بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين

بسم الله. ربي زدني علما. امين
May Allah the Almighty grant us more beneficial knowledge, accept our good deeds, forgive our mistakes, protect us from fitna, and join us with the righteous believers in Jannatul Ferdaus. Ameen.

Thursday, September 7, 2023

Poem: If Divorce Was A Door I'd Never Want It Opened

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

💌 Divorce is despicable, simply adds more problems, 
Stirs up drama in most cases in my opinion, 
And shows that those who gave up weren't truly trying
Their best to save the union since what's more important
Is foul pride which exceeds their drive to find solutions.
~•~
Divorce is like doors designed with fake advertisements 
Directing to false bargains which I don't want opened, 
Even if those who access them are wealthy women 
Who regard divorce as "courage" and "independence" - 
It's a trap, in my opinion, increasing problems.
~•~
Divorce is like a bridge that leads to dismal islands. 
Those who cross it often greet grief instead of "freedom",
And thoughts like "I shouldn't have left" may sometimes tease them, 
If the former lovers had a child or some children, 
Or the woman's ex was well-received by her parents.
~•~
Divorce is like a neon sign, I can imagine, 
Flickering at night and catching drivers' attention, 
Causing more destruction and remorse than enjoyment. 
Even if large crowds bought its message, I'd stay stubborn
And resilient for Allah's sake with my dear husband.
~•~
Even if divorce disguised itself as a close friend 
Pleading, "if you choose me, I guarantee contentment", 
I'd likely ditch it with "you're lawful but revolting.".
Most divorcees actually lacked strong faith and patience, 
And more than sincere love their ego was important.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e. her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious (righteous Muslimah) woman (otherwise) you will be a loser." 
Sahih Al-Bukhari 5090
In-book reference: Book 67 Hadith 28
USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 7, Book 62, Hadith 27 
📖 Thawban RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Whenever a woman asks her husband for a divorce without a strong reason, the fragrance of Paradise (Jannah) becomes forbidden for her."
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 2226
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut 
📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations (mischief, trouble). One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'" 
Source: Sahih Muslim 2813 
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
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Tuesday, September 5, 2023

Note: If Both Guys Wish To Remarry, Whose Remarriage Proposal Can She Accept?

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 
🗒️ Question: I've been through two divorces then after some time my ex-husbands approached a number of my biological brothers asking for a remarriage. While I agree that both of them have a lot of merits and handsome qualities, I'm confused regarding whose second marriage proposal I should accept. What questions can I ask myself to determine which guy deserves another chance to be with me? 
📝 Answer: Firstly, purify your niyyah/intention concerning your willingness to reconcile with one of them for Allah's sake then ask yourself these questions after you've prayed two Sunnah Rak'ahs of Salat Al-Istikhaara and supplicate to Allah the Most Wise asking Him Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala to guide you to making the best decision:
1. Which of the two Muslim men do you believe is a lot more like a special gift and blessing from Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala than a test? 
2. Which of them is more effective at directly and indirectly inspiring you to become a better Muslimah in many ways? 
3. Which of them is more loved and accepted by both of your parents? 
4. Which of them can you sense is more eager to sincerely learn about Islam and teach you whatever they have learned whenever they can?
5. Which of them are you more comfortable around and contented being seen with whether outdoors or indoors, and among relatives and strangers etc. 
6. Which of them is better at giving useful advice and you've witnessed their loving gestures a lot of times? 
7. Which of them evidently shows more concern about the well-being of their faith Imaan and yours? Who from them is a lot more enthusiastic about passing Allah's tests and wanting to succeed with you in the next life than showcasing undue attachment to dunya? 
8. Which of them is easier to forgive and love authentically for Allah's sake? 
9. Which of them is currently working in a profession or field that can 
Inn-sha-Allah bring them and you closer to pleasing Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala (e.g. being employed in a clinic, earning halal income as an ustadh or teacher at an Islamic school etc.)? 
10. Which of them has more loved ones and relatives who clearly support his request to remarry? 
11. Which of them is obviously less demanding, toxic and overbearing? Who from them is more caring, patient and understanding of you? 
12. Which of them brings you more tranquility and true contentment from within? 
13. Which of them has more female relatives such as sisters and female cousins whom you think you can trust and/or talk to easily?

