload on social media etc.). 
2] When you don't bother asking them personal questions about themselves in which they're granted bragging opportunities (such as "well, how did your trip go? Which hotels did you and your family stay at? Who did you network with? What's the story behind your name 'Yafayka Liyra'?" etc.)
3] When they know that you haven't asked about them after they've been away or absent from work or school for a significantly long period of time, particularly if you can sense they'll probably just invent another lie.
4] When they're "playing hard to get" or acting arrogantly aloof online and offline while you're actually uninterested in building any connection with them. 
5] When you don't care enough to ask them "so how come you left the group chat?" after they fled from an online conversation, since with or without them there really isn't considerable difference.
6] When you faithfully continue loving the special souls for Allah's sake, including your parents and husband, whom they eagerly wanted you to quarrel with and abandon. 
7] When you make it very clear that you're not envious of their tests and blessings at all. One evidence of you not harboring envy is your admirable maintenance of integrity and good manners even around toxic individuals like them.
~•~
📖 Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "No one who has the weight of a seed (or atom) of arrogance (kibr) in his heart will enter (Jannah) Paradise." Someone said, "But a man loves to have beautiful clothes and shoes." The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, Allah (The Almighty) is Beautiful and He (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) loves beauty. Arrogance means rejecting the truth and looking down on the people."
In another narration, the Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "No one who has the weight of a seed of faith (Imaan) in his heart will enter Hellfire."
Source: Sahih Muslim 91
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

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