Poem: How Can You Tell That You Married A Good Man?

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

💌 If you were to ask me, "Exactly how would you know 

That Allah the Most Kind and Wise has indeed bestowed 

Upon you the best soulmate? Really, how do you know 

That your husband's a good man who doesn't throw sorrow 

At you, so you can stay loyal wherever he goes?" 

~•~

I'd say, contentedly, without pretense and remorse, 

"Alhamdulillah. I thank Allah that He bestowed 

Upon me a loving spouse. With certainty I know 

There are reasons why Allah connected us two souls. 

In many cases Allah's Wisdom isn't yet shown. 

~•~

I believe and I know, without deluding my soul, 

That my husband's a good man because through him I've grown 

In countless ways, with Allah's Will, I've learned to be strong, 

More patient and understanding when my husband's work 

Keeps him busy, and despite that I don't feel forlorn. 

~•~

I believe he's a good man as I've seen that he goes 

To the Masjid whenever he can, and he has shown 

Me how charming he is with children who often go 

To him to enjoy his fun stories and cheerful jokes.

Overall my husband's vibes bring forth warmth and comfort.

~•~

Although my spouse and I don't meet up daily, I know 

That our marriage is blessed, since my faith/Imaan stays strong. 

My husband's presence inspires Shukr, and when he goes 

Out, I greet Sabr, not forgetting my man's efforts, 

And loving him for Allah's sake outweighs any gold."

~•~ 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1159

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Tirmidhi

Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."

Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātīḥ 5/2125 

📖 Ibn 'Abbas RadhiAllahu 'anhuma narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "I was shown the Hellfire and (found) that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful." It was asked, "Do they disbelieve in Allah?" (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam replied, "They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, 'I have never received any good from you."

Sahih Al-Bukhari 29

In-book reference: Book 2, Hadith 22

USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 1, Book 2, Hadith 29 

📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations. One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'"

Source: Sahih Muslim 2813

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/poem-five-signs-that-your-husband-does.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/12/poem-demerits-of-divorce.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/06/note-on-being-husbands-loyal-wife.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/10/poem-as-your-husbands-loyal-wife-avoid.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-dismiss-shaytans-whispers-as-he.html 

Tips: Some Advice On Ignoring Toxic Individuals

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

🗒️ Some tips to ignore toxic individuals at work or school for Allah's sake, as they mutter nonsensical insults whenever you pass by them despite previously advising them to quit acting obnoxious or you're avoiding unnecessary conversations with them because they are notorious for gossiping: 

1] Put your headphones on when you know you'll be walking past them while listening to Qur'an recitations, Islamic lectures or inspirational talks set to loud volume, and stubbornly withhold from giving them eye contact as much as possible. 

2] If you don't have earphones, simply continue listening to some Qur'an recitations, Islamic lectures or inspirational talks on your cellphone / android tablet set to very high volume (to mute the toxic individuals), and steadfastly avoid making eye contact with them as much as possible.  

3] Try to make your walking pace or gait as quick as possible whenever you must walk past individuals who are too toxic to talk to. By behaving as though you're in a hurry and too busy to give them any attention, while minimizing your glances at them, you are signalling the fact you have no interest whatsoever in befriending those who are toxic and unreliable. 

4] No matter what they do to seek your attention, such as purposely disregarding you while being brashly chatty around others, gladly stay away from interacting with them as much as possible. Frequently recall those instances when they acted obnoxiously and proved to you they're not trustworthy at all. 

5] Understand that forgiving people from within doesn't always necessitate reconciliation if reconciling with someone whom you can't trust only brings about trouble in both worlds. Forgive them for Allah's sake as you confidently move on, distancing yourself (to protect your faith/Imaan and overall well-being) from their unreliability, despicable lack of manners, and awful tendency to tell lies countless times.

~•~

📖 Abu Umamah RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever loves for the sake of Allah, hates for the sake of Allah, gives for the sake of Allah, and withholds for the sake of Allah has perfected the faith (Imaan)."

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4681

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Ali ibn Husayn RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, part of perfection in Islam is for a person to leave what does not concern him."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2318

Grade: Sahih li ghayri (Authentic) according to Al-Albani

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/tips-five-types-of-people-we-can-avoid.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2022/06/tips-when-to-ignore-insults-to-be.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/poem-three-instances-when-its-wiser-to.html 

Tips: Questions You May Ask Yourself To Check If You're People-pleasing Or Being Sincerely Kind And Helpful

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 Seven questions you may ask yourself to determine if you are being genuinely kind and helpful or you're being a people-pleaser: 

1] The act of kindness you're about to do - are you going to do it to serve Allah the Almighty, not to impress His servants nor to be known as a generous person? 

2] Is that act of kindness something which you also give yourself and your loved ones often, not exclusively to specific individuals? 

3] By doing that act of kindness, are you certain that you only seek rewards and more love from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala, instead of actually wanting the approval or attention of specific individuals? 

4] Is that something you really want to do, from your heart, and you know you're doing it for Allah's sake, free from reluctance and compulsion? 