The guy whose name appears more frequently than the other can be the one whom you remarry for Allah's sake, particularly if thinking about reconciling with your ex doesn't come with an ounce of guilt, hesitance, doubt, shame and remorse.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If I were to order anyone to prostrate to another, I would have ordered a wife to prostrate before her husband."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhī 1159
Grade: Hasan (Fair) according to At-Tirmidhi
Ali Al-Qari said, "That she prostrates to her husband is due to the number of his rights over her and her difficulty in maintaining gratitude for them. This rhetorical point conveys the obligation of the wife to obey her husband in his rights. Indeed, prostration is not lawful to anyone other than Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala."
Source: Mirqāt Al-Mafātīḥ 5/2125 
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The world is enjoyment and the best enjoyment in the world is a righteous wife." 
Source: Sahih Muslim 1467
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A woman is married for four things: her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman otherwise you will be a loser."
Sahih Al-Bukhari 5090
In-book reference: Book 67 Hadith 28
USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 7, Book 62, Hadith 27
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Sunday, September 3, 2023

Note: What Many INTJs Respect - Authenticity, Reliability And Strong Personality

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 
📜 Question: As a Muslimah whose MBTI personality type is INTJ-A, what are some things which if a person does can increase your respect for them? In your opinion, what makes someone respectable? 
📝 Answer: If... 1] They sincerely try their best for Allah's sake to remain honest, trustworthy and dependable. For instance, if they're a colleague, they avoid slacking and frequent absences as much as possible. 
2] It's obvious that they don't have any selfish agenda while they genuinely want what is best not just for their faith Imaan but also for others' spiritual well-being in both worlds. They're authentically generous, helpful and kind without expecting specific rewards from you in return. 
3] They're morally strong and confident enough to refrain from acting passive-aggressive whenever they deal with temporary negative emotions. Even if they may slightly dislike several individuals, they won't gossip about them, since cowardly backbiting is commonly an indication of the gossipers' intense envy. 
4] Flattery, compliments, rhetorical questions, criticism and people's opinions of them do not affect their feelings and goals at all. They strive to be persistent for Allah's sake in doing what they firmly believe can please Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala regardless of what people say and perceive. 
5] They are always eager to learn more about Islam (without being "religiously arrogant"), apply the good lessons they've learned and generously share their knowledge with others online and offline for Allah's sake whenever they can. 
~•~
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah (The Almighty) wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it (the righteous deed) will erase it (the sin), and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi 
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The merciful will be shown mercy by (Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) the Most Merciful. Be merciful to those on the earth and the One (Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) in the heavens will have mercy upon you."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1924
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "The believer is one who is trusted by the people. The Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe (not guilty of backbiting, telling lies, and knowingly committing injustice). The emigrant (muhaajir) is one who emigrates away from evil. By the One (Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) in Whose Hand is my soul, a servant will not enter Paradise if his neighbor is not secure from his harm."
Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 515 
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut
📖 Anas Ibn Malik RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: A bedouin asked the Messenger of Allah SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam “When is the Hour (the Day of Resurrection)?” The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, “What have you prepared for it?” The man said, “Love for Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) and His Messenger (SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam).” The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "You will be with those whom you love."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3435
Sahih Muslim 2639
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (Authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim
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Sunday, August 27, 2023

Note: If you do at least 3 of these, you're an immature "adult"

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

📑 Checklist to determine if you're emotionally immature (or insecure) and you seriously need to work on developing your good character - if you are guilty of at least three of these, you aren't a mature adult:
1. A lot of times whatever emotion you feel inside gets outwardly expressed in the form of morally inappropriate acts or negative statements. It's obvious that you let silly emotions control you most of the time. [   ] 
2. You're obnoxiously nosy, frequently spying on others' lives instead of minding your own business. Regularly stalking the online profiles of those whom you secretly envy or despise is one of your strange obsessions. [   ] 
3. You stupidly assume that it's alright to steal, scam and deceive others. [   ] 
4. Like an oversized bully whose gigantic ego gets hurt easily, one of the weird things you usually do is giving instructions to similarly ignorant or naive people to misbehave and mistreat others just so you can feel better about your discontented self (e.g. "when so-and-so arrives, pretend to ignore her. I want her to feel as awful as I did when she told me such and such. Don't answer her messages so she can feel how I felt when she chose to boycott my YouTube channel etc.". [   ] 
5. In many instances, particularly at several social events, you've displayed how terribly greedy and selfish you are. It would be an absolute lie to describe yourself as genuinely helpful, kind and generous. [   ] 
6. You always insist on being liked or admired by certain individuals. It's difficult for you to detach and move on from an indifferent person who clearly isn't willing to start any connection with you. [   ] 
7. Idiotically you believe that it's okay to invent lies just to inflate your gargantuan ego and make others feel "jealous". [   ] 
~•~
📖 Abu Dharr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Fear Allah (The Almighty) wherever you are, follow a bad deed with a good deed and it will erase it, and behave well with good character towards the people."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 1987
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to At-Tirmidhi
📖 Abu Darda RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Nothing is heavier upon the scale of a believer on the Day of Resurrection than his good character. Verily, Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) hates the vulgar and obscene person (prone to wicked conduct and vile speech such as knowingly telling lies, backbiting, spreading rumors)."
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2002
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Arna'ut
📖 Abdullah Ibn Amr RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Verily, among the best of you are those with the best character."
Source: Sahih Al-Bukhari 3366
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi
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Tips: Can an introvert wife stay contented with an extroverted husband? Of course

💐 In The Name Of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful 

🗒️ Question: Is it possible for a wife to get along peacefully with her husband if she's an introvert while he's an extrovert? What do you usually do as an INTJ (1w9) to avoid conflict with your ESFJ (3w2) husband? 
📝 Answer: 1. Consistently remind yourself of the main purpose or multiple reasons why you willingly accepted your husband's marriage proposal in the beginning. If you truly love your spouse for Allah's sake, courageously forgiving him and maintaining steadfast patience (Sabr) with his shortcomings won't be challenging. 
2. Stubbornly recall all of your husband's admirable qualities as well as the numerous favors and loving gestures which he has undeniably shown you in the past and present (for example oftentimes feeding you with his right hand and generously sharing his meals with you even though you've got your own food, caring enough about you to provide sincere advice and correcting you whenever he notices you doing something wrong, attempting to make you laugh with his cute sense of humor every now and then etc.). 
3. For Allah's sake spend time together whenever you can through attending some family gatherings, particularly during Ramadan and Eid. Make it evident that you also care about his loved ones by frequently visiting them, at least once a month or every two months, and greeting them online when you're not busy. 
4. Let your husband know about your likes and dislikes, and familiarize yourself with what he prefers and what makes him uncomfortable. As his loyal and patient wife, refrain from unreasonably expecting him to be one hundred percent "perfect", and stay away from saying anything which could bring about pointless drama as much as possible.
5. As long as you both aren't doing what clearly displeases Allah the Almighty, genuinely be okay with letting him spend time with his friends and colleagues without interrogating him about every single one of his actions as if you can't trust him, just as you wouldn't want him to be the excessively jealous and insecure type of husband who prevents his wife from building meaningful connections.
~•~
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes."
Source: Sahih Ibn Hibbān 4252
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Al-Albani
📖 Abu Huraira RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e. her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser."
Sahih Al-Bukhari 5090
In-book reference: Book 67 Hadith 28
USC-MSA web (English) reference: Vol. 7, Book 62, Hadith 27 
📖 Jabir RadhiAllahu 'anhu narrated: Allah's noble Messenger Muhammad SallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Verily, shaytan places his throne over the water and he sends out his troops. The closest to him in rank are the greatest at causing tribulations (mischief, trouble). One of them says: 'I have done this and this.' shaytan says: 'you have done nothing.' Another one says: 'I did not leave this man alone until I separated him from his wife.' shaytan embraces him and he says: 'you have done well!'" 
Source: Sahih Muslim 2813 
Grade: Sahih (Authentic) according to Muslim 
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