5] Once you carry out that act of kindness sincerely for Allah's sake, can you guarantee you won't feel bothered or offended if the person whom you were kind to doesn't thank you directly, because you're truthfully making effort to please just Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala instead of His servants? 

6] Are you absolutely sure that this act of kindness doesn't oppose what Allah and His noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam approve of and it won't contradict your values? 

7] Can you reassure yourself that this act of kindness isn't done because you're worried about being perceived as "selfish" or "unhelpful", but rather you're trying to be kind since Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala loves those believers who strive to do charity/sadaqah for His sake whenever possible? 

If you answered "yes" to the above questions, then 

Inn-sha-Allah you're not guilty of people-pleasing. 

May Allah the Most Forgiving forgive all our mistakes and wrong intentions. Ameen. 

~•~

📖 Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever seeks the pleasure of Allah by the displeasure of the people, Allah will suffice him against the people. Whoever seeks the pleasure of the people by the displeasure of Allah, Allah will leave him to the patronage of the people."

Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2414

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: "Allah has decreed what He wills." Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan." 

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664 

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/poem-why-we-should-please-allah-only.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/04/note-steadfastness-in-pleasing-allah.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/02/note-importance-of-doing-good-deeds.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/08/tips-three-types-of-grudges-and-how-to.html 

https://abukhadeejah.com/ikhlas-its-meaning-how-to-achieve-it-and-the-whisperings-of-shaytan/ 

Note: Some Notes About Depression

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Depression may exist in those who lack energy, enthusiasm and motivation to get out of bed, preferring sleeping instead of dealing with the outside world. So a lot of them tend to cancel plans, take breaks from work, procrastinate, avoid socializing or stay isolated for long periods. It can also be present in those who try to keep themselves busy with many activities, intending to remain distracted with what makes them forget about their worries, problems and heavy responsibilities. Depression can be found in both people who don't have a lot of friends to count on and in celebrities who are surrounded by thousands of fans worldwide yet they feel empty inside as though there's something else that's missing.

Anyone from any social class in society, whether wealthy or financially struggling, can experience depression if they don't believe in Allah's Existence. Without knowing the main purpose of our creation, when things go wrong or we're dissatisfied with life from constant comparison, we may wrongfully start thinking there's no point in living. Inner joy, peace and contentment are all possible when we realize the reality of why Allah the Almighty created us, which is to live our lives to worship Only Allah until we see Him Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala in Jannah for our faith/Imaan and sincere striving with patience.

Don't be depressed because of lacking trustworthy companions; you have Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala Who always listens and understands exactly how you're feeling.

Don't be saddened if the job you currently have doesn't allow you to get as rich as you wanted to be; what matters is you continue trying your best to serve Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala patiently and care for your loved ones with halal income that also enables you to do charity when necessary.

Don't aim to collect money for a luxurious mansion in this temporary platform of examinations; this dunya is fleeting and your destination should be Jannatul Ferdaus where happiness and perfection are everlasting.

Whenever negative feelings of regret, anxiety and sorrow visit you, recall they're meant to expiate your sins as purification, remind you that you're human, and focus on attaining Allah's Love with more Dhikr, Du'as, prayers, acceptance of Allah's Qadr and good deeds like frequent Qur'an recitation. Furthermore, the more you dislike this world for whatever reason, see it as an encouragement to persistently strive to please Allah the Most Merciful until you're deserving of Jannah's entrance.

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Nothing afflicts a Muslim of hardship, nor illness, nor anxiety, nor sorrow, nor harm, nor distress, nor even the pricking of a thorn, but that Allah will expiate his sins by it."

Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 5318, Sahih Muslim 2573

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim 

📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The most privileged people in the world among the people of the Hellfire will come on the Day of Resurrection to be dipped in the Hellfire, then it will be said: 'O son of Adam, did you see any good? Did you get any blessing?' He will say: 'No, by Allah, my Lord!' Then the most miserable people in the world among the people of Paradise will come on the Day of Resurrection to be dipped in Paradise, then it will be said: 'O son of Adam, did you see any hardship? Did you have any distress?' He will say: 'No, by Allah, my Lord! I did not once see hardship or distress.'"

Source: Sahih Muslim 2807

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

📖 Aisha RadhiAllahu 'anha narrated that Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If the sins of a servant are numerous and he does not have good deeds to compensate, Allah will afflict him with sadness as an expiation for him."

Source: Musnad Ahmed 24708

Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to Al-Suyuti

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/09/tips-nine-things-to-avoid-for-allahs.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/06/poem-different-faces-of-depression.html

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/05/poem-some-things-you-can-do-to-manage.html

Note: Random Facts About Oneself Survey (A to Z get-to-know-you questions)

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 A-Z get-to-know-you questions, random survey, some facts about oneself: 

1] Adjective which accurately describes you: Loyal.

2] Breakfast you usually have: Bread and coffee. Alhamdulillah.  

3] Countries / cities you've been to: Alhamdulillah some of the places I've traveled to include 

Saudi Arabia, Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur, Langkawi, Pahang, Putrajaya), Singapore, Indonesia, Hong Kong, Thailand, France (Paris), England (London), Denmark (Copenhagen, Aalborg), Egypt (Cairo, Giza), USA (Washington DC, New York, Los Angeles California, Orlando Florida, Mississippi), UAE (Dubai, Abu Dhabi), at the airports only - Bangladesh, Bahrain, Qatar, Oman, Greece etc.

4] Dream you still recall: Seeing several Muslimahs in a large hall praying in different groups then walking away from the divided groupings and approaching an unidentified Muslimah wearing niqab and clad in all black who offered me a cup of tea or some warm beverage.

5] Error you've made in the past and you avoid it as much as possible: Making instant judgment about some people without being actually acquainted with them yet. AstaghfurAllah Al-'Atheem. 

6] Five qualities you want or admire in an ideal friend: 

Trustworthy, truthful, confident (not insecure nor prone to jealousy), ambitious (with notable goals) and supportive.

7] Gardening - do you enjoy it? I'm interested in it but haven't actually tried it yet. 

8] Helpful tip or advice from your dear parents: 

From my dear mother (Allah yarhamha. Ameen.) - Be kind and generous whenever you can. Don't stop fasting the Sunnah fasts. 

From my dear father (Allah yarhamhu. Ameen.) - Be humble. Don't meddle in affairs which do not concern you.

9] Inspirational quote or Hadith you'd like to share: 

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whoever travels a path in search of (beneficial and authentic) knowledge, Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) will make easy for him a path to Paradise."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2699

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

10] Joking or being playful with others - how often is it done?

Generally I'm serious and somewhat quiet around those whom I'm not close to. The more familiar I am with somebody, the more comfortable I am with showing my sense of humor now and then. 

11] Kindness - define it, in your own words. 

Kindness doesn't always signify giving out gifts and freebies to those whom one cares about, but to be kind is to maintain good manners and prevent oneself from treating people unjustly.

12] Love - explain it, from your perspective. 

When you truly love a Muslim for Allah's sake, including your spouse, you want them to succeed, thrive and be happy in both worlds, so patiently you help one another do the deeds which lead you to Jannatul Ferdaus with Allah's Mercy. 

13] Married - are you? If so, in what year did you marry? 

Alhamdulillah, yes I'm married. After rejecting several marriage proposals back in Saudi Arabia, my husband and I married in the year 2006. I was 20 while my husband was 28.

14] Nine turn-offs, awful attributes which cause you to be uninterested in wanting to befriend someone: 

1~ Numerous times they've proven to be dishonest and unreliable. 

2~ They are selfish and greedy opportunists.

3~ In general they behave like typical narcissists with overinflated ego.

4~ They are lazy, passive and unclear or not direct when communicating.

5~ They've made it evident that they're not very eager to learn more about Islam, attend Islamic classes or listen to beneficial lectures. 

6~ They are unconfident and seem to care too much about how society perceives them.

7~ Occasionally they partake in gossip and readily believe in rumors.

8~ You can sense that they're jealous of you by their frequent eye-rolls, disrespectful conduct, and unreliability.

9~ A lot of times they mistrust you and suspect your motives.

15] Opinion you have which a lot of individuals disagree with: 

I believe that if a Muslim husband is financially, emotionally and responsibly capable, he has the right to be married to up to four wives regardless of their tribe and nationality. 

16] Personality MBTI and/or enneagram type: 

INTJ 1w9 Alhamdulillah.

17] Question you frequently ask others: 

"How are you?", "Are you sure?" and "Why?"

18] Rainy or sunny weather, which do you prefer? Rainy weather. Alhamdulillah, there are more blessings especially when you say Du'a during rainfall. 

19] Subjects you disliked in school: Math and chemistry. 

20] Teacher's name whom you still remember: 

Abla Salwa at Al-Yamama National School in Riyadh city. She was one of the kindest teachers I've met. 

21] Unappealing quality or bad habit common among some individuals but which you refrain from: 

The urge to gossip or spread a Muslim's secrets. 

22] Vegetables you enjoy eating: Pumpkin, cucumbers, potatoes.

23] Weird fact about you: 

Alhamdulillah it's easy for me to emotionally detach from certain individuals. 

24] Ex-friends - do you have any? If so, what did you learn from disconnecting? 

Alhamdulillah yes. I've learned that Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala is the Only One Whom we can fully trust, and that a friendship can't last long if one of the individuals is envious.

25] Year 2020 - what have you learned from it? 

To maintain strong connection with Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala while being carefully selective about the content you absorb online and offline.

26] Zoom application - when was the last time you used it? 

Maybe some time ago. 

~•~

📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The strong believer is more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not be frustrated. If something befalls you, then do not say: 'If only I had done something else.' Rather say: 'Allah has decreed what He wills.' Verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shaytan."

Source: Sahih Muslim 2664

Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2021/11/note-marriage-life-survey.html 

https://mjustsharingislam.blogspot.com/2020/10/note-survey-on-love-and-marriage.html 

http://justsharingislam.blogspot.com